If it's the last thing I do
by Kitty-Guardian Dorothy
Summary: "...I will kill you"  The turtles are shocked whenever they find their brother not only working for the Shredder and completely polar of himself but willingly pitted against them too. Why is he so hellbent on hurting Raphael? Will contain Turtlecest later
1. Prologue

**If its the Last thing I do**

Okay, notes before the story –

Yes there is turtlecest, I like it a lot but in all honestly I know it will not actually happen; Peter Laird and Kevin Eastman made the turtles out as BROTHERS! But this is fanfiction so it very well can exist.

Pairings: R/M, one-sidded L/M, D/L, Casey/April, Karai/Chaplin.

Disclaimer: TMNT Belongs to Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird.

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><p>"<strong>Who are you loyal to?"<strong>

"_I am loyal only to Master Shredder."_

"**Who are your enemies?"**

"_The enemies of my master are my enemies."_

"**Do you feel any loyalty towards the turtles?"**

"_They – no – __He__ will pay! I do not care for the others, but __he__ will pay."_

"**What is your one and only true clan?"**

"_The Foot, my lord."_

"**Who is your family?"**

"_My only family is Karai and my master Shredder."_

"**Do you believe you are ready?"**

"_I am ready once you believe I am."_

"**You are ready, indeed. You are very ready for your personal mission, my son. You have my permission t destroy ****that**** turtle."**

"_Thank you my lord, I promise you that this will destroy them from the inside-out."_

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><p><em>End of Prologue, I promise the other chapters will not be this short and un-descriptive.<em>


	2. Vanished

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

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><p>"Ya gonna hafta do betta' den dat bro!" Raph taunted as he side-stepped and tripped Donnie, who had been charging at him. Raph laughed and launched himself away before Donnie had the chance to get back up on him feet.<p>

Leo grinned as he dodged Donnie from catching him too. Right now they were playing rooftop tag, things finally seemed to be getting a bit more normal. No wait that thought made his grin drop into a frown. Things could never be normal again, not since Mikey disappeared.

_It was truly strange…..One day, he just wasn't there. They didn't realize it until dinner, when Donnie went to get Mikey from his room but saw he was gone. Leo and Donnie had been gone most of that day because they had been out on a supply run, Master Splinter had been gone all week visiting the Ancient One and the Ninja Tribunal and the only one who had been home was Raph. Raph told them that he and Mikey got into a fight…Somehow Raph passed out…And Mikey was gone when he woke up. He insisted Mikey was just being a baby and would probably be back in the dead of night._

_But he hadn't come back in the dead of night, he never came back._

_They searched for months, and during Patrol they still searched. All of their friends helped too, but to no avail. They could never find a single trace. The entire Hamato family had been affected; Donnie especially, since Mikey was his best friend. Donnie became more withdrawn, he just slept all the time, or worked on projects when he wasn't sleeping, he barely spoke anymore because of the grief. Raph became more irritable and angry like he always was whenever something like this happened, he wasn't home much anymore because he said it was 'too damn quiet', even if he insisted that he didn't, Raph missed Mikey way more than he let in, more than once Leo had found his sibling crying. Master Splinter helped them cope when he came home, but the aged rat was silently grieving as well._

_And Leonardo himself? He still practiced his kata's and meditated, he still lectured his remaining brothers and argued with Raph. He was still the 'fearless leader' of the group. But on the inside he was truly devastated over their missing brother; how this time he couldn't make things better, how he didn't know if the youngest was okay or even alive – NO! He was alive! Leo refused to believe otherwise unless he saw it for himself. Leonardo had to appear strong for the rest of his brothers, be the support beam for the collapsing ceiling that was his family._

_The lair was so quiet now, no Mikey to piss Raph off, to annoy Don out of his lab, to frustrate Leo or Master Splinter for goofing off during training. To Leo, it was pretty damn depressing._

_Raph brooded that he couldn't blame anyone over Mikey's disappearance – that there was no one he could beat up for taking the youngest away from them._

_Donnie sulked that he couldn't find answers – there were no books or internet links that could somehow point them in the direction of the youngest turtle._

_Master Splinter was frustrated that he couldn't do anything to help his sons – meditation wasn't enough to find his son._

_Leo agonized that he couldn't find Mikey – that he couldn't come up with any plan, or use some sort of strategy that would bring the orange goofball back._

_Leo had realized something as well, the more and more he missed Mikey, the more and more he thought about him. And after a year Leo realized why the orange-banded turtle was constantly in his mind, and his dreams._

_He loved Mikey. In a way that wasn't brotherly, in a way that wasn't plain __**natural. **__In a way that was completely __**wrong.**_

"Leo?" The blue-banded turtle was snapped out of his daze when he heard Donnie's voice.

"Bro, you were spacin' out again." Raph said as he came up to his two brothers "Donnie tagged ya, but you just kept standin' dere like a statue or somethin'."

"I uhh…" Leo trailed off.

"You were thinkin' about it again, huh?" Raph asked with a sad tone in his Brooklyn-accented voice. Leo looked away from him and Don.

"Yeah, I was. I-I just can't help it. We can never find him! Where could he possibly be, guys?" The emotions were spilling out now and Leo couldn't help it "He could be hurt, and we can't do anything about it! We don't know where he is! I mean, could we have done something that drove him away?" Tears sprang in Leo's eyes, but he quickly wiped them away.

Don put a hand on Leo's shoulder. "We all miss Mikey, Leo."

"Yeah." Raph offered with a ghost of a smile "Pain in the shell or not, Mikey's still our little bro, we all miss 'im. We'll find 'im. But hey, it's Mikey rememba; it's not like dat bonehead can get inta that much trouble right?"

"Yeah Leo." Donnie encouraged "We should be more worried if Raph turns up missing; either he's in serious trouble or a purple dragon is."

Raph scoffed at that, but Leo managed a small smile "I guess your right, thanks guys."

The brothers continued their patrol, but they weren't aware of the slender figure watching them from a nearby building, eyes gleaming in the dark.

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><p>Well, they didn't notice the figure until it through shurikan at their feet, about fifteen minutes later<p>

The three turtles turned to their shadowy assailant, who ran off as soon as they spotted it.

"It's Karai!" Leo shouted, recognizing her shape immediately.

"I don't care who it is, she's gettin' away!" Raph shouted, enraged. The hothead jumped to the next building and chased her, Don and Leo followed suit.

Leo couldn't help but notice as the female ninja kept glancing back at them, as if to make sure they were following her. It made Leo's skin crawl, but he quickly shook it off.

"Ya can't run, Karai!" Raph yelled and nearly caught up to her before she jumped into a building through an open window. "Ya can't hide eitha'!" he growled before jumping into the window as well.

"It's an abandoned warehouse." Donnie told Leo "It might be a trap."

"Trap or not, we can't leave Raph alone with her." Leo said, he was about to jump into the window as well, but Donnie stopped him.

"Uhh…Leo?" Donnie asked nervously, fidgeting a little.

"Yes? What is it Don?" Leo asked concerned and tried to make eye-contact, but Donnie turned away from his gaze immediately.

"I uhh…I...I-It's nothing. Forget I said anything." The purple-masked genius excused before jumping into the building.

Leo was confused, wondering what his brother was trying to tell him before, but quickly followed him into the warehouse.

It was dark, the windows offered little dim lighting, which set mysterious shadows and gray tones of stillness.

Raph was in the middle of the shadowy room, Don and Leo were soon at his side.

"Karai!" Leo shouted "Show yourself!"

"Quit hidin' like a coward! Come out and fight!" Raph challenged and brandished his sai.

"Certainly." Came a cool reply from Karai, who stepped out of the shadows, her face didn't show any emotion.

"Karai, why did you bring us here?" Leo asked, holding his katanna out in a defensive stance.

"Someone wants to see you." Karai said simply, she drew out her own katanna.

"Oh, and who's that?" Don asked, quickly holding out his bo staff.

"That would be me." A somewhat but not really familiar monotone voice answered before a figure jumped from somewhere on the ceiling and gracefully landed behind Karai, in the shadows.

"Well where here! So come out of the dark and face us!" Raph growled.

The figure stepped into the dim light.

Leonardo, Donatello and Raphael gasped.

"_MIKEY!_" They shouted in unison.

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><p><em>Yup, that's right. Mikey joined the dark side.<em>

_It probaly went something like this;_

_Shredder: Join us on the dark side, Michaelangelo!_

_Mikey: I don't know..._

_Shredder; We have cookies!_

_Mikey; Sold!_


	3. Alternate

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

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><p>Mikey looked different, very different; He wore a black mask and a Foot soldier uniform (What the turtles wore in Identity Crisis) with the sleeves of the shirt torn off. His former orange mask was tied around his right forearm, hanging off of his belt weren't his nunchaku but a pair of <em>chigiriki<em> (Japanese flail weapon) and he carried a _Jumonji Yari_ (Cross-shaped spear) on his back. There was a Foot symbol tattooed on his left shoulder, he also had metal wrist bands on. Mikey was also taller and more muscular then the last time they saw him, though he was more gaunt and skinny too.

What was the most unsettling, however, was his facial expression and his eyes. Mikey's usually smiley face was intense with anger and resentment, his head was cocked to the side and his arms were crossed so he had a scowling posture. His eyes…It scared his three brothers; his eyes used to be with child-like, gleaming with mischief, a open window to his soul. But now….They were narrowed and all emotions were closed off, the once azure color was now clouded to a dark shade of blue-gray, like the rainy sky.

Donnie was the first to get over the shock. He seemed to not notice how Mikey looked now, he was just happy to see his younger brother again. "Mikey!" He cried out –in joy this time- and ran towards him.

Mikey didn't move when Don threw his arms around him in a hug, his empty expression didn't change, but he did uncross his arms to let them dangle at his sides. Mikey just stood there as Don continued to hug him.

Then Leo and Raph got over shock; but they were uncertain of what to do; Raph knew something was up because Mikey was dressed like the Foot, and Leo could sense a foreboding aura radiating off of him.

Don was unaware of anything at the time, until he pulled away that is. "Mikey?" He asked in confusion and looked the younger terrapin in the eyes, then finally realized how different Mikey looked.

Suddenly a grin of amusement twisted on Mikey's face. "Hey _bro's. _Been a while, hasn't it?" Hearing Mikey's voice made Don back away a little; Mikey's didn't speak with a surfer's accent anymore, and his voice was more low and gruff. But that wasn't it – the way he spoke to them, his voice dripped with a malicious amusement, he almost seemed to be threatening them.

"What the shell is goin' on! Mikey, watta'ya doin' with _Karai?_" Raph demanded and got into a less offensive stance. Mikey locked his blue-gray gaze onto Raph and a feral growl tore from his throat. His amusement instantly disappeared and a intense form of rage and hatred twisted onto his features.

Leo found this confusing; sure it was scary seeing Mikey like this, but he was curios as to why the black-banded turtle reacted to Raph like that.

"Mikey," Leo said, struggling to keep his voice level "what is this?" he asked the question all of them were thinking.

"What does it look like, _Leonardo?_" Mikey asked, his gruff voice uncharacteristically monotone. The spat out the blue-masked turtles name with emphasis. The amused grin returned "I'm part of The Foot now."

"WHAT!" The three other turtles yelled, Mikey's grin grew more twisted.

"M-Mikey!" Don said "H-How…How could you…?" Don kept trailing off from surprise, so Mikey finished for him.

"Join the Dark side?" Mikey shrugged "They offered cookies."

"Your not serious, are ya!" Raph asked, both enraged and confused by their brothers betrayal.

Mikey once more went livid with rage. He through a Shurikan at Raph, it just barely missed (it was probably a warning). "OF COURSE I'M NOT FUCKING SERIOUS!" He roared and brought out his _Chigiriki,_ the weights at the end spinning wildly"YOU KNOW WHY RAPH, YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID!"

"What the shell are you talkin' about?" Raph yelled back. He had no clue what he was talking about. Leo and Donnie turned to Raph in confusion; did he really do something.

"Don't give me that!" Mikey snarled "You know what you did, quit lying! Quit pretending to be innocent!" Mikey's dark blue-gray eyes suddenly icy in uncontrollably anger and another emotion they had never seen on Mikey: Hatred. Hatred directed on Raph, and Raph only.

"Mikey, I have no clue what your talkin' about!" Raph insisted and thought hard on anything he did that could have gotten Mikey to act like this.

"Liar!" Roared Mikey and he turned to Karai "I got the ugly one; you deal with the other two."

Karai nodded and jumped at Leo and Don. Mikey charged at Raphael. The hated and anger more intense than ever.

All shell broke loose.


	4. What did I do?

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

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><p>Mikey kept throwing blows at Raph, who kept getting hit and could only dogde a few of the blows; he would get pretty nasty bruises later on. The red-banded turtle was surprised how fast Mikey was moving. Though he was completely aware that Mikey was the one with the most acrobatic skill (i.e. Fast and flexible.); it seemed all of those skills and his strength had been heightened ten fold. But thats not why Raph didn't want to fight him, so he tried to talk to him instead "Don't do this bro…I don't wanna hurt you."<p>

Mikey responded by swinging the chain of his _chigiriki _around Raphs right wrist, he turned, pushed the back of his body against the front of Raph's and threw him over his shoulder. Raph cried out as he was flung to the wall, hit said wall hard and slid down. "Okay…._Now_ I want to hurt you." The hothead growled and charged at Mikey.

Raph kept throwing several punches and kicks, but Mikey kept dodging either by ducking or jumping or shifting, which was getting Raph more frustrated.

"You're predictable as ever." Mikey taunted and did a Reverse Hook kick, striking Raph in the side of the head. Raph yelled in pain and managed not to fall.

Raph was instantly back on his feet and he charged at Mikey with his sai's. Mikey just stood, but did a Butterfly Twist right over Raph's head. Raph didn't have time to stop and Mikey did a Reverse Crescent Kick that struck Raph in the shell, making him fall to the ground again.

Mikey put a foot to Raphs side and rolled him from his plastron to his shell, then put his foot on Raphs plastron; almost crushing him. "_Pathetic._" Mikey spat. When Raph tried to get away, Mikey whipped out his _Jumonji-Yari_ and held the tip of the spear-head to Raphs throat.

"Mikey…" Raph gulped "…Please…" It was shameful, but Raph didn't want to be gutted by his own brother. He hoped he could somehow talk sense to the younger turtle.

"Please _what_ Raphael?" Mikey asked mockingly "Don't kill you? Oh I won't kill you, Raphie-boy." He said before blaming on of his hands around Raphs neck and hoisted him up, slamming his body against the nearest support beam. Raph coughed and struggled to breath through the crushing grip Mikey had on his throat. Raph froze when Mikey got his face close to his; staring straight into his eyes, his hatred boring right into Raphs soul. "I'm going to _hurt_ you instead. I'll hurt you so much you'll wish you were dead. I'll hurt you so bad…" Mikey hissed. Raph trembled; he was, for the first time, truely terrified of Mikey. Why? Because by the way Mikey sounded…He was dead serious.

"Mikey…" Raph struggled to talk with Mikey's hand around his throat "What…Did…What…Did I do?" he managed to cough out, his oxygen supply was getting dangerously low and it was making him dizzy. Mikey growled and used the _Jumonji-Yari _in his other hand to slash Raph on his arm. Raph bit back a sharp cry of pain.

"Don't act like you-" Mikey cut himself off when he stared into Raphs eyes again; they all grew up with each other, all of them were closer than most brothers, and they can always how to read one another's emotions. Mikey could see in Raphs eyes that he was honestly confused. Confused why Mikey wanted to hurt him.

"Fuck." Mikey cursed, it sounded wrong coming from him. "You really don't know do you? Ph, I guess this doesn't surprise me."

Raph fell to the ground when Mikey let go of his throat. "Karai!" Mikey called.

Karai had finished her battle against Donatello and Leonardo minutes after the battle started. Karai had the chain of her _Kusarigama _wrapped around the legs of both Don and Leo and because of that they were on the floor; the sickle was near Leonardo's throat. "Yes, brother?" she called back.

"Don't you dare call him that! He's our brother, not yours!" Raph hissed. He was rewarded by Mikey using a Roundhouse kick at Raphs side, knocking him several feet away. Raph nearly blacked out, for a moment all he could see was blinding white light, he clutched his sore side.

"_You_ will be silent!" Mikey snarled at him, before talking with Karai again "For now we must leave them."

"Why is that?" Karai asked as she drew the sickle away from Leo, who sighed in relief; he hadn't seen the fight between Raph and Mikey and he thought that Maybe Mikey was in his right mind again and decided to not attack them.

"Hothead doesn't remember what he did that day." Mikey growled "When he realizes it, then we really get them. But until then we're just going to have to keep weakening them." The black-banded turtle walked towards Raph and held him up, again by the throat. Then he turned to his two other brothers "You two better not get in my way." He threatened before throwing Raph at them. Leo and Don still had the chain of the _Kusarigama_ wrapped around their legs, so they couldn't get away; Raph landed on them. Only then did Karai wrench the chain off of them, this time Raph did black out because the back of his head slammed against Leo's plastron. "Or trust me, next time I won't be so easy on him."

Mikey strided to Karai, but at the half-way point he turned back to his brothers, he looked at them for a second before wrenching his orange mask off of his forearm and threw it in front of them. A sign; a sign that he was longer of their clan.

Mikey and Karai withdrew into the shadows.

"Mikey, wait!" Don and Leo called back. Don gingerly picked up Mikey's mask and clutched it tight, as if was their last link to the old Mikey.

This was their reply;

"Don't call me that…My name is now _Oroku Angelo_, son of Oroku Saki, brother to Oroku Karai! Homato Michaelangelo is dead. Remember my name in fear! And tell Raphael I said "_If it's the Last thing I do…_" Leo and Don flinched at the last few words.

"_…I will kill you..."._"

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><p><em>Yup, know that from now on Mikey will be called 'Angelo' when the story turns to his or the foots POV. But when its in his brothers POV, he will still be called 'Mikey'<em>

_Make sense?_

_Yeah, what happened won't exactly be revealed untill a couple of chapters ahead._


	5. Smoke and Tears

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

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><p>Something was wrong.<p>

Splinter knew it as soon as he was snapped out of his meditation; something wasn't right. It could have been animal instincts, it could have been his wise intuition, it could have been anything; but he still sensed it. And he sensed right; soon enough his three remaining sons stumbled into the lair, he could hear Raphael moaning in pain.

The gray rat left his room and went to the aid of his sons, Donatello and Leonardo had were holding an unconscious Raphael between them. Splinter froze several yards away from them; there was a certain scent lingering strongly on Raphael and faintly on Donatello. Splinter recognized it instantly.

"Michelangelo…." The ninjitsu master whispered.

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><p>Angelo stood on the balcony of his room, it was raining now and it was dark so if anyone saw him they would only see his dark shape, well they wouldn't see that either because there was huge tree right next to the balcony that surrounded it. It was perfect for Angelo not to be seen but still get fresh air or to see the night sky.<p>

This time he wasn't getting fresh air; quite the opposite, he was actually smoking and didn't want to stink up his room. Angelo wasn't addicted to smoking; he could easily give it up thanks to his mutated turtle anatomy. It didn't really help his stress (Also probably because of his Mutated Turtle Anatomy); all it really did to him was pollute his lungs. Why he did it, he himself didn't really know. It didn't really matter to him anyways; he only smoke once every month or so.

Angelo took the cigarette away from his mouth and blew the smoke out, staring at the smoke disapearing overhead before someone entered his room. "Angelo?" The voice of Karai called.

"On the balcony." He called back and put the cigarette back to his lips, his eyes not leaving the sight of the ghostly half-moon.

Karai came out rested against the railing of the balcony. "You really shouldn't smoke." She scowled.

"I shouldn't; but I do." Angelo shrugged and puffed out again.

"You're only nineteen!" Karai insisted.

"Any other reason you're here, sis? Other than to lecture me on how to follow the laws of the American government who wouldn't think twice before dissecting me?" Angelo asked sarcastically with the trademark goofy grin of his old self.

Karai smirked a little at the joke before getting serious "It about the fight earlier." Said she, saddling closer to the sea-green turtle.

"Oh." Angelo said and looked down at his feet. He fumbled in his pocket and brought out a small box. "Smoke?" He offered.

Karai would have turned him down, but figured one couldn't hurt. "Ah, what the Hell." She shrugged and took out one of the cigarettes; she rarely ever smoked, but this wasn't the first time, being the Heir to a wealthy company has its stress after all.

Angelo lit her cigarette for her, and drew his own towards his lips and quickly blew out "What's there to talk about?" He asked, smoke curling out of his mouth, he then tapped the end of the cigarette against the railing to shake the ash away.

"Brother…Why is it so important for Raphael to know? From what told me, it should have been expected for him not to remember." Karai flinched when Angelo growled at the mention of his red-banded brothers name.

Angelo sighed and learned against the railing, a trail of tears shamelessly escaping his blue-gray eyes. Angelo only let himself show emotion like these around Karai, the only one he could ever truly trust in the Foot. "I-I….I don't know….I guess I just want him to really regret it, but he can't regret what he doesn't remember."

Karai threw her cigarette away and wrapped her arms around Angelo in a comforting hug. The black-masked turtle threw his cigarette to the ground and started to sob in her shoulder. He quickly became hysteric like he always did once he started.

They stayed like that for about fifteen minutes before Angelo drew away from his adoptive sister, he wiped his tears away. "Pathetic…" he hissed to himself, which made Karai's heart ache.

Karai gently placed a hand on her brothers shoulder "Do you want to talk about it?" She offered. Angelo turned away and shut his eyes tightly to squeeze the last of his tears out.

"Don't." He whispered his voice hoarse from both crying and smoking. His eyes were now red and puffy.

"Angelo...Brother, just know I'll always be here for you." Karai said to him in the most tender tone she could muster, she turned to leave.

"Wait." Angelo called.

Karai turned back to him; she saw that his eyes were azure like they used to be, which meant he was his old self again, but she knew that soon enough the dark gray shades and the 'cruel foot ninja' version of him would return.

Discomfort raked through Angelo's body "C-Can you stay with me tonight? I know Chaplin won't appreciate it, b-but you know how I get." He asked shakily, knowing those _dreams_ would be haunting him tonight.

When Karai saw the distress in his widened eyes, she couldn't say no.

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><p>Splinter couldn't believe what he would hearing – his youngest son, the baby of the family, was alive, but he was working for the foot and he…<em>Wasn't himself <em>as Leonardo put it. Splinter was thankful Donatello told him to sit down, he would have certainly fallen; he just dropped the cup of green tea he had in one hand. His other hand was tightly clutching the orange mask Michaelangelo had disgarded.

No one paid attention to the broken cup or spilled tea.

"Oh my son….." Splinter whispered, his paws clenched into fists; Karai, like her father, had taken one of Splinters family.

Raphael was lying on the sofa, still unconscious and being treated by Donatello for the heavy bruises and cracked ribs. Splinter couldn't believe it had been Michaelangelo who had left Raphael in such condition, like Donatello he didn't like hurting others when he fought…Well much anyways. But seeing what Michaelangelo had done to his own brother…

Master Yoshi would be disapointed, Splinter had failed as a father and sensei.

Donatello had told him that Michaelangelo had threatened 'not to be so easy' on Raphael next time they encountered. Splinter feared for his aggressive sons safety, and for his youngest. What monsters invaded Michaelangelo's mind? What demons were he fighting?

Splinter glanced at Raphael again; he had also heard that Michaelangelo placed his rage and hatred solely on Raphael. That worried Splinter; he always feared that Raphael's anger would one day cause him to hurt his brother, but he always thought he would _physically _hurt them, not…this.

"M-Master Splinter?" Leonardo's voice brought Splinter back to reality. The rat turned to his eldest and his heart became heavier; Leonardo, who was usually so calm, collected and stable, looked so confused…and scared, Splinter had never seen him this afraid except for when he was younger and feared heights.

"What is it, my son?" Splinter asked in a gentle tone, to hopefully sooth his eldest son.

"M-Mikey said something else just as he was leaving." Leonardo was hesitant, but Splinter nodded in encouragement for him to continue "H-He said that 'Michaelangelo' was dead…He said….His name was Oroku Angelo….He said he was Oroku Saki's son."

That shattered Splinters heart; Michaelangelo had disowned himself from the family. Did Michaelangelo really not consider Splinter as his father?

Tears leaked out of Splinters eyes, but he wiped them away, he needed to be strong for his sons.

Then Splinter realized something.

"Leonardo? Did Michaelangelo indeed say he was Oroku Saki's son?" Splinter asked.

"Yes, he did."

"How could he be son to Oroku Saki unless…." Splinter trailed off in dread.

Leonardo's leaf-green skin paled. "The Shredder has returned."

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><p>[<strong>AN, This takes place after the 'Turtles Forever' movie, so Shredder isn't on the asteroid anymore, he somehow found a way back**]

_Dun, dun, dun! That's right loyal readers, the Shredder is back! Well…We already knew that, but they didn't!_

_I'm not sure how old the turtles are; when the Turtles forever verse started when they were fifteen, I estimate that it had been about three years (After all, they spent about a year in the Fast Foreword ark) so they would be eighteen or seventeen around the time of Turtles forever, and this is more than a year after the events of the movie and 'Wedding Bells and Bytes'. So I'm guessing Mikey and his brothers are nineteen. Might or Might not be accurate._

_Also, Mikey and Karai have grown close in the past year and Karai isn't 'evil' or anything, I'm trying hard not to make her out as OOC or anything…But it's hard, her personality is really hard to distinguish. In this fic she is still very loyal to her father, but she consiters Mikey a brother…So yeah, the whole torn-loyalty thing._

_I probably over-did Mikey's new personality with the smoking gag...Eh, sue me, I think it works pretty well!_


	6. Talk

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

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><p>"Raph, what the shell did you <em>do<em> to him?" Leo demanded as soon as Raph regained consciousness, Raph winced at his aching sides where had Mikey kicked him.

"Well good morning to you too, fearless." Raph snorted. Leo punched him in the face. "Oww! Shell! What's gotten inta' you?" Raph asked shocked, holding his cheek, which was already bruised and felt even worse now.

"What. Did. You. Do?" Leo emphasized; Raph gotten the blue-masked peeved off plenty of times before, but he'd never seen Leo so upset before.

"I'll tell you what I told Mikey; I have no idea. If it was really serious I would have remembered!" Raph growled in frustration; he couldn't remember ever doing anything out of the ordinary that could have gotten Mikey to join the Foot and swear revenge on him.

"_Your _definition of really serious differentiates from everyone else's." Said Don, who came to Raph with a glass of water and aspirin. Raph gladly accepted them and kicked the pills back with water.

Raph winced as the throbbing in his head started to dull "Shell…Why is Mikey of all turtles suddenly so good at fightin'? I mean it's _Mikey!_" he growled while poking at the bandages on his arm, where Mikey had slashed him.

Leo glared at Raph, not liking the way he was talking about their younger brother; sure Mikey was the most lazy and less motivated out of the four, but that didn't mean he should be underestimated. "Shredder probably put him through gruesome training or something." Don scowled. Raph was confused.

"Whadda'ya mean?" asked the sai-weilder.

"After you passed out." Leo paused for a second "Karai and Mikey left; but before they did, he told us he was…" he trailed off, not wanting to believe it.

"Was what? Stark, raving mad? Because I already know that." Raph snorted sarcastically, looking away; but Leo caught the fear in Raph's eyes, his fear of Mikey 'hurting' him like he said he would. Fear and confusion for and of what their youngest brother had become.

Agh, all of them were scared and confused at this point.

"No," Don snapped "He told us his new name was Oroku Angelo, and that he was the 'son of Shredder', you know what that means, Raph? It means the Shredder is back, and he brainwashed our little brother!"

Raph and Leo were both surprised over Don's outburst, but they figured it was bound to happen sooner or later, Don was really shaken up by Mikey's 're-appearance'.

"And he had a message for you Raph…" Don whispered "He s-said _'If it's the Last thing I do….I'll kill you'_." Don suddenly fell to his knee's, shaking uncontrollably.

"Donnie?" Leo asked in alarm and knelt by their olive-green brother. "What's wrong?"

"I-It's Mikey!" Don said, his voice edging to hysteria "T-There's no way that can be Mikey! He can't be…." Don started to cry into Leo's plastron, which surprised him because Don rarely ever cried, and he was starting to get more hysterical. "It's n-not hi-him!"

Leo turned his head to Raph and pointed at the glass of water, and the nearby bottle of sedative Don had brought with him in case if Raph decided to sneak topside later. Raph nodded and put some of the sedative in the water before handing it to Leo.

Leo managed to coax Donnie into drinking some of it, since he didn't see Raph spike it. Minutes later Don was knocked out cold.

Leo sighed "Sorry about that Donnie; but there was no other way to calm you down." He apologized to the drugged turtle before carrying him to his room.

Leo tucked Donnie into the covers and rubbed the top of his head in an affectionate way, a smile flicked on face when he saw Donnie relax in his slumber. He really didn't like seeing his genius brother too upset.

Leo softy left the room and back into the living room. He sat next to Raph who managed to sit up. "Raph, are you _sure _you don't remember ever doing anything to Mikey?" he asked, very serious.

"I didn't do anything!" Raph snapped, he was getting fed up with being blamed for what Mikey had become. Whatever he did, Mikey was probably being a baby about it.

"Raph," Leo said sternly and bore his brown eyes into Raph's amber ones "I want you to really, really _think_ about it. Remember what you told us the night Mikey disappeared? You told us you guys got into a argument, then to an all-out physical fight. What were you guys fighting about?"

Raph thought for a moment but shrugged "Somethin' stupid, I guess. I don't really remember." Leo saw Raph glancing around nervously. There was something Raph was leaving out; something he probably thought didn't matter until now.

"Raph…" Leo warned "What is it your not telling me?"

Raph got up "Look fearless, it's been a long night and we're all freaked out about this Mikey thing. Give me some time to think." The dark-green skinned Turtle said to his older brother before exiting quickly into his own room.

Leo didn't stop him, he had a point; they all needed time to get over shock and collect their thoughts. Leo looked at the clock – it was 3:29 in the morning. To think, only three and a half hours ago they had left for patrol. Two hours ago they found Mikey, an hour and a half ago they had come home.

Not enough time to absorb how things had gotten shit-side up so fast.

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><p><em>Yup, this was more of a filler, nothing really signifficant happens. Next chapter is about <em>**Angelo's** _life in The Foot Clan._

_Please review!_

_Authors Note: There will be flashbacks in later chapters explaining Mikeys whole exsperiance, with; the foot, his training, Karai, why he wants Raph dead, ect. It will come a few chapters ahead after Raph figues out what he did._


	7. A Morning in the Foot

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

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><p><strong><span>NOTE TO THE REVIEWERS:<span>**

**Rose Black Dragon: Okay, I understand that you don't like Karai, so let's just say that while Mikey changed, his old personality sort of rubbed off on her for reasons that will be explained later. **_Agradezco__ tus comentarios muy agradable tanto a mi amigo, y me alegro de que decidió mirar más allá de su disgusto por Karai y seguir leyendo_

**Epicenter Six: How do I update so damn quickly, you ask? It's simple; I actually have the chapters done ahead of time. Like this; I would post a chapter, and the two chapters ahead of it would already be done. That gives me time to look over mistakes and change things, and it gives people time to read it. Thank you for your advice, I am open to both your advice and opinions and I am honored you stick as a loyal reader and reviewer.**

**To both of you: Thank you for continually reviewing, you two are the only ones who review. I would like a lot of reviewers, but two loyal reviewers is good too.**

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><p>When Angelo woke up he realized he being held by Karai. Faintly he remembered how hard the night had been for them both; How Angelo would constantly wake up, sobbing, Karai would flick out of her slumber to gently remind him he was dreaming and soothe him back to sleep, only for him to wake up sobbing again. It had gone on like that all night, Angelo and Karai were exhausted; Karai especially since she always lingered between consciousness and unconsciousness to soothe him when he woke up. Angelo mentally scowled at himself for being so weak to his emotions; Shredder would not be pleased if he knew. And this was probably something stressful he was putting Karai through, he shouldn't be doing that to her.<p>

The sea-green turtle arose from his bed after carefully removing himself from Karai's arms and stretched; he decided to let Karai continue to sleep since she had practically not gotten any sleep at all. Angelo looked at the digital clock on his nightstand; it was six o'clock in the morning. Numbly Angelo thought back to how he used to always wonder how his older brother Leo could get up this early. He quickly shook thoughts of his family away; to say he didn't love them would be a terrible lie, he loved and missed all of them…..except for Raph at least. But they wouldn't understand and they never would. Angelo felt pretty bad how they had to suffer too if he was going to get to Raphael, but they wouldn't suffer as much as the red-banded hotheaded.

Angelo giggled in a twisted way when he thought of ways to make Raph suffer; the annoying voice in the back of his head (that sounded eerily like Donnie) was yelling at him that he was being 'psychotic' and 'sadistic'. Deciding to listen to the voice this time, Angelo locked those thoughts away for now. He wiped the sticky wetness of the tears away from his face and eyes and winced slightly at how much the skin stung from the excess tears and constant wiping.

He exited the room as quietly as possible, and let his adoptive sister sleep.

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><p>Later….<p>

Karai had awoken to find that Angelo was gone. It didn't worry her, this was a recurring event. Quickly she got out of his bed, left to change her clothes in her own room and headed to the Dojo.

She watched from the doorway, the extreme form of training her father subjected him to.

Angelo was blindfolded and he wore headphones where very loud music (Most likely rap, it seems his like for that type of music was a lingering habit) was blocking all sound. He was holding out his _chigiriki _and he was standing between two foot soldiers.

Angelo nodded and the two ninja attacked.

He was still as one charged at him, but just as said ninja drew out his Katanna and got in a striking pose, Angelo whipped the chain of his _chigiriki_ around the soldier's out-stretched wrist and hurled him over his shoulder at the other ninja.

Both ninja's toppled to the ground, but one of them threw several shuriken at Angelo. But the ninja turtle stopped each of them by hitting each of the shuriken with the weight at the end of his weapon.

The foot ninja's got up and circled Angelo before they both charged at him from different directions. At the last second Angelo jumped up and did a 540-Tornado Kick, which hit both of the ninja. The soldiers flew back and hit opposite walls.

Then out of nowhere two more ninja jumped from the ceiling aimed a straight kick at Angelo. For a moment Karai feared they were going to hit him, but Angelo, using both of his _chigiriki, _swung the chain around each of their ankles and slammed both of them to the floor.

Four ninja's were out cold, and it had only taken Angelo two minutes flat.

"Hey Karai." Angelo said to her without taking off his blindfold, but his face was in her general direction. Even for a ninja it was weird to how he knew she was standing there when he couldn't hear or see (Leonardo, eat your heart out).

Before Karai could reply, a Tanto blade flew towards Angelo out of nowhere, but Angelo caught the handle of the blade before it could plunge into his throat.

"Hello _Hun._" Angelo hissed through his teeth and took off his headphones, but the blindfold remained.

A tall, bulky-built blonde man with a ponytail and three slash-scars on his face walked into the room. Hun had a scowl on his face, upset by the fact that Angelo was still breathing. "Hello, _Freak._" He said in an unfriendly way that made it sound more like a threat than a greeting.

Angelo twirled the Tanto on oh of his fingers "Poor shot as usual Hun; you should really stick to guns, leave weapons like these to the Ninja's, you need skill to use them after all." The blue-gray eyed turtle taunted.

That made Hun angry "Know your place, Freak!" he shouted in anger and ran to Angelo, his arm curled back for a nasty punch.

In a split second Angelo turned the Tanto to where the bottom of the hilt was facing Hun. He thrust the bottom of the wooden hilt at the center of Hun's ribcage.

Hun cried out in pain and buckled to his knee's in front of Angelo, who swung the chain of his _chigiriki _around the wrist of the arm Hun was going to punch him with, did a flip and landed on Hun's back/shoulder area.

Karai flinched a little when Angelo wretched Hun's arm up; with the right movements, Angelo could easily dislocate Hun's shoulder. Hun grunted in discomfort.

"Let me tell you some _creative _differences between you and me." Angelo hissed in corrupt glee "You have worked for the Shredder your entire life, you are entirely loyal, you would give your life up for the Shredder without any second thoughts and yet you're the _dog_ of the Foot clan. Then there's Me; I have been the Shredders sworn enemy for three years, I have worked for him for about a year, with enough reason I would betray the Shredder in a heartbeat and he _knows_ that, and yet the Shredder considers _Me_ his own _son. _So don't go around telling me about _my_ place."

Angelo yanked Hun's arm up higher, making the blonde man cringe and cry out again. In a swift movement Angelo jerked Hun's arm out of the _chigiriki _chain and jumped off of his back. "Take that as a warning; next time I _will_ break that arm of yours." He threatened with his monotone voice lower. Angelo calmly stalked out of the room, pausing next to Karai and finally removing his blindfold. Then Karai understood that the reason he'd worn the blindfold during the practice run wasn't just to tune in his other sense - but it was meant to hide his eyes; which were bloodshot and strangely enough his bottom eyelid was bright red from being rubbed raw giving his eyes the appearance of being bleeding (_A/N Imagine what someone would look like if they wore red eyeliner on the bottom eyelid, thats what it looks like_.)

Karai walked with him down the hall "Was that really necessary, Angelo?" she asked, tying on her black headband.

Angelo shrugged with and a wicked grin crossed his face. "Probably not; but it sure was fun."

Karai rolled her eyes. "What do you have planned for today?"

"Master Shredder wants me to run a few errands, which will take all day; but tonight we'll see if my brothers will come out and _play_."

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><p><em>By errands, he means Shredders criminal dirty-work.<em>

_The training thing didn't go as serious as I wanted it to go, so instead this will be a 'mild' practice run._


	8. Two on One

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

_**By the way, this is for Epicenter And Rose(Note to Rose, read the reviews Epicenter has, he/she has a few notes for you);**_

_**Angelo: *being group hugged by Epicenter and Rose, he looks away but his eyes are tearing* You annoying FF females will not make me talk...**_

_**Epicenter and Rose; *hug him tighter* You need a hug...**_

_**Angelo; *his eyes tear more and his 'tough foot goon' attitude starts to break down a bit, but not by much* Oh god not again...I might kill you both later.**_

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><p>"Only two of them? Damn, that's disappointing." Angelo hissed. Currently he was standing on top of a gargoyle on the side of some city building he didn't bother studying, but the gargoyle above him cast shadows that hid him from view.<p>

He knew midnight was around the time his brothers would patrol the city, he was watching them. Unfortunately, it was only Don and Leo on this patrol. Angelo figured it was because he had injured Raph enough that he wouldn't be able enough to join patrol. That or they were protecting him from Angelo. He was disappointed he couldn't get to Raph right away, but he anticipated this and had a plan.

Leaping to the next building he followed them and waited for the right chance to strike. The right chance to strike came a few buildings ahead; at the widely flat root of a tall building. Smirking, Angelo threw a few smoke pellets at their feet.

Leo and Don stopped abruptly when a thick haze of smoke appeared around them. "What the Shell?" they said in unison. Leo suddenly felt someone approaching and he managed to use his katana, just in time, to guard both him and Donnie from the strike of a spear.

In a flash Don whipped out his Bo staff and used it to push the spear – and their assailant away. Being trained as ninja, they were able to easily see their surroundings even in smoke or the dark. Even in smoke as thick as this they could see a familiar dark shape running right at them. Hooking his elbow around Dons, Leo leapt into the air, which saved them both from a nasty strike from the spear.

The two of them landed outside of the smoke cloud. They coughed from the smoke inhalation

"Is that who I think it is?" Donnie asked with a wheeze. He stared into the smoke cloud and prayed the highest force in the universe that for once he was wrong

"We're about to find out." Leo replied and pointed at the dissipating smoke cloud where the dark shape of their assailant was becoming clearer as it moved closer to them.

Angelo stepped out of the haze, the smoke around him gave him a more spooky and dramatic appearance. Leo let his eyes trail the younger turtle; Angelo looked even more serious than last time, as he didn't bear an amused grin this time, his face was dead and straight. His narrowed eyes were about as dead calm as his face, but this time there was a bright red line on the bottom lid of his eye that made his eyes look like they were bleeding which added a 'hardcore' affect to his appearance.

"Nice night, isn't it?" Angelo asked blankly and flicked his in the direction of the moon. "Perfect for a two-on-one battle." His voice rose to a growl. His bloodshot eyes narrowed and he held out his _Jumonji-Yari _in both of his hands on an offensive stance.

"Mikey…" Donnie said softly, he hoped he could reason with his sibling "We don't want to fight you." It seemed to have worked because Angelo looked to the floor, contemplating.

Angelo looked up again; to Leo and Don's horror an evilly amused grin had twisted onto his face "Too bad." Was all he had to say before he lunged at his brothers.

"Move!" Leo hissed and tackled Don, who was in shock, out of the way of Angelo's _Jumonji-Yari. _They rolled on the ground but flipped back onto their feet soon after.

Leo held out his Katana in a threatening way "Mikey, we're giving you one last chance; stop this, or we'll have to fight you." He threatened in the same tone of voice he uses when he lectures Raph.

But it seemed his threat wasn't a very good one Angelo grinned more insanely "Good! That's exactly what I came here for!" He called out and leapt at Leo with his _Jumonji-Yari._

Leo pushed himself foreword and crossed his Katana, efficiently blocking Angelo. Both just kept pushing at each other.

The blue-masked turtle said "Tell me why you're acting like this! We're your brothers, Mikey! We can help you, you can trust us!"

They pushed themselves apart for a second, only to strike each other again, this time Leo's swords being pushed against Angelo's weapon which was set a horizontal-defense position.

"Brothers…." Angelo whispered the word, his eyes hardened and went icy "No…I can't trust a brother again….Never again." He whispered, his voice was barely audible. Leo hardly heard him.

"Mikey…." Leo whispered in a gentle tone to the turtle he loved "Tell me what happened, I can understand."

For some reason, Angelo just _snapped. _

Angelo's eyes went as wide as they would go, but his pupils shrunk. His body shook violently in angry tremors. "YOU WOULD _NEVER_ UNDERSTAND! I WON'T TALK! YOU CAN'T MAKE ME!" He roared and slashed at Leo violently with the spear-tip of his _Jumonji-Yari_, a few times the spear managed to cut at Leo's skin.

With a swift sweep and strike of his weapon, Angelo disarmed Leo of his Katana; making them fly a few feet away and clatter to the ground. Donnie could only watch in frozen shock. Don had always been the pacifist of the family, though he would do anything to protect his brothers in battle. But in a battle like this…..He couldn't bring himself to fight Mikey, even to help Leo. Don was uncertain of what to do.

Before Leo could make a move to get his swords, Angelo put his weapon back to the strap on his shell and took out his _chigiriki. _Angelo spun the weight-and-chain wildly, swinging constantly at Leo. Without his swords, Leo could only dodge or throw punches, which Angelo blocked with the metal bands on his wrists.

Leo ducked down and used a sweep-kick to try and trip him, but Angelo used that opportunity to do a no-handed cartwheel over Leo's crouched body and landing behind him. Leo didn't have time to whirl around; Angelo struck him on the side of his head with the weight on his _chigiriki._

Leo fell to his side, his vision was blocked by the white stars of pain, but he wasn't unconscious. He was numbly aware of Angelo getting rope (From somewhere in his uniform) and tying his hands behind his back. He couldn't really react until the black-masked turtle dragged him, but his head hurt too much for him to do anything besides squirm. Angelo made Leo sit against the rising door on center of the rooftop.

He could only watch as Angelo approached Don, who was slowly backing away with his Bo Staff out in front of him in defense. "Drop your weapon, Donnie." Angelo comanded, his voice may still have been cold and monotone, but there was an edge of an emotion that Leo couldn't identify. Donnie froze for a second, but he sighed and dropped his Bo Staff in submission.

Angelo didn't hesitate in tying Donnie and sitting him next to Leo.

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><p><em>Oooh, What's Angelo going to do with them, whats the next part of his plan? Read, review; get the next chapter and find out!<em>


	9. The Mongoose and the Cobra

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

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><p>The throbbing in Leo's head was like a hammer constantly tapping at his brain; things would be bright and loud one minute, only to be hazy and inaudible the next. For a ninja, a shifting of senses like that was torment. Leo hazily realized that Angelo had taken his Shell Cell.<p>

Angelo pressed the button that made the Shell Cell flick open all the way and pressed a few buttons, only to place it in the middle of the rooftop.

"What are you doing?" Donnie asked with a gulp, his soft-spoken voice actually soothed Leo's head for a moment.

Leaning his shell against the wall where Donnie and Leo were sitting against, Angelo shrugged "I sent a distress signal to Raphael." A amused grin twisted on his face again in a way that made Don wonder if this really was their little brother.

"Mikey…" Don whispered.

"Stop calling me that, it's Angelo now." Angelo snarled, the gruff sound pounded against Leo's brain and he could only wince.

"No, you're Mikey; you're our brother and you always have been, and always will be." Don insisted, Angelo glared at him; for a moment a unknown emotion swam in his blue-gray eyes but it flicked away.

The younger turtle crossed his arms "Fine, call me that all you want; but if you think it changes anything, your delusional." He muttered, his voice seemed rougher than usually, as if the words he spoke were sandpaper that rubbed against his throat as he spoke them.

Leo closed his eyes and could only listen to their conversation.

"What happened to you, how hard did the Shredder brainwash you? Mikey, don't listen to what he tells you!" Donnie told him, you could hear the venom dripping in his voice when he said 'the Shredder'.

Angelo started to chuckle insanely "Oh my - Ha-ha! - Do you actually think the Shredder kidnapped me and forced me to be one of his goons?"

"Wha…Did you join him on your own freewill?"

"Yes and **no** Donnie, lets leave it at that."

"Whatever it is Karai is saying to poison your mind – you are not her brother, she is using you Mikey!"

"Shut up!" Angelo yelled, his voice raised in defense of his adopted sibling "You don't know Karai like I do! You think you do, but you don't! She _saved_ me, Donnie! If it wasn't for her, I would have jumped off of a building a long time ago and rotted in an alley somewhere! And it's all Raph's fault, not Karai's!"

"Tell me what he did, Mikey!"

Leo started to drift in and out of consciousness so he could only hear tidbits of their conversation that was soon lost in his disoriented mind; he could only acknowledge that Angelo was refusing to tell Donnie anything. It hurt Leo's heart, seeing Mikey like this – and Donnie actually failing at consoling their altered brother. To see someone you love – in two ways – change for the worse so drastically, is the worst feeling you can imagine.

His heart heavy in his chest, Leo unwillingly fell to a pained unconsciousness, his mind void of all else except painful throbbing.

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><p>"What the – Are you <em>smoking?<em>" Donnie asked Mikey in shock as turtle in mention brought out a cigarette and lighting it.

"_No_ Donatello, I'm lighting a cigarette and breathing it in because I'm absolutely _not _smoking." Angelo retorted sarcastically and put it to his lips, truthfully he was smoking this time just to see how Donnie would react. "Why, does it surprise you?"

"I'm going to have to say yes."

"Ph, do you think my voice got like this on its own?" Angelo said with a roll of his eyes and flicked the cigarette away when he saw a familiar figure heading towards them a few buildings away. Angelo crouched next to Donnie and lowered his mask to use it as a gag, Donnie struggled but he was held down too firmly by his brother. With Donnie quiet, Angelo hid in the shadow of the roof door-wall.

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><p>Raph came to the building and looked around in confusion; where was Don and Leo? Had he traced the distress call right? Raph was about to bring out his Shell Cell, but before he could he noticed Leo's own Shell cell in the center of the building.<p>

Strange, why was it there? Raph jerked his head around in search of his brothers and saw both Donnie and Leo sitting against a wall – Don was moving, struggling even, but Leo was still.

"What the – Donnie! Leo!" He shouted and ran to them, when he got close he realized that they were both tied up, and Leo was unconscious.

"MPH! MPH!" Donnie yelled threw the gag, seemingly trying to tell him something.

"Donnie, what is it? Who did dis ta you?" Raph asked and frantically pulled Don's mask away from his mouth.

"LOOK OUT!" Don managed to yell before a shadow fell over them and Raph was tackled from above.

Angelo jumped from the top of the roof-door and tackled Raph. They rolled around before they jumped apart. Raph held out his sai's and Angelo his _chigiriki. _They circled each other, Raph, even though he still didn't know what Angelo was capable of, didn't lose his confidence; he reminded himself that this was Mikey and he knew all of his strengths and weakness's.

"I thought da air went cold." Raph taunted, though he was a little creeped out by Angelo's bleeding-looking eyes, which looked even more intimidating when he narrowed them.

"So, tell me you bastard; do you remember how you dishonored us both?" Angelo hissed his stance similar to a cobra ready to strike.

"I have no idea what the shell your so upset about; but I'm gonna find out, even if I hafta beat it outta ya!" And Raph was the mongoose; ready to fight the cobra to the death.

"That's just like you! Trying to _beat_ your problems away. Let me tell you hothead; I'm one problem you can't beat away this time!"

Before they could attack each other, someone jumped between them, making them freeze.

"STOP THIS!"

Angelo took a step back in shock and nearly dropped his _chigiriki _For a moment, his eyes turned azure again, he looked like a scared child, he looked like _Mikey_. He managed to whisper one word before _Angelo_ returned.

"F-Father?"

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><p><em>Thats right! Master Splinter to the rescue! Will he be able to console Angelo? Review, get the next chapter and find out!<em>


	10. The right choice

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

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><p>But <em>Mikey <em>was gone in a flash and Angelo was back full force; he stood his ground and narrowed his eyes but other than that he made no move to attack Master Splinter.

"What, you need dear old daddy to protect you now, Raph?" Angelo taunted and flicked his head at Master Splinter. Don realized Angelo had put his _chigiriki _back on his belt; so he wasn't going to fight Master Splinter.

"Michaelangelo…..My son." Master Splinter called to his youngest in a gentle tone. Angelo twitched but did not reply.

"I have missed you, my son. As have your brothers." Master Splinter carried on "My son, you and Donatello were the most gentle of your brothers; what has happened to that caused you to ally yourself with evil and become darker in the heart?"

"I'm not telling you." Angelo told him flatly, crossed his arms and turned his head to the side to glare at nothing in particular.

Raph took advantage of Angelo being distracted; he snuck over to Don and helped him up "You okay bro?" he asked in concern.

Don felt anger spike in his blood, the heat of anger rose into his voice as he venomously spat out; "What the _fuck _did you do to our brother!"

Being a teenage mutant ninja turtle, who's been in space, whose time traveled and been to different dimensions; not many things can surprise or scare you, Raph especially. But hearing Donnie out of all turtles swear with such venom _scared him shitless_ almost as much as Mikey's 're-appearance' did.

Raph's jaw hung open agape in surprise.

"FUCKING ANSWER ME DAMNIT!" Don yelled, his anger getting the better of his control, Raph felt as if he'd shrunken next to Don.

"I-I don't know….." The dark green turtle answered honestly and swept his amber gaze to the floor.

"I'LL **BEAT** THE FUCKING TRUTH OUT OF YOU IF HAVE TO!" Don yelled and started kicking Raph because his arms were still tied behind his back. Don just keep trying to kick Raph, who kept moving back and dodging, he was too enraged to notice they were getting closer to the edge of the roof. Raph lucked out; even though he didn't notice they were near the edge of the roof, he moved to the side just in time instead of backing up.

Don was not that lucky.

"Ahh-! SHELL!" Don screamed as he plummeted to the ground; unable to do anything because his arms were tied behind his back. The night _could _have ended with Don splattered on the concrete, but no it didn't end that way.

Raph was too shocked to move, but someone else wasn't; he watched in surprise as Angelo ran off the roof and dived towards Don. When Angelo caught up to Donnie, he vied his arm around Donnie's chest (under his arms and around) with one arm and with the other arm he whipped out one of his _chigiriki _and swung the chain around the railing of a fire escape.

Angelo held Donnie tightly as they dangled; he hissed slightly in discomfort because of the arm holding onto the _chigiriki _being pulled by the excess weight of both his and Donnie's body.

"Y-You _idiot!_" Angelo hissed "Were you _trying _to get killed? Did you really not notice you were on the edge of a _roof? _Fuck, how are you the genius?"

Don was both stunned and happy that Angelo had saved his life; Mikey was still in their! There was still hope!

"Mikey, thank you." Don whispered gratefully.

Angelo turned his head and snorted "Whatever." Before swinging their bodies to where they were whipped onto the fire-escape.

"Mikey…" Don called as Angelo turned away.

"And Donnie; Tell Leo," Angelo said and turned his head back at Don "That when he chose not to join the Shredder; _he made the right choice._" Don saw soul-wrenching turmoil etched on Angelo's face.

But he only saw it for a second before Angelo leapt off of the fire escape and disappeared into the darkness of the city night without a trace; leaving behind a puzzled Don, an unconscious Leo, a confused Raph and a grieving Master Splinter.

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><p><em>Oooh, Angelo saved Don's life! Is there hope for him after all?<em>

_By the way, Donnie saying he'd 'beat' the truth out of Raph, that was for you Rose!_

_Next Chapter; Raph finds out the truth!_


	11. The Truth

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

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><p>Angelo curled up on his bed and cursed that Karai was not at the manor today but had a businuess meeting to attend to. The <em>dreams<em> were comming tonight he could tell, he didn't want to sleep but his body refused to obey.

Tears squeezed out of his eyes as he shut them and was forced into the twisted world of his nightmares.

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><p>"How the shell is meditating supposed to help us?" Raph demanded, shifting uncomfortably in his sitting position.<p>

Right now he, Master Splinter, Leo and Donnie were in circle around a single white meditation candle; the lit candle was the only source of light in the lair because Splinter had turned off all of them off.

"Raphael," Splinter warned sternly and paused for his son to listen "Your brother is very angry and spiteful; but all of that anger and spite is directed towards you _you._ He was not afraid to be open about how much he wanted you to pay."

"Yeah," Don interjected "And he only ever seemed to want to attack _you; _he only ambushed me and Leo to trap you! If it had been you falling off of that building instead of me; he would have let you fall!"

"Raph, you were the last person to see him before he disappeared." Leo stated and winced at the slight throb his head still tormented him with "You told us you guys had an argument and then a fight; you pinned him down and said you passed out, right?"

"Yeah; I think Mikey pinched the nerve on my neck or something." Raph recalled.

"Something happened during that fight; Raph, you can't remember all the details because you were fighting and your never in your right mind when you get violent – You have to meditate and think back to then. Use all your senses to cover up for your lost memory." Leo instructed and closed his eyes.

"Only you can recall these things, Raphael." Splinter told him "But we will be offering you all the spiritual support we can."

Raph sighed and closed his eyes and well and forced all of his attention to that day through meditation. Silence fell upon the room.

Several minutes passed before Raph could see the fuzzy mental imagine of the liar from that day. Several more minutes passed before it was clear.

* * *

><p><em>Raph blinked; he found himself visiting the past in spiritual form. He saw himself in rage, swinging punches as Mikey who was dodging the blows and teasing him for it in a playful way.<em>

_Raph's heart sank seeing how Mikey was; that big dumb goofy grin, they way he snickered with his teeth and he kept dodging, the playful mischief gleaming in his azure-blue eyes. He couldn't believe how that Mikey could suddenly become so cold and psychotic as Angelo._

_"Oh come on Raph! Your getting slow!" Mikey snickered and ducked to dogde a punch. While the past Raph growled, the spiritual Raph smiled slightly; he'd actually missed Mikey's annoying surfer-accented voice. _

_"AHHH!" Mikey yelled when he tripped over one of Raph's small weights that seemed to be laying around in the living room for some reason. The past Raph took this chance to tackle Mikey and pin him to the ground. And kept Mikey on the ground by using his sai's to pin both Mikey's wrists to the ground._

_Raph flinched when he saw his past self wail on Mike brutally like no tomorrow. Mikey kept shouting 'oww!'._

_"What's so serious about dis?" Raph wondered aloud since nothing could hear him "I've beaten on Mikey worse than this before."_

_But then things went dark and Raph time-skipped to the memory of when he woke up._

_"Owww…Shell, my head." Past Raph moaned and rubbed his temples from the headache that plagued his brain._

_Spiritual Raph looked around and saw that his past self was in the same spot; with the sai still stabbed to the ground in fact but no Mikey so he had escaped. 'Have to use my senses' Raph thought and used his first one; sight._

_His sai had blood on the middle blade so Mikey had probably cut his wrists trying to slip them out. But there was also blood on the floor. Raph remembered how he had disregarded the blood and cleaned it later._

_Next sense; Hearing, no sounds, no sound of a sobbing Mikey nearby so he had left the lair while Raph was unconscious._

_Nothing. Next sense; Smell. Raph inhaled sharply and did indeed catch a very obvious scent in the air. He remembered how he had crinkled his snout before because of it but ignored it._

_Maybe that was the key; now, the scent was familiar, he had smelled it before some time after that day. But where?_

_Raph thought long and hard before he traced it back to the day he had visited Casey and found April and him talking in the kitchen, both looked tired. The smell had come from Casey's room._

_When the realization hit, the memories flooded into his brain._

* * *

><p>Leo snapped out of meditation when he heard a sharp gasp from his amber-eyed brother. Splinter and Donnie also stared at Raph; who was pale with horror.<p>

Raph suddenly got up and ran to the bathroom, Don and Leo trailed after him to find Raph vomiting in the toilet having not bothered to shut the door.

After puking his guts out, Raph rose shakily and leaned against the sink for support; his face that he glared at through the bathroom mirror showed disgust and hate; but it was **self-**hate and **self-**disgust.

"Oh my god…Oh my god…I'm a monster….I'm so sorry…I'm so sorry…" Raph muttered under his breath. Leo and Don stood there as Raph showed a rare display of tears; he got onto his hands on knees on the floor and just started sobbing shamelessly, mumbling incoherent things over and over.

"Raph….?" Don called out to his red-masked brother, only to get a louder sob in reply.

"Stay away from me Donnie; I'm a monster. I'm the worse brother in the world." Raph warned him, his voice and body trembling with shock.

"Raph…What did you remember?" Leo asked cautiously and calmly, but on the inside he was practically screaming the question that had been haunting them since they 'found' Mikey.

"Guys…I'm so sorry….I'm so sorry….I didn't mean it!" Raph cried on the edge of hyperventilating.

"Raphael!" Leo warned more sternly. "What did you do!"

Nothing could prepare Leo, or Donnie, or anyone, for the answer.

Raph was shaking and his voice was uneven but he managed to tell them; "Guys….I raped our baby bro."

* * *

><p><em>Dun dun DUN!<em>

_Yeah...thats what happened; bet no one saw this comming. More explaination in the next chapter._


	12. It all comes out

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

* * *

><p>Donnie and Leo stared at Raph in shock; he….<em>what? <em>In the shock their minds couldn't process the thoughts as fast as they wish they could. Even quick-minded Donnie was frozen on the spot for a long period of time, his eyes wider than an owls.

When they were to themselves again it wasn't shock they felt (Well, they were surprised but that's not the point) it was complete, utter, hellfire _rage. _It was Donnie who expressed it first in a manner like this;

"You son of a bitch..." Donnie hissed out lowly and slowly before he took out his Bo staff and proceeded to beat Raph with it "HOW THE HELL COULD YOU DO THAT TO OUR LITTLE BROTHER! I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU!"

Leo was still too stunned to do anything besides curl his hands into a tight fist; he'd always known Raph to do stupid things whenever he was angry but…. _rape_ their little brother? That was inexcusable.

Even though he felt very angry at Raph, and really sorry for Mikey he couldn't help the new emotion he felt; jealousy and possessiveness, something Leo very rarely ever felt. Mikey wasn't his mate or anything, but he loved Mikey and (by force) Raph had been his first (It wouldn't be hard to tell if Mikey had actually 'done it' before) when it should have been Leo!

Raph didn't attempt to fight Donnie back; he lay on the floor and let Donnie beat him with his Bo staff like he was a piñata. Leo let it go on for a little while longer before he decided it was time to stop his genius brother from actually killing Raphael (Before Leo got a hold of him...).

"Donatello." Leo said sternly and put his hand on Don's shoulder "That's enough!"

"Back off!" Don growled and used his Bo staff to trip Leo. When Leo fell Don dropped his Bo staff and full-body attacked Raphael; using the most painful fighting tactics he could think of; traditional _and _dirty styles alike.

"I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU!" Don shouted and clocked Raph in the face

Leo rolled back on his feet and tackled Don; they rolled on the floor in flurry before Leo had him pinned, but Don still kept fighting him back to get to Raph.

"Don! Get a hold of yourself!" Leo commanded, but Don kept thrashing.

"NO! LOOK WHAT HE DID TO MIKEY! OUR LITTLE BROTHER…DID YOU SEE HIM RAPH! DID YOU SEE WHAT HAPPENED TO MIKEY BECAUSE OF YOU!" Don continued to rant, tears started to form at the corners of his brown eyes.

"Donnie….I'm sorry….I don't know what to say….I was drunk…."

Raph had been _drunk _while they were gone? Was that why he hadn't remembered? Don ignored that comment and raved on.

"HE LOVED YOU, RAPH, HE REALLY **LOVED **YOU!" Don shouted at their red-masked brother, Leo and Raph were both taken aback "The day he disappeared…" Don's voice wasn't as loud anymore but he kept it harsh "I took Leo on the supply run with me so he could tell you his feelings, Raph! How could you?"

Silence fell.

Leo felt his mind blank out all thoughts the words 'He loved you, Raph' kept repeating in his brain like a broken record; Mikey had…Loved Raph? Leo now felt even more anger and jealousy towards Raph; anger because Raph had raped Mikey when said turtle loved him and jealousy because Mikey loved _Raph_ out of all of them…

"I…I didn't know…" Raph said softly and looked at his hands with wide eyes; clearly shocked at how the younger felt about him, and what he'd done. Somehow that pissed Leo off more; he should have let Donnie kill him…

Wait….

His face grew hot when he realized he was still on top of Don; Leo shot up as fast as he could and swept invisible dust off of plastron. Donnie took the chance to tackle Raph again to make more bruises.

"ENOUGH!" A stern voice commanded, the turtle brothers turned and saw Master Splinter whose expression was empty but a mix of anger and surprise was evident in his gray eyes. "Donatello, cease attacking your brother at once."

"He _deserves_ it, Father!" Don growled and glared at his dark-green skinned brother "He-!"

"Has dishonored your brother in the worse way possible, I know." Master Splinter finished, his voice was even with an edge of anger about his youngest son not just being violated…but by another one of his sons.

"Raphael, kneel." Master Splinter demanded. Raph shakily got out from under Don and kneeled in front of his sensei. Splinter waited a moment before he spoke. "Raphael, never in my life have I ever been so _disappointed _in you" His words were strict and Raph flinched "I have always known that you were angry, and never afraid to both question and defy authority; but I expected even you to be weary of the dangers of alcohol."

Raph looked to the floor in shame.

"You have dishonored yourself, this family and more importantly your brother; in his time of turmoil he has turned to an enemy for closure and because of that he has turned against us; he is a constant threat and danger to our safety." Splinter continued.

"Master Splinter, Mikey he-" Don said but Splinter cut him off.

"Donatello I am very much aware of your brother loving Raphael in a non-brotherly way." Splinter admitted "I was aware of it long before Michaelangelo was; I believe that that is way he acted the in the childish way he did, to set himself apart from the rest of you and be more easily noticed." His wise gray eyes fell on Raph "And Raphael, I am also aware you felt the same."

Leo blinked stupidly; Raph had loved Mikey, and Mikey loved him too? Oh _shell, _did that mean Leo didn't even have a chance with Mikey in the first place? A emotion akin to depression settled at the bottom of Leo's heart.

"I don't-!" Raph argued but Splinter silenced him with a glare.

"Do not try to lie to me, my son; I dreaded something like this happening as you all became older, I know that biologically you all yearn for mates of your own kind. Over time I have learned to accept it, for I love all of you and accept you for who you are."

"Sensei," Leo said "what about Mikey?"

The gray rat looked to all of them before settling his gaze on his red-masked son "Raphael, the only one who can work this out with Michaelangelo is you."

"But Masta' Splinta'! He wants to _kill _me!"

"No, my son. He only believes he wants to kill you; there is a darkness that surrounds his heart, but like any dark fog, it can be lifted."

Raph looked up to his rat master; confusion in his amber eyes; he up to his father for answers, something he could do to make things right again.

"Mikey's still in there," Don offered "he could have let me die, but he saved me instead. He could have easily cracked Leo's skull open; I saw him, he hesitated, he struck Leo with less force than he could have. He chose _not _to fight master Splinter. Mikey's still in there, we just need to find him."

Leo, Raph and Master Splinter thought a moment before nodding.

"And besides, I don't think he's _really _loyal to the Shredder; Leo, he had something to tell you." Don continued.

"What did he have to say?"

"He said that when you chose not to join the Shredder, you made the right choice."

* * *

><p><em>Well...How will things play out when Angelo and Raph meet again? What's Karai's side of the story? <em>

_Read, review, get the next chapter and find out!_


	13. Angelo's Nightmares

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

* * *

><p><em>Mikey was practically bouncing on his feet when he got out of his bed. He was so excited! The excitement spread out through his entire body, making even the tips of his fingers twitch with anticipation. <em>

_Today he was going to tell Raphael how he felt! _

_That's right; Mikey loved Raph and no one except for Donnie knew. And said olive-green terrapin had made sure Mikey and Raph would be alone by dragging Leo with him on the supply run. Don had been the one who had consoled Mikey when he found out his feelings and told him that it wasn't wrong; something about incest being common among animals and how they, being Mutant Turtles, can only be attracted to other Mutant turtles, which there were only four of in existance. He also told Mikey that none of them were biologically related either._

_Mikey smiled thinking about his supportive brother; Donnie was the best big brother ever!_

_Mikey peeked into the living room and saw his red-masked older brother crashed out on the couch, then checked and made sure Donnie and Leo were gone. Giddily Mikey almost skipped over to Raph._

_But when he got close – he found himself frozen in a sudden wave of nervousness and self-consciousness; what if Raph rejected him? What if he felt disgusted with him? What if he never wanted to be around Mikey ever again?_

_Mikey took a step back and told himself mentally to be brave; he couldn't keep his emotions bottled up too long. The orange-masked turtle stood there frozen like a statue for about fifteen minutes before he decided to go out for a while to gather up his courage._

_Leaving a note on the fridge in case if Raph woke up while he was gone; Mikey grabbed his skateboard and ran out of the lair to make good fun out of the twisted labyrinths of the New York sewer system. _

_About two hours later…_

_"Whooohooo!" Mikey shouted as he re-entered the lair on his skateboard; he glanced at the couch and saw his dark-green skinned brother wasn't lying there anymore. In fact, he wasn't in the living room either._

_"I'm hooommmmeeee!" Mikey called out, his announcement only getting silence as reply._

_Mikey frowned and left his skateboard by the door. Where was Raph? "Hey Raph? Where are you? RAPH!" He called as he walked towards the living room._

_"I swear nothin' hurts my head more…" came an irritated Brooklyn drawl. Mikey whipped his head and saw Raph coming out of the kitchen with a drinking can in one hand._

_Mikey's was about to smile and greet Raph but his eyeridges instead knitted together in concern. An acrid scent reeked from Raph's breath. And not just that, but he looked very unfocused ('Well, more than usual' Mikey thought with a mental snicker) "Raph? Is that beer?"_

_"Yeah." Raph said with a shrug and decided not to hide anything "Me and Case got really, really wasted last night." _

_"Raph, your only eighteen!" Mikey said and yanked the can out of his hand "Besides, I don't think it's a good idea to drink alcohol in the morning with an empty stomach to cure a hang-over!"_

_Raph growled and reached for the can, but Mikey swiftly moved back. "Give it back, Mikey." He threatened and popped his knuckles in warning._

_"No! Raph, you shouldn't drink right after you wake up after getting drunk all night!" Mikey retorted and looked at Raph with all the seriousness he could bring up._

_"Oww! Damnit!" Raph hissed in pain and put his palm to his forehead to sooth the pounding headache that tormented his brain._

_"Hmph. That'll teach you to get drunk at eighteen." Mikey scowled; for a moment he felt as if he was acting like Leo, lecturing Raph like that._

_"What, you saying your smarter den me and make betta' decistions?" Raph slurred loudly in a sudden burst of anger._

_Mikey raised an eye ridge in confusion; where had that come from? He replied cockily "No Raph, you just always make stupid choices!"_

_"Why you-!" Raph didn't finish his sentence, instead he swung a right hook at Mikey._

_Mikey ducked and grinned and decided to mess with Raph for a while. For several minutes Raph would throw blows at him, Mikey would dodge each one and taunt him for it._

_Blue eyes twinkling in mischief, Mikey snickered and said "Oh come on Raph! Your getting slow!" he teased playfully. Raph did not return the 'playful' gesture; he growled and threw another punch which Mikey dodged like the other ones._

_"AHHH!" Mikey shouted whenever he backed up and tripped over one of Raph's weights which seemed to have somehow rolled out of the dojo and into the living room._

_Mikey landed on his shell, and not a second later Raph was pinning him down and grabbed his wrists. Mikey gulped when Raph used his sai to pin his wrists to the ground._

_Then the blows rained on him like fist-shaped meteors, Mikey kept crying out 'oww' from the pain of Raph's usual display of brutality. But he'd gotten worse beatings from Raph before and endured the pain. Mikey locked his gaze with Raph's and saw there was red edging in his amber eyes and it scared him, Raph was mad…No not just mad, he was mad __and__ the alcohol was beginning to take effect._

_Oh crap – Raph was going to beat him to death this time! Raph was bad enough when he was mad, but Mikey had never been around Raph when he was both angry and drunk. Under both influences with his low self-control, nothing would stop the older of the two to beat Mikey to death._

_If Mikey had known that it wasn't going to end that way – he would have chosen being brutally beaten to death._

_Mikey was confused when the beating suddenly stopped and Raph grabbed onto his ankles and forced himself between Mikey's legs, grinding their lower bodies against each other. The orange-masked turtle gasped when he felt Raph suddenly grab his tail and force it up. What was Raph doing now?_

_"Raph, what are you-!" Mikey asked in confusion but was cut off by his own sharp cry of pain and surprise when he felt like he was being 'stabbed' in his tail hole. Mikey shockingly realized that Raph had entered him and was thrusting in and out of him as fast and hard as he could go, grunting in ecstasy. _

_Mikey kept biting his lip so he wouldn't scream; pain…Horrible, inhuman pain coursing through his insides…Oh god, this hurt so bad. He felt his inner walls rip apart. He knew very well that everyone's first time was supposed to be painful…But it was extra painful for him. The sea-green turtle shut his eyes tightly and tried to separate his mind and body to escape that horror that he was being raped by his older brother._

_But he found himself unable to do that; the pain was too great to ignore, even as a ninja he wasn't trained for pain like this. He grinded his teeth together so hard he felt as though they would shatter. Mikey's mind went numb when he felt something warm run down from his tail hole…Blood? He was bleeding?_

_Mikey couldn't stop the sob from escaping from him, his heart shattered; the day he was going to tell Raph his feelings….and he was being raped by the very turtle he loved. This was punishment of some kind, for being sick and twisted, for loving his own brother._

_Tears poured out of Mikey's eyes like a river when Raph started to go at a faster and harder pace that hurt much more, Mikey shut his eyes and forced himself not to scream… 'Do not scream, do not scream, do not scream' he continually chanted in his head._

_He felt pain in his sides and grudgingly realized Raph had been holding onto his sides and was now scratching with his nails sinking in._

_"R-Raph…" Mikey called, trying to snap his brother out of it, his voice was shaky from his pain and crying "please stop…" but his pleads fell to deaf ears, Raph kept slamming into him._

_Mikey turned his head to the side to not look at Raph. He softy kept sobbing from the internal pain._

_It seemed to go on forever - when in fact it had only been five minutes – before it ended. Mikey shuttered when Raph suddenly stopped and started jerking while moaning in pleasure. Something hot rushed into Mikey and it burned his bleeding insides._

_That time, he couldn't help but scream._

_Raph stayed connected in him for a couple seconds before he slowly pulled out, Mikey was still trembling and crying when he did. Raph tried to push himself up, but instead collapsed on top of Mikey whilst panting._

_Mikey was terrified – truly terrified – of Raph now, especially since he was on top of him like that, he was afraid Raph was still intoxicated and would…Mikey snapped out of his thoughts when he heard the familiar sound of Raph snoring (like a chainsaw…)and realized the amber-eyes terripin had passed out._

_'I gotta get out of here!' Mikey thought frantically and shook his wrists violently to free them from the sai, he hissed when his wrists cut against the sai blade, but he didn't care; he needed to get out!_

_When Mikey finally got his wrists free he squirmed under Raph to get out from under him without waking him up. The thought of Raph waking up sent Mikey's panic into overdrive; he practically dived out from under Raph. _

_Shaken with the shock of 'did this really happen?', Mikey looked between his legs, his breath caught in his throat when he saw all the blood and __**white stuff **__running down his legs from his abused tail hole; that made him realize that this was all real, not a bad nightmare (Well, Technically this is Angelo's bad nightmare but it's also a memory..)._

_Then, all the emotional pain hit; the trauma in his mind, the shattering in his heart. Raph…His brother…his protector…He really…?_

_A sob ripped out of Mikey's throat; he loved Raph so much…he really was sick…why did he still…when Raph…?_

_Mikey ran out of the lair as fast as he could dispite his burning insides, tears were streaking down the side of his face. What would he do? What would Master Splinter think? What would Leo and Donnie think?_

_No…No! No one will ever know…They would be disgusted in him…this was all his fault…he should have never even thought of admitting his feeling to Raph…Never._

_Never…_

* * *

><p>Angelo's eyes flew open and his fingers clutched the sheet of his bed, he was desperately clawing at the covers from the tremors of his nightmare. Gasping and panting Angelo was thrown into more of his nightmares.<p>

* * *

><p><em>Mikey was thrown against the wall; a sharp cry was forced out of him. The cuts and bruises on him stung almost as much as the words from the foot elite he was forced to fight with.<em>

_"Weakling!"_

_"No wonder you were violated! You couldn't fight back! "_

_"I bet he didn't try to fight back because he wanted it!"_

_He whimpered when he heard a **snap **and **clatter** as they broke his nunchoku...His weapons...Master Splinter wouldn't be pleased if he found out. It hurt him seeing the wepons he'd cherished for so long be broken in front of him, the wepons given to him by his father._

_Mikey weakly raised his head; half of his face was covered in blood which was why one of his eyes was closed. He gritted his teeth and tried to ignore them. They laughed._

_No, he hadn't wanted it!...He was too weak to fight Raph. He needed...To get stronger...Fight back...Prove them wrong..._

* * *

><p><em>Mikey fell to the ground, panting in pain and exhaustion, he looked up at the Shredder only to be kicked in the side.<em>

_"Everytime you look at me with those eyes, I'm going to have to hurt you…"_

_White-hot electricity ran through his entire body in currents._

_What was wrong with his eyes?_

* * *

><p><em>Mikey held a long pole in his hands; he was walking across the tightrope and had to force himself not to look down. They were improving his balance by scaring him not to tightrope was the length of a football field, many meters above the ground above the ground. The ground was covered in barbed wire, shattered glass and sharp metal.<em>

_He was halfway through the rope when the pole suddenly tipped, imbalancing him and hurtling his body to the ground._

_So much blood..._

* * *

><p><em>It was so dark…Mikey forced his other senses to heighten; the Shredder had forced him to get an injection in his eyes that would make him temporarily blind for two weeks.<em>

_Blows kept hitting him everywhere…So many sounds and vibrations coming from everywhere at once it was too difficult to find one opponent at a time._

_He tried striking one of them, but missed. More electricity ran through his body..._

_He was always so scared of the dark...But never more had he wanted to conquer it, stop the pain..._

* * *

><p><em>He hung from the shackles; his feet almost touched the floor; the tears he'd shred so many times still fell down his face.<em>

_"AHH!" He cried in pain when he felt another lash of a whip. More blood that felt warm, more pain that felt cold._

_"This is all because of your brother! He's the reason this happening to you…He's the reason you're here!"_

_Raph's fault…All Raph's fault…His fault..._

* * *

><p><em>"NOOO!" He shouted as he was pinned down by a foot ninja; he was getting so weak, Shredder hadn't given him food in over a week. It may have been the ninja pinning him down…But all Mikey saw was Raph…<em>

_Not again…Never again!_

_Rage flooded in his systems. Like an enraged animal Mikey broke his wrist free of the ninjas grip and slammed the side of his fist on the ninja's temple. The ninja yelled in pain and Mikey used the chance to steal the pair of shurikan from the ninja's pocket and stabbed them into the ninja's throat. _

_"Never again…" Mikey whispered in a monotone voice he'd never used before._

_He felt no grief or anything that's he'd just killed someone...The Shredder had finally broken him._

_He blamed Raphael for what he'd become...He would pay...Revenge..._

* * *

><p>"Angelo! Angelo! Wake up!...Oh No! Angelo! Don't worry, I'll get Chaplin…"<p>

* * *

><p>"What's wrong with him?"<p>

"I'm sorry Karai….I-It's getting worse"

"What? But he's taking the pills!"

"Yes, but those pills are for humans….I have yet to develop anything that could help him; I don't know that much about how his body works yet."

"What can we do?"

"Wait for him to wake up and pray untill then, my love."

* * *

><p><em>Yeah...Pretty sad huh? Who out there is crying for MikeyAngelo?_

_So this is what happened between him and Raph...Some things Karai will explain later, and the Shredder too. Note the other flashbacks of Angelo's nightmares were some of his training sessions, he always has nightmares about different ones and these were the ones he had nightmare of this time; some of his training sessions were worse than this and he'll recall them later. What was the electricity he kept feeling, you will find out later. __What about the pills Karai is talking about, what is Karai talking about? _

_In the next chapter, how will the others react to what Raph did? Probably not well._

_Read, review, get the next chapter and Find out!_


	14. Another Morning in the Foot

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

* * *

><p>Angelo awoke with a start; breathing in deeply he realized his face was sticky wet from warm tears and cold sweat; he winced when he rubbed his eyes and irritated the raw skin of his bottom eyelids. Getting up into a sitting position he glanced around the room.<p>

Wait, why was he in Karai's room?

She had probably caught him in the middle of his episode and being unable to wake him up had made up for it by putting him in her room.

Angelo growled while he reached into his pocket and glared at a small plastic bottle of pills like it was the source of his troubles. Angelo didn't get it, why didn't the pills work? Chaplin said they would work when he gave them to him; that red-headed nerd better not have lied to him.

Angelo rose from Karai's bed and carefully fixed up her bed to make up for how much he'd messed it up trashing in his sleep. He had to make sure there were no wrinkles or anything; Karai was a complete perfectionist and seeing things in disarray made her go nuts.

'_Like Leo,_' Angelo thought before shaking those thoughts away and reminding himself to stop thinking about them; last night's battle had been different, he couldn't fight Raphael because Splinter had appeared. Evil or not, Angelo still believed in Bushido and would not dishonor his father and sensei.

Evil…Angelo chuckled darkly at the thought; look at what he'd become, he'd long since accepted he was evil; only those evil can kill without remorse, only those evil can hurt their family, only those evil can have such a strong desire for revenge like Angelo.

With the bed made, Angelo left Karai's room; faintly wondering where she was, she usually stuck around until he woke up after his episodes. She was probably busy or decided to have breakfast with her lover Doctor Chaplin.

Angelo rolled his eyes as he continued down the hall to his own room; Love was a useless emotion that only caused drama and romance was pointless. Love was the kind of things humans made up to brainwash people to buy things for each other, and Angelo's former self had been foolish enough to believe it existed.

Look where the stupid fake emotion had gotten him…

Angelo pushed open his door and walked straight to the small closet the room offered to put on a clean Foot uniform, typically Angelo didn't sleep in his clothes but last night he had no control over it. Shedding the sleeveless shirt off, Angelo looked at himself in the mirror and looked away from all the scars he'd seen himself gain in his nightmares. He shred the trousers next and slipped into another Foot uniform. Putting on the clothes made Angelo think back to when his brothers and him made jokes of how clothes were for humans and how hard they were hard to move in. Wearing the uniform when he'd spent his entire life only wearing gear used to bug him, but he eventually got used to it.

Angelo ripped his black mask off; it was soaked in tears. Throwing the wet garment into the wastebasket Angelo took a spare black mask from the closet and tied it onto his face.

The young turtle made his way out of his room and was about to go to the dojo, but when he got there Hun told him that Shredder wanted to speak to him about something.

Muttering, Angelo equipped himself with his _chigiriki_ and _Jumonji-Yari _before he headed to the Shredder.

* * *

><p>"Kneel before me, Angelo."<p>

"My lord, you requested my presence?"

"Angelo, it had been days; when does your personal mission take full effect? My patience is wearing, has your loyalty returned to them."

"Do not believe that, Master Shredder! I am loyal only to you; my kinship with them is dead. As for my mission, there is nothing to worry about; My actions are much like a slow-acting poison, it infects them from the inside-out. They are tearing apart on the inside, and they will only notice it when it is far too late."

"Very well my son. You may leave."

"Thank you, my lord. Have you seen Karai?"

"I am afraid I have not; she left a while ago, having…. 'Business to attend to'"

* * *

><p>Leo walked out of Don's lab; he had received another check-up to make sure he hadn't sustained any damage from the blow he'd received from Mikey's <em>chigiriki. <em>There was no damage, his scull was a little bruised and Leo would be a little sensitive to loud noises for while, but other than tat he was all right.

Leo glared at Raph who was lying on the couch on his side; staring out into space with the look of regret and self-hatred still strong in his amber eyes.

Earlier, Splinter had announced Raphael would not receive punishment for his 'dishonorable act' (As Master Splinter had put it) until he had worked this out with Mikey. Normally, Leo would agree with his sensei; but he found that complete bullshit. Raph had raped their little brother, leading him to become 'darker' and work for the Shredder, and he wouldn't get punished for it until he somehow worked this out with Mikey.

How the Shell would Raph work this out with Mikey anyways? Walk up to him, say; '_Hey, sorry I raped ya bro, please stop workin' for the Shredda' while your at it, go back to how you used to be. Oh by the way, it turns out we both love each other_.' And all was good and well?

Yeah, _that _unrealistic.

"Homato Clan, I come foreword to speak with you." A female voice suddenly rang into their lair. Leonardo immediately took out his katana and held them in offensive stance. "Karai!" he spat.

Indeed it was Karai who stood at the entrance, next to her stood Chaplin who was fidgeting in fear at the sight of Leo.

Don came rushing out of his lab with his Bo staff. Raph didn't get up; he continued to stare blankly into space.

"What the Shell do you want, Karai?" Don demanded, doing a stance next to Leo.

"Was Mikey not enough for the Shredder? Do you want another one of us now too?" Leo growled.

Karai sighed "I bear no weapons, turtles." She told them "Because I have not come to fight with you, I have come to tell you how your brother became how he is now. I sensed that you know the first part; but I have come to tell you the rest."

* * *

><p><em>Next Chapter Karai explains MikeyAngelo's experiances in the Foot, the pills he has to take, the electricity, and how Karai and Angelo have become close._

_Read, review and get the next chapter!_

_Oh, and for the reviewers; (Because, well most of them wanted to kill Raph)_

**Raph: *being chased by angry readers and reviews* FOR DA LAST TIME! IT WAS ONLY A FANFIC! AND I WAS DRUNK!**

**Rose; *cussing Raph out in Spnaish, holds a torch in one hand and a baseball bat in the other***

**Epicenter; *Holding a torch and a hockeystick* GET BACK HERE YOU SON OF A BITCH! HOW DARE YOU HUIRT MIKEY!**

**UnderWaterUnicorn: *Holding two pitchforks* LET ME AT HIM!**

**Me; Guys, guys, guys! Wait, I need him for the rest of the fanfic.**

***Raph gets caught by the angry reviewers and gets practically mauled***

**Me;...On second thought *steps back and holds hands up* You guys just go ahead and uh...Vent...**


	15. Karai speaks: From Mikey to Angelo

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

* * *

><p>Karai and Chaplin sat in one sofa, both holding a cup that Master Splinter poured green tea into. Across from where they sat, Donnie and Leo sat on opposite sides of a different sofa so Master Splinter could sit between them. Raph had chosen to lean against a nearby wall and listen to the conversation but not be part of it.<p>

"Miss Oroku," Master Splinter greeted, breaking the long stretching silence "why is it you have come here?"

"I know Raphael has told you," Karai replied, looking down at her reflection in the tea "but he has only told you the first part of the story, I have come to tell you the rest."

"But why would you do that?" Leo asked, his brown eyes bore into Karai's green ones.

"You are his family, you deserve to know." Karai answered simply and took a small sip of her tea "And, seeing what Angelo has become, I am starting to question my own loyalty to my father; I have witnessed his true cruelty, but it took Angelo's suffering for me to see it."

"So him trying to kill us wasn't enough?" Don mumbled, Splinter sent him and glare.

"Miss Oroku, please tell us your side of the story." Splinter urged politely.

"It started over a year ago…"

* * *

><p><em>Karai wasn't sure why she was jumping the rooftops like this; maybe it was because she knew the turtles did it and she wanted to give it a try for herself. But Karai had chosen to go during daytime so she wouldn't run into them.<em>

_She wasn't sure what her relationship with the turtles was anymore – not long ago she had helped them defeat her father the Shredder whenever he tried to get rid of the turtles by destroying 'turtle prime' after he discovered alternate universes._

_Before that she had attended the Wedding of April O'Neil and Casey Jones, and some time before that she had teamed up with the turtles to defeat the 'True Shredder'._

_For a good while she had sworn vengeance on them after they caused her father to be exiled, and she had taken on the mantle of the Shredder herself; she had destroyed their lair, and attempted to kill them all._

_In other words; it was a pretty complicated relationship._

_Karai shook her head at the thoughts and jumped a farther distance from a business building to a apartment complex; her heart had been acing from the exhilaration of if she'd make it or not. Karai had to admit, this was kind of fun._

_But just as she was going to jump to another apartment complex she spotted a particular shape on the edge of a tall building. She recognized the shape as one of the turtles, but what were one of them doing out during the daylight, and alone?_

_Curious, Karai decided to investigate, again for a reason she didn't understand. _

_Jumping to the building Karai cautiously approached the Mutant turtle; it was Michaelangelo, she could tell by the orange mask. He was sitting on the edge, hugging his knees and shaking for some reason._

_Karai didn't want to alarm him, so she let her presence be known "Michaelangelo?" she called as she came up behind him._

_The orange-masked terrapin froze and turned to her, he surprised Karai with his teary eyes; a maelstrom of negative emotion. Karai didn't know most of the turtles very well, mostly she paid attention to Leonardo; but she was sure that Michaelangelo was the 'laid-back, easy-going' one of the four. _

_Michaelangelo just turned his head to her for a second, before burying it in his hand, Karai heard his muffled sobs. Her heart ached towards him; clearly something was wrong if a (sort-of) enemy had appeared and he just kept crying in front of her._

_Reluctantly, Karai took pity on the turtle. She put her hand on his shaking shoulder and gently said "Do not cry. It is alright. Tell me what is wrong."_

_Without warning, Michaelangelo got on his feet, whirled around and latched onto Karai in a hug. Surprised and not sure of what else to do, she faintly patted his shell and shushed him as he cried into her shoulder._

_Karai looked to the ground and saw there was a trail of blood (and some other fluid mixed with it) going down his legs all the way down to his feet; but where was the blood coming from?_

_"W-What do yo- you do?" Michaelangelo whispered in a hoarse voice "W-When so-someone you l-love hurts you?"_

* * *

><p>"…I felt sorry for him, but I was also curios as to what had happened, so I took him back with me to Oroku Manor. It took a while; he was hysteric for hours, but he eventually told me everything." Karai continued and took another sip of her tea. "Hearing his predicament I took pity on him and allowed him to stay with me. I had Chaplin check him over; the 'tearing' gave him an infection and he had a fever for a week and a half because of it."<p>

Raph winced hearing that, but he didn't say anything.

"Other than that most of the damage was psychological and emotional. During this time, my instincts told me to comfort him; I knew what it was like to be betrayed by a loved one, though not in the same way. After a month I became very fond of him as he started to make process and slowly become himself again. But unfortunately, it was during that time the Shredder returned."

Karai glanced at each member of the Homato clan before continuing "He discovered Michaelangelo before I could hide him. Naturally, father was livid and demanded I kill him. I lied to him and told him I was in the process of brainwashing him to turn against you. I was forced to tell him about what Michaelangelo had gone through, I did that to convince him that people were much easier to control after they'd gone through something traumatic. I told him the best way to destroy the turtles was to turn one of their own against them."

"He believed me." The Homato clan flinched hearing that.

"He took advantage of his fragile psyche; subjected him to an extreme form of training, some forms of torture and while he was doing that, he continually told Michaelangelo how this was Raphael's fault, how the Shredder was only trying to help him by training him to be a better ninja to get revenge on Raphael; he was pouring honey in one ear and poison in the other. During this training, we were not in New York; we were in Japan which is why you hadn't seen him the entire time."

"Shredder forced Michaelangelo personality to alter; did you see those metal wrist bands he wears? Those are a form of shock-collars, every time he made the wrong move or said something out of line, Shredder would electrocute him. Shredder forced him to eat nothing but candy for a week so he would never want any ever again in his life, if he did anything that remotely resembles being lazy, he would be either whipped or shocked. Shredder made sure he would break down every aspect of his personality."

Leo, Don, Splinter and Raph looked at her in horror hearing what their youngest family member had gone through.

"Overtime he changed for the worst and a new problem arose." Karai paused.

"What problem?" Don asked, slightly afraid of the answer, this time Chaplin answered.

"During his training sessions with the Shredder; he was 'Angelo' the cold, heartless and revenge-thirsty foot ninja; he had to act that way around the Shredder, for it was the Shredder who was breaking down his personality. But whenever he wasn;t training, he was around Karai or myself, he would be himself….well a variation of himself at least; he was like himself only terrified of physical contact and he developed claustrophobia. To cope with these two alternate personalities; he brain created two identities." The red-headed genius explained.

"What do you mean?" Leo asked in confusion.

"His mind had been traumatized enough after the 'incident'," Chaplin paused to send a quick glare at Raph "but it got way worse while Shredder was 'training' him; his mind in an effort to protect his normal personality created an alternate one; Angelo who he is most of the time, while he was 'Mikey' around me and Karai and anyone else he trusts. This was some form of Post-Traumatic Multiple-Personality Disorder, a very unstable form too; his personalities constantly shifted without warning, he had several episodes; namely whenever he was having nightmares, which he would constantly re-enact without knowing it."

"We gave him pills in hope it would even out his personality switches, for a while it worked." Karai continued for Chaplin "However, the effects of the pills seemed to have stopped whenever he appeared to you all; last night his episode was horrible, he kept screaming out his flashbacks, whenever an episode gets that bad I can't even wake him up."

Then there was silence as the Homato Clan comprehended this.

"Shell...Poor Mikey..." Don said quietly, his brown gaze on the floor.

Klunk then decided to make herself known; she skittered out of Don's lab (In Mikey's absence, Don had been Klunks substitute owner) and jumped onto Karai's lap, purring and mewing whilst rubbing against her upper body.

Karai looked at the ginger cat in confusion.

"I believe," Master Splinter said, "she smells Michaelangelo on you."

Klunk then jumped off of Karai and ran out of the lair suddenly; Raphael glanced at the cat before slowly drifting out of the room and without being detected, followed Klunk out of the lair.

He had an idea.

* * *

><p><em>What's Raph's Idea? And what does it have to do with Klunk?<em>

_Read, review, get the next chapter and find out!_


	16. I came to talk

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

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><p>It was dusk; Angelo had long since given up on finding Karai; where ever she was, she would have a good reason for being gone all day; right now he was watching the glow of the setting sun laminate the darkening city. Normally NYC would be really ugly, but even a place like this has it's moments in Angelo's opinion. He sat on the end of a rooftop with his feet swinging over the edge of the building; he was hidden by the shadow of a looming billboard so he was sure he wouldn't be seen by any humans.<p>

"Meow!"

Angelo twisted his head in alarm; but his guard went down when he saw it was just a cat; his eye ridges knitted in confusion; was that Klunk? It definitely looked and sounded like Klunk.

The ginger cat padded over to him and rubbed against his sides, mewing and purring happily. A small grin flicked on Angelo's face and his eyes cleared to its original azure color. "Hey Klunk," he said and scooped the cat up onto his lap; it was Klunk, he just knew it "how'd you find me up here, girl?"

The cat just kept rubbing against its original owner.

The blue-eyed turtle kept stroking Klunk's fur whilst watching the night draw in and the stars appearing. For some minutes, he was _Mikey._

The dark gray shades clouded his eyes again when a familiar gruff voice came from behind him.

"I thought I'd find ya here."

* * *

><p>"So you want to help Mikey…by putting him on withdrawal and having us capture him?" Don asked with a 'you're serious?' look on his face.<p>

"It is unorthodox, I know; but I believe it is not safe for him to go through withdrawal in the Foot, he needs to know that you're his family and your all still here for him. He is like a brother to me, but I cannot keep him away from his family and have him to continue acting like a monster." Karai explained, her gaze more on the floor than on Don.

"Mistress Karai, are you sure that is a good idea?" Chaplin asked "He'll be going through violent personality-switches and mood-swings, around a family he was brainwashed into believing is disgusted with him, and he'll be around the brother he wants to reap vengeance onto."

"We will visit and monitor his behavior, Chaplin." Karai insisted "And Raphael can stay with one of your human friends, can he not Donatello?"

"That might work…." Don trailed.

Leo decided to speak up "We just want our Mikey back, Karai; if we have to trust you to achieve that, then we will."

* * *

><p>"What the <em>fuck <em>do you want?" Angelo demanded; he was on his feet the moment Raph had spoke; Klunk at his feet and his hands were on he handles of his _chigiriki _in warning.

"Mikey….." Raph's tone was uncharacteristically soft, throwing Angelo off just a little bit. "I-I remember now."

"Is that so, Raphie-boy?" Angelo growled lowly; a feral look of insanity gleamed in his eyes "If you know; that means my revenge can finally take place!"

* * *

><p>"Leonardo, have you seen Raphael?" Splinter asked as he approached his leaf-green son.<p>

Leo frowned "No, didn't he go into his room sulking?"

Master Splinter shook his head.

* * *

><p>Raph blocked the blow of the iron weight of the <em>chigiriki <em>using his sai, he leaped backwards to create more distance between him and his rampaging brother. "Mikey! I don't want to fight with you, I came to talk!"

"I don't give a flying _fuck _what you came here for; I'm going to _hurt_ you!" Angelo growled and shot at Raph with his _chigiriki _spinning wildly.

"Mikey, please, hear me out!" Raph exclaimed as he struggled to dodge the flailing weapon.

"_Hear you out?_" Angelo hissed and got into an intimidating stance "Dude, you freaking _raped _me and you want me to hear you out?"

"I was _drunk, _bro!"

"That _really _makes up for it, doesn't it!"

* * *

><p>"Perhaps he left to collect his thoughts?" Karai offered. Her and Chaplin holding a refilled cup of tea.<p>

"Raph, collecting thoughts? Usually whenever things get shit-side-up like this, he punches something." Donnie muttered bitterly; still really peeved off at Raph.

"Maybe he went to 'bust sculls' with Casey." Leo shrugged, a a hardened look appeared in his eyes "Right now, I could care less what he's doing."

* * *

><p>Raph slammed to the ground and rolled a few meters before Angelo's foot stepped onto his sides and stopped him. Not willing to give Angelo a chance to kick him, Raph grabbed his ankle and pushed to unbalance him.<p>

Angelo fell, but he immediately got onto his side and wrapped his hands around Raph's throat. They rolled on the ground in a volatile frenzy; punches and kicks were exchanged, several bruises made on each other before they broke apart.

Raph stood sever meters away from his brother, panting heavily his sai tightly clasped in his hands. Angelo glared at Raph, he held out his _Jumonji-Yari._

"Mikey…." Raph called softly, Angelo narrowed his eyes. "About that day….. I'm-"

"You're _what!_" Angelo spat out venomously "You're _sorry? _Or are you gonna tell me how it was because of the alcohol and not you? News flash; IT WAS YOU WHO TOOK THE ALCOHOL! ITS ALL YOU'RE FAULT AND I **HATE** YOU!"

Raph winced; truthfully he blamed the alcohol more than he blamed himself; but hearing that stung because it was true, it stung to hear just how much Mikey meant it when he said 'hate'. It was his fault; looks like instead of talking to Mikey as he'd originally planned (Didn't think it all the way through) he would have to own up to the consequences.

"Mikey...There's somethin' I never told you...It's important, and it might mean something to you."

"Enlighten me."

"I love you."

Angelo's stared at him in blank surprise; his eyes widened and flicked to azure for a moment, but only for a moment. Angelo cocked his head to one side and glared at Raph with hatred.

"I don't believe you!" Angelo growled, it broke Raph's heart; if that didn't work, nothing would.

Raph did something very out of character that night; he didn't fight back when Angelo tackled him.

Angelo had him pinned down, Raph came to his senses and tried to fight Angelo off, but didn;t get the chance because Angelo pinched the nerve on his neck, making him black out.

* * *

><p><em>Oooh...What is Angelo gonna do? What about his family?<em>


	17. Raph's panic

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

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><p>"Mikey! Stop!" Raph yelled out, his voice edging on fear as Angelo kept him pinned to the ground, struggling to get between Raph's legs.<p>

"Stay fucking still!" Angelo growled angrily; one hand was pinning both of Raph's wrist on the ground while his other tried to pry Raph's knee's apart.

Minutes ago Raph had come to; he found himself lying on the floor in the room of an abandoned, run-down hotel. Angelo had been leaning against the corner, waiting for the exact moment Raph would wake up. Raph hadn't gotten the chance to get up before Angelo jumped him and had him pinned. Raph dully noted that Angelo didn't wear his foot uniform; showing his scar-marred body.

Angelo smirked evilly when he finally got between Raph's legs in spite of the elders struggles; Raph's panic was beginning to set in. The way Angelo was looking at him was like that of a wolf that had just cornered a rabit it had been chasing for hours.

Angelo got his mouth close to the side of Raph's head and whispered; "I'm going to _hurt _you."

Raph already fully understood the meaning of the threat. "Mikey…" he said softly "You don't want to do this, bro."

Angelo's smirk widened and with his now free hand he stroked Raph's cheek; it could have been a loving gesture if it weren't for that insane look Angelo bore, Raph shook his head to avoid the touch."If I _don't _want to do it, then pray tell why I'm going to do it? You think you know?"

"Revenge isn't the answer!" Raph growled "Rapin' me isn't goin' to make things betta', It can't change anythin' and you know that!" Raph managed to keep his voice normal; but on the inside he was terrified; both, that Angelo was actually going to rape him, and the fact that his Mikey might actually be gone for good.

"No it won't change the past." Angelo admitted sadly, but his expression hardened "But it will make you fell _everything _I felt; I'll make you feel the same pain, and I'll make you _bleed_ the same way. I'll make your world shatter, just like mine did."

Raph shuddered when he felt Angelo grab his tail. His panic was on overdrive; being he who is, he would usually react to bad situations in a violent way, but this was different, he'd never felt this afraid before. His breath became shallow and came out in sharp gasps; what did Donnie call this, hyperventilating?

But Raph refused to give in; he started to kick and squirm and make it near impossible for Angelo; if he was going down, he was going down fighting; it was Raph's unwritten motto.

"I said stay fucking still!" snarled Angelo; he clamped his teeth onto Raph's neck making the red-masked terripin cry out in pain, and moan out slighty in uncomfortable pleasure when Angelo started to suck on the hickey he made. Raph squirmed, his need to fight still strong.

Angelo yanked Raph's tail up and lined himself with the elders tail hole. "Better brace yourself." Angelo hissed and glared into Raph's face. He was surprised when he saw uncontained tears leak out of the corners of Raph's shut eyes; this made him pause for a second.

He stopped entirely when Raph opened his amber eyes and look straight into his "Mikey…." He pleaded "please don't do this." Raph was pleading…Raph was crying….

'_Just like me,_' Angelo thought, his thoughts suddenly ruled over; he couldn't move, he could only think.

_'Look at him! You can't hurt him he's your brother!' _A familiar voice screamed at him; Angelo recognized the surfers accent, it sounded exactly like he used to sound.

**'Brother….' **Thought Angelo as he continued to stare at Raph in puzzlement.

'_What the shell are you doing? You can't rape someone, you can't put someone through the same thing!_'

'**I can't….It hurt…..**'

'_You loved him!_'

'**Loved….?**'

'_Don't do this; what happened to you? You didn't used to blame Raph, and now your willing to violate him? Your being no better than him, no your being worse._'

'**But…his fault…**'

'_Do you really want to hurt Raph? __**Do **__you?_'

Raph… His big brother….. He loved him once… Raph admitted he loved him too…. Raph always would protect him, no questions asked …..

When he looked down, instead of Raph he saw pinned down, he saw the memory of himself from over a year ago. Crying and pleading, looking pathetic..

Raph looked up at Angelo cluelessly; Angelo suddenly stopped, not making any move to try and penetrate him. He had this really dazed look on his face. Raph's breath caught in his throat when he saw Angelo's eyes fill with tears, the dark gray shades were disappearing, and his eyes were turning blue again as horror started to fill his expression.

"M-Mikey?" Raph stuttered to the younger turtle.

Angelo shot away from Raph, more tears spilling down his face as he stumbled to the open window "S-Stay away from me, Raph!" He said, Raph realized it was Mikey talking this time.

"Wait! Mikey!" Raph called as Mikey opened the window.

"Stay away!" Mikey yelled and jumped out.

From the tone of his voice; Raph knew Mikey did not _threaten _Raph to stay away from him, he was _warning_ Raph to stay away.

* * *

><p><em>Ooooh ooooh, whats happening to Angelo?<em>


	18. Q and A

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

* * *

><p>'<em>Why couldn't I do it?<em>' Angelo wondered; he was leaning against a dumpster in a dark alley, contemplating; he's wanted revenge on Raph so badly before, but when it came to the actually revenge, he couldn't do it. '_He deserves it…but I couldn't do it…_'

'_Was it because of those stupid fake emotions I used to feel, does my mind still think they exist? Was it because I didn't want to stoop to the same level? Was it Honor? UGH! I'm so confused!_'

Angelo grabbed his head as a headache flared up; he gnashed his teeth together trying to ward off the pain, but it kept building and building. In his pain the black-masked turtle turned against one of the alley walls and slammed the side of his fist against it. Small sounds escaped from between his grounded teeth as he leaned against the wall for support.

More and more flashbacks accompanied the pain in his head; great, an episode while he was conscious just what he needed…..

* * *

><p><em>Mikey grinned comically after he'd brought down fifteen foot ninja "Haha! Get owned, get stoned, get-! AHHH!" His taunt was cut short when the blinding pain of the white-hot electrical current ran through his body. <em>

_It wasn't a short shock either; it continually ran through his body until he fell to the ground, his body in a constant spasm on agony._

_The Shredder loomed over him "Enough foolishness! You are a ninja, but if you want to be a clown so bad; then continue to dance at my feet, puppet!"_

* * *

><p><em>A foot ninja came into Mikey's room holding up a bag of gummy worms. "Turtle, it is time for dinner."<em>

_Mikey responded by vomiting on the floor. "Keep that crud away from me!" He shrieked and retched again; after a week of eating only candy, the mere sight of the stuff made him puke._

* * *

><p><em>"Angelo, you must focus." The Shredder commanded; Mikey shuttered at the name the Shredder had decided to start calling him. Mikey had a weird metal thing strapped onto his arms and he was forced to stare at a small plant while there was two running TV's at his left and right side. <em>

_Mikey did focus on the plant for about two seconds before his gaze drifted to the TV on his left side. As soon as his gaze did drift, a weird bright-red force of some kind illuminated his body and he was filled with pain._

_Mikey cried out before the red force receded._

_"Every time you do not focus on the plant," The Shredder began sadistically "you will be put through terrible pain."_

* * *

><p>Growling through his shut teeth, Angelo continued to pound at the wall with the sides of his fist, not caring if his skin was beginning to rip open. His eyes flew open as the color constantly shifted between blue, blue-gray and gray; tears were dripping down his face.<p>

* * *

><p><em>Mikey was swinging his new <em>chigiriki _around as he shot away from the Shredder; new bruises were beginning to form on his body, he was panting heavily. One of his eyes were swollen shut, his collarbone was broken, his plastron had a few cracks on it (blood was seeping through) and his side was slashed._

_Shredder had called this 'Sparring'…_

_With all of his remaining strength Mikey charged at Shredder, a new hardened look was in the eye that wasn't swollen. If Shredder wanted a fight…A fight he would get…_

_He curled his fist back to punch, as expected the Shredder got into position to block it. When Mikey was close enough he switched his move to a sweep-kick. He was shocked when the Shredder grabbed onto the bottom of his ankle; how did he see through his plan? The Shredder flung Mikey at the wall._

_His shell hit the wall hard; Mikey slid to the ground and rolled onto his side._

_"So weak. So predictable." The Shredder growled, "How much shall it take for you to learn, Angelo? Perhaps I should leave a 'reminder' for you."_

_The metal-clad Utrom raised his bladed hand and forced it down at Mikey._

_The sea-green turtle did the only thing he could think of; he rolled onto his plastron, using his shell as a shield. The Shredder struck._

* * *

><p>Angelo drew away from the wall and held his head; he was swaying from the pain that was finally starting to fade. He cursed the fact that he wasn't wearing his foot uniform because he carried his pills in them. He stumbled down the alley; his eyes blank in thought; this was all Raph's fault, but he couldn't hurt him that way, couldn't make him pay.<p>

_'I'm so confused…Need answers…' _Angelo thought loosely '_But who can give me answers? Shredder? … No, he's think I was going soft. Karai…No, this is beyond her. Chaplin? No…He's a scientific mind not a social worker…What about…That's it!_'

"Master Splinter can give me answers," Angelo said out loud, "he was always right before."

Angelo looked up at the darkened sky and studied the rooftops for a few moments. He ran off to the nearest sewer-cover when he saw the familiar shapes of his brothers at the top of the buildings.

* * *

><p>The lair…..It wasn't too different from the last time Angelo had been there, granted it was a little more neat without him around. He felt a bit nostalgic being around his old home, but at the same time it gave him bad memories of the <em>that <em>day, the last time he'd been in the lair, over a year ago.

But he wasn't here to dwell on the past; he came for answers from his former sensei. Angelo lingered near the walls and corners where the shadows were, careful not to trip on anything or make any noise; stealthily he maneuvered his way to Master Splinter's room.

Angelo hesitated when he came to the door; would Master Splinter really give him answers so easily, after what his youngest son had become?

"Come in, my son." Master Splinter's voice said from the other side of the door, Angelo felt a bit braver hearing his fathers calm voice. Pushing negative thoughts away Angelo entered the room.

The room was dark, but Master Splinter had two rows of candles that lit the room; one row at each of his sides, looking somewhat like a pathway.

"Michaelangelo, my son." The gray rat said with his eyes still closed "I have been expecting you."

"You have?" Angelo asked from the other side of the candle pathway, his voice monotone with an edge of surprise.

"I know you are very confused, Michaelangelo, you have come seeking answers." Said his father.

'_Same old Master Splinter; cryptic and psychic as ever._' Thought Angelo, he still stood up but he neared his rat father. "Why couldn't I do it?"

"Do what?"

"I wanted him to pay, I wanted him to feel the same pain, b-but I couldn't so it! I don't get it; I wanted revenge for so long, but I just couldn't do it!" Angelo raved.

Master Splinter seemed to know exactly what he was talking about "Michaelangelo, what you wanted was what you didn't need; your heart and mind still know the difference between right and wrong."

"….I don't get it."

"It means the Shredder had not destroyed all part of you; your conscience is still alive, your judgment may be clouded but you still chose good over bad."

"Father?" Angelo said softly "Why don't you hate me? I joined your sworn enemy, I hurt my brother, I tried to do to Raph as he had done to me….I'm a monster."

A sad smile ghosted on Splinter's muzzle, his eyes opened "You are not a monster, you went through something traumatic and Shredder took advantage of your mind."

The Shredder….

"Michaelangelo?" Master Splinter's voice took Angelo away from his thoughts.

"Yes?"

"Your brothers told me your skill has improved….Is the Shredder a better sensei than I?" Angelo saw the look of doubt in Splinter gray eyes; Master Splinters doubt in himself.

Angelo thought for a moment, he got closer to Splinter and went do onto his knee's to kneel "Oroku Saki see's me as his son…." He began, sadness befell Splinters face "…but I do not see him as a father. My only father is Homato Splinter."

Before Angelo could hug his father, he felt a sharp pain in his shoulder. He snapped his head in the direction of the door and saw Donnie standing there with a dart-gun in hand. Donnie looked a little bewildered.

Angelo looked at Splinter, the dart in his shoulder and Donnie; he repeated this gesture a few times before his gaze finally stayed onto his purple-masked brother.

"…..Cheap shot…" Angelo said before succombing to the tranquilizer.

* * *

><p><em>Yeah...So they finally caught Angelo, what next? And where's Raph?<em>


	19. Reunion

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

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><p>Leo stared uncertainly at his baby brother in the container they'd used during Donnie's second mutation, said turtle was staring at them calmly through the green-tinted glass (Or whatever the hell the thing was made of...) he was leading back against the smooth rounded walls with his arms crossed. It made Leo feel slightly sick, putting Angelo in the container made it seem like they were treating him like a monster.<p>

Strangely enough, Angelo hadn't been wearing his foot uniform, but Leo could now see why he did wear it; there literally wasn't an inch of space on his legs or plastron that wasn't scarred. Some were old; some were new, many made by several different types of weapons. Leo recognized that some of slash scars were made by Shredder's claws, including the deep slash-gouge at the center of Angelo's shell and the slash-scar on his side. There were even scars caused by the lashes of whips.

Leo cursed the Shredder for marring his brothers body like that. The next time Leonardo see's the Shredder, the fucker will _die._

Master Splinter and Donnie were also standing in front of the container as well along side Leo, they too were staring at Angelo, very unsure of what to do or say. They had been standing there ever since Angelo had come to about fifteen minutes ago.

"So," Angelo said coldly, breaking the long silence "are we gonna get this 'family reunion' thing going, or are you all just going to keep staring at me like I'm a goldfish?" his cold tone had a sarcastic edge.

Donnie was the first to speak; he was very nervous, Leo could tell by the twitching of his hand. "Mikey, we know what happened to you."

"Yeah, yeah; I was brainwashed by the Shredder, I've heard it before." Angelo said with a roll of his eyes, Leo was taken aback; did Angelo really think they didn't know, he had come here to talk to Master Splinter about.

"Not that, Mikey." Leo said softly, Angelo tensed up slightly.

"Then what? What are you talking about?" Angelo asked, almost tripping over his words.

"Raph told us what happened." Leo replied, he put his hand on the glass; a gesture of reaching out.

Angelo turned his head to the side so they wouldn't look him in the face; his teeth were gnashed together and he had his eyes shut. "He t-told you?" he stuttered through clamped teeth.

"He did," Donnie confirmed; Leo saw anger and pity in his genius brothers brown eyes – anger at Raph and pity to Mikey. "He didn't know what he did until recently Mikey, he really didn't. He felt bad about it, too." Leo was surprised Donnie was sticking up for Raph when he'd been the one who showed the strongest desire to hurt him after learning about what the red-masked turtle had done.

"Is it surprising I don't believe you?" Angelo asked icily "about the feeling bad thing, I mean."

"Michaelangelo," Master Splinter said and took a step closer to the container "what your brother did was horrid, we know; but he did not do it intentionally. If he could control it, he would have."

"Your like a broken record," Angelo growled and tightened his crossed arms "'he couldn't control it' is so old an excuse; Hothead could _never _control his damn temper, he was _always_ mad at something. But he was in perfect control when he decided to get wasted!"

Master Splinter took a step back in surprise over his youngest sons outburst.

"And, another thing;" Angelo turned his head towards them again, his eyes were hard and glazed over, with tears glistening at his raw, red eyelid "unintentional or not, it doesn't change the fact I was sodomized by my own brother!"

Unexpectedly, Angelo threw a punch at the green-tinted glass walls and repeatedly punched it; Donnie had already bandaged up that hand after he found it torn open from punching something earlier, but the scabs were probably being broken from more abuse.

"You can say you understand _all _you want; but it's a fucking _lie!_ You _don't_ know what it's like! So don't give me that _shit!_"

Leo spoke up "We're not saying we understand Mikey; we want to help you, your our little brother, let us help you!"

"Brother…." Angelo whispered the word coldly and his eyes turned fully gray for a second "that word means nothing to me."

Suddenly, Angelo tensed up and looked down at his plastron frantically; looking for something. It seemed only then he realized he wasn't wearing his uniform; he fell onto his knee's and held his head, his face contorted in pain, he was panting frantically and his body kept shaking.

Concerned, Donnie put his hand to the glass "Mikey?" he called.

Angelo started to twist and jerk around as if he was trying to shake something that wouldn't come off; tears were beginning to fall out of his eyes. Leo felt as though he would go ballistic with concern.

"Donnie! What's happening?" Leo demanded, panicking.

"I-I think he's having an episode." Donnie said, he was also panicking, panicking because he didn't know what to do about it.

Angelo's eyes flew open; he was looking around desperately outside of the container. "K-Karai!" he called out in despair "Karai!"

In spite of his panic, Leo felt a streak of jealousy; he should be looking to him or Donnie for comfort, not Karai.

Master Splinter worryingly put his paw to the glass, his eyes were gentle "Be strong my son; bear with the pain."

Angelo looked at him with wide, teary blue eyes….No gray, fully blue, just like the Mikey Leo loved.

"Bear with it." Master Splinter consoled gently.

Donnie pressed the button that released the tranquilizing gas.

* * *

><p><em>Okay, so the next couple of Chapters his family tried to bring him out of his shell, no pun intended. But where's Raph? How will Angelo deal with withdrawl?<em>


	20. Donatello's logs: Day 6 to 10

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

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><p><strong>Donatello's Logs: Observing Michaelangelo's Behavior<strong>

**Log 1) Day six**

Chaplin convinced me to monitor Mikey's behavior by keeping logs, just to make sure he makes progress in the duration of his time here. I went with the idea, but I'm not going to tell Leo or Master Splinter; they'd think I was treating Mikey as a science experiment.

Looking over the last few days, I can't help but feel there hasn't been much progress; Mikey _genuinely _thinks we're disgusted by him and are only doing this out of pity. Leo and I are trying hard to bring out the old Mikey without triggering any episodes. Today was when withdrawal finally hit him.

Speaking of Leo, ever since I let Mikey roam out of the container, Leo's put it upon himself to follow him around everywhere he goes, even more than I do. It's weird, Leo's missing training sessions and everything which is very out-of-character form him.

I don't think Mikey likes that Leo keeps following him around, this isn't surprising that he likes his space but if Leo so much as got in his personal space bubble he'd freak out.

But onto another subject; Today I tried to se if Mikey would like jokes, after all he still has a sense of humor (albeit, more sarcastic than a sense of humor but I'll take anything into consideration) so I told Mikey a few jokes (really pathetic ones on my part) and he found my lack of telling good jokes more funny than the jokes themselves. So in the end he told _me _a joke.

Oh _god _that joke was _horrid. _Apparently the only jokes they _do _tell in the Foot are all dirty ones, for someone with a more perverted sense of humor (Like Casey or Raph) it would be pretty funny, but for someone like me or Leo it was _terrible. _I don't think I could ever look at KFC the same way ever again.

Then again, it is surprising how a victim of rape would tell dirty jokes; I wonder what the deal with that is.

Mikey experienced no episodes today, but he is definitely suffering the withdrawal affects; loss of appetite is one, he hasn't eaten all day today and no amount of coaxing from Leo is getting him to eat anything, but I thinks that's partially my fault; I think he has a sneaking suspicion that I'm spiking his food….Okay, maybe I _do _spike his food, but only with minor sedative to keep him less violent!

Another effect is lack of sleep; when I asked him about it he admitted he was afraid of having an unconscious episode. The only time we could get him to sleep tonight was when Karai came over and said she would stay with him tonight…Well…Leo looked pretty mad about it, It took a while of talking to him to convince him that this was the only way we could get Mikey too sleep. He looked pretty jealous, and I was a little myself how Mikey would let Karai in his personal space and trust her completely, while he is weary of us, his own family.

* * *

><p><strong>Log 2) Day seven<strong>

This morning Mikey asked if he could join me and Leo for training; I saw it as a sign that he was opening up to us. Looking back, I think that was way too wishful thinking, a new withdrawal effect had arisen; very high aggression.

We were sparring, not using our weapons since we still didn't trust Mikey with his own. And it's a really good thing it wasn't weapons training.

It went like this; I was sparring with Karai (she'd joined out sparring session since there was an odd number of us without Raph) and Leo was sparring with Mikey. Mikey was dodging every attack Leo threw and in return he wasn't fighting; he was using a method we'd often use before; waste your opponents energy then attack.

Leo, being the most ninja-like of us all, saw through Mikey's method and used lighter attacks that would conserve his own energy but waste Mikey's because he was dodging. At The right moment he thrust his palms out and pinned Mikey to the wall.

Karai tried to warn him but it was too late.

Mikey went ballistic.

This was some form of an episode, I knew, but it was one of the conscious episodes Chaplin told me about where he would re-enact flashbacks without knowing it.

At first he was blank, but then he attacked Leo; a someone-wins-and-the-other-dies kind of fights, he got up in Leo's space bubble (something he hadn't done before because of his personal space issues) which didn't give Leo enough room to attack.

He was wailing on Leo, fighting in the most violent way I'd ever seen any of us use (including Raph on a bad day) it was like he was trying to rip Leo to shreds, or kill him!

Karai and I struggled to pry him off of Leo; as soon as we did he turned on us, seeing us most likely as others from his flashback. Luckily, before he could really attack us, Leo came up behind him and pinched the nerve on his neck, knocking him out cold.

After Leo carried Mikey to his room, Karai explained the flash back to us; Mikey had been once forced to fight several armed Foot ninja while he himself was weaponless, the Shredder had said that he either beat them all, or he'd die trying.

The Shredder will die!

* * *

><p><strong>Log 3) Day eight<strong>

Today, Karai left. But that's not the point. Mikey finally asked me where Raph was. We told him we didn't know; which was sort-of true, the day we captured him Raph had gone into hiding, but didn't tell us where he was. I think Master Splinter knew, but he didn't tell us.

Also, today Casey and April finally returned from their trip to Rome. They were gone days before we found Mikey and I hadn't been able to contact them, so it took a while to explain the situation.

When they came over, they couldn't believe what Mikey was like: April ran up to hug him; he jumped out of the way and didn't even apologize over the fact that she hit the wall. Casey was going to punch him, but Mikey grabbed his fist and twisted his arm.

When I got him to let go, he didn't talk to them; he went to the couch and fell asleep; a new effect of withdrawal, as oppose to the earlier symptom of lack of sleep, he was now going through extreme fatigue.

April was being motherly despite his ignorance of her, she went to the couch and whispered to him while he was asleep and patted his shell, Mikey seemed more relaxed in his sleep; he must have thought she was Karai.

Casey told me he'd just saw Raph; when he did see him he was doing some sort of training, something that past the borders of extreme. He was jumping long-distances on buildings with really heavy iron weight tied onto his arms and legs.

Why is Raph training so hard?

* * *

><p><strong>Log 3) Day nine<strong>

Mikey came up to me and asked if I would remove the metal bands from his wrists; being a form of shock collar, they were very hard to remove but I managed to get them off. His wrists were in worse condition than I thought; the chafing left marks, and the skin was pale pinkish-green burn scars left behind from all the electrical heat.

Leo didn't like seeing his wrists like that either; so he gave Mikey some of his gear (Since Mikey was about Leo's size now and his own old gear was too small.) the sweatbands covered his wrists well, but some of the scars still show a little.

Master Splinter also offered him his orange mask, but Mikey turned it down. He still insists on wearing the black mask. That black mask and the Foot tattoo on his shoulder really bug me, almost as much as the scars do.

Once again we are having trouble getting Mikey to eat things; the Foot turned him into a complete health nut, so we can't even get him to eat Pizza. Whenever Leo offered him some, Mikey gave him a really long lecture on how bad that stuff was. As much as the reality of it was sad; it was pretty funny how _Mikey _was giving _Leo _a _lecture _on why he, Mikey, wasn't going to eat _pizza._

Mikey told me it was because the Foot only ever fed him some kind of nutrient-rich mush that he could never identify. Anytime he asked for anything else, they would give him a really long lecture about health and junk food, and then they'd show him pictures of people who are obese, have diabetes or have cancer. So they scared the love of junk food out of him.

Leo tried to make something for him while Mikey and I were watching TV together (Even more strange, Mikey didn't even seem to like TV anymore, he was staring at the screen, sure, but his mind was elsewhere. I've asked it before and I'll ask it again: Is this really Mikey?) And like any other time Leo tries to cook, the whole Lair fills with smoke.

So after getting the Fire extinguisher and coating the entire kitchen (And Leo) Mikey walks up to Leo, snatches the spatula from his hands and says "You know, I almost forgot how you have the cooking skill of a _mop!_" you'd think he was being playful, but it sounded like he was generally trying to be mean to Leo.

* * *

><p><strong>Log 4) Day 10<strong>

Once again, Mikey's showing a new symptom of withdrawal: but this time, it was high fever, headache and delusions: a whole day-long episode it seemed.

When he woke up, he must have thought it was back during his training in Japan with the Foot, he thought Leo was Karai and I was Chaplin (Where he sees the resemblance, I have no idea) He, thinking I was Chaplin, told me he kept having 'mind-blanks' during training and when he was around the Shredder, I guessed that this was around the time his multiple personality disorder was starting to show, I told him that I'd do research later.

Then he was talking to Leo, thinking he was Karai, saying it felt as if he was….. Losing himself, as he put it. He was worried he would change too much.

Leo looked sympathetic, but also mad (probably at the Shredder, or Raph, either/or) he held Mikey in a hug, probably because this was the only chance he'd get to do so since Mikey thought he was Karai. I can't help but think Leo held on a little too long, the hug was getting somewhat…well, intimate. I half-expected Leo to kiss him or some romantic crap like that. But Leo wouldn't do that. (**A/N, Oh the irony!**)

Things got worse when Master Splinter came into the room; Mikey thought he was the _Shredder. _He also thought it was the really violent 'sparring' sessions I can only imagine through the tidbits of information Karai gave me.

Mikey attacked him. Master Splinter, though shocked, used his walking stick to protect himself from blows. When the time came he used it to trip him. Whatever Mikey thought was happening; he rolled onto his plastron as if he was trying to protect himself from a blow that he had received in the past. Then he cried out in pain and kept squirming on the ground.

Master Splinter put his paw on his forehead to calm him down, but Mikey, still in the delusion that it was the Shredder, ran over to Leo.

Leo had Mikey on his lap, with his arms around him and was rocking him around and whispering things were okay. Honestly, as touching as it should have seemed, I got another feeling from it, something less innocent than a brother comforting a brother.

I went over to Mikey and he asked me if I would look at his injuries. He still thought I was Chaplin. I asked him to show me where it hurt. He pointed at some of the scars on his plastron under the illusion that they were injuries and then pointed at his stomach and said that the Shredder had stabbed him.

The entire time I was 'treating' him, Mikey clung onto Leo like he was Karai, and told 'her' that 'she' reminded him a lot of Leo, then announced that 'she' would his sister-in-arms from now on.

"I'd like that." Leo had said, pretending to be Karai. Mikey fell asleep; I'm not sure if it really happened in his flashback or if it was his fever.

Leo told me that in case Mikey had a fever when he woke up, he would continue to pretend to be Karai and sleep with him the same way Karai does since it seems to keep him at peace during the night.

I wish I could believe Leo, but it seems like it was a little more than that, but what? Does Leo feel the way for Mikey...the same way that I feel for Leo?

* * *

><p><em>That's right people; Donnie likes Leo! Anyone recall the first chapter (Not prologue) where Donnie had something to tell Leo but didn't say anything?<em>

_Next chapter will also be logs, but then back to normal story_


	21. Donatello's logs: Day 11 to 15

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

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><p><strong>Donatello's Logs: Observing Michaelangelo's Behavior<strong>

**Log 5) Day eleven**

Mikey woke up with his fever gone, and no memory of yesterday. So waking up with Leo lying next to him….Didn't go so well on both parts.

Let's just say he avoided Leo the rest of the day.

* * *

><p><strong>Log 6) Day twelve<strong>

Today Leo and I again attempted to get Mikey back to his old habits; unfortunately, it seems the Shredder had tried hard to destroy ever aspect of Mikey's personality.

I offered him a comic, Mikey said comics were stupid (He opted for Manga instead; apparently a new habit he picked up from being in Japan). Leo tried to give him a bag of potato chips and Mikey again gave him a junk food lecture. We turned on cartoons, and he completely ignored them. I think the only habit that stayed was his love of Rap music (but he doesn't play it loudly on a stereo anymore, he listens to them on headphones, mostly to ignore us though) and skateboarding, but then again that might be because the Shredder didn't know that Mikey skateboarded.

Mikey is still avoiding Leo; he's using me as a shield, hiding behind me as soon as Leo gets close enough. Is he afraid of Leo now? I just hope it's a sign that Mikey's warming up to me, he stopped glaring at me to say the least.

* * *

><p><strong>Log 7) Day thirteen<strong>

Today I brought Mikey with me to the dump since he was getting twitchy being in the lair all the time; I was a little weary because I was afraid he would escape, so I had to bring Leo with me to chaperone him, I don't Mikey appreciated it.

While I was sifting through the dump, Mikey was grinding around on his skateboard; he was having fun doing it to, it was like having the old Mikey back. In fact, his eyes were blue; Karai told me that for some reason his eyes shift with his personality, scientifically his eye color should have nothing to do with his personality, but if it can help us see which personality he is then I won't complain.

I was pulled aside by someone when Leo and Mikey weren't looking; it was Raph!

He was covered in bruised and he looked really tired. I got him to tell me the reason behind his intense training; he was trying to catch up to Mikey since Mikey was now ahead of us from his own year-long training with the Shredder (But I don't think that's the whole truth, Raph was training for another reason). He also admitted that Mikey tried to force himself onto him, but had decided not to at the last minute.

This surprised me; Mikey tried to do _that_ to Raph! Okay, now I know the Shredder went too far!

In exchange, I told Raph that we had captured Mikey and were trying to get him back to normal; Raph looked a little happier when he saw Mikey being a bit more like his old self, but he was glaring at Leo; Master Splinter said that Raph loved Mikey, was he feeling jealous?

He isn't the only one.

* * *

><p><strong>Log 8) Day fourteen<strong>

Leo gave Mikey his weapons back today, but we all watched him like a hawk in the fear that he would try something funny. I asked Mikey why he didn't use his nunchucks anymore, he looked mad but he told me that the Foot elite broke them and the Shredder replaced them with _chigiriki_ since they were a great deal alike.

I decided that I would be more careful when asking him questions.

I really do think Mikey is warming us to us; he was helping me with an invention today and out of nowhere he gave me a hug and told me had really had missed me while he was gone. I sure hope that he meant that and it wasn't another withdrawal mood-swing.

Leo, Mikey and I also meditated with Master Splinter. Master Splinter told him that meditating could help with his shattered mind. It was kind of disturbing how Mikey was completely still and was actually into it; in the past he couldn't keep still longer than two minutes unless if it was important, I've never seen him so focused.

* * *

><p><strong>Log 9) Day fifteen<strong>

Mikey had a conscious episode today; I think it was about the day we 'found' him, he again thought that Leo was Karai, but he thought I was _Raph._

He attacked me! The same way he'd attacked Raph that day, he even threw me at the wall with his chigiriki; I really wish I would have paid attention to that fight, and that we hadn't give him his weapons back.

Luckily Leo pulled him away before he could do any serious damage. He held onto him tightly until Mikey's rage subsided and he was back to reality. I'm scared about how violent he would get if I didn't sedate the food he did eat.

Mikey then started crying into Leo's plastron thinking he was Karai; Leo took him to the Hallway. It probably wasn't my best idea, but I followed and watched what was going on.

Mikey kept crying, and Leo was hugging him in an attempt to calm him down. He then did something surprising; he told Mikey he wasn't Karai. That brought him back to reality and he tried to get away from Leo but Leo wouldn't let go.

The more surprising he told Mikey to look at him; which he did, then Leo did the most surprising thing ever. He told Mikey he **loved **him and kissed him.

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><p><em>Next chapter is normal story!<em>

_And by the way, Raph has another motive in his training besides catching up to Mikey._


	22. BRB

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

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><p>Leo opened his eyes as he awoke and couldn't help the bright smile that enveloped his face; he still couldn't believe it.<p>

Two days ago, after Mikey had an episode, he finally admitted that he loved him and kissed him; Mikey didn't push him away, he even responded! After the kiss ended they stood there in the Hallway for a while with Mikey still tight in his arms, Leo had then asked him if he would be his mate.

Mikey had said _yes._

Now said turtle was lying next to him in bed, asleep. They were in Leo's own room. No, they hadn't done anything past sleeping in the same bed or kissing, Leo tread carefully around that since Mikey was a victim of rape and being intimate would be difficult for him. Besides, their relationship was too new for anything like that, Leo was more than willing to wait.

Master Splinter and Don knew, and they were okay with it; well, Master Splinter said he was okay with it but he still shook his head in some sort of emotion and Don…. He was being really overprotective of Mikey and he seemed to be silently disapproving their relationship.

"Mikey," Leo cooed and shook his mate gently; Mikey grumbled something that sounded like 'Go away Hun….I might kill you later' (Probably thinking this was another morning in the Foot clan). In response Leo lifted Mikey's head and kissed his cheek.

Mikey's sleepy blue-gray eyes opened and he shook his head slightly to shake Leo off, "Ew…Leo cooties." He mumbled and wiped his cheek with the back of his hand.

Leo frowned; did Mikey mean that, or was he being playful? With the new personality, it was hard to tell sometimes.

(_Time skip to breakfast_)

Don was setting plates for all of them; all plates had toast and scrambled eggs, Don and Leo were drinking milk while Master Splinter and Mikey were drinking tea.

Mikey just poked at his food and sipped his tea as the others ate.

"Michaelangelo," Master Splinter said sternly, gaining the black-masked turtles attention "You must eat."

"I'm not hungry." Mikey mumbled.

"You haven't been hungry in a week, Mikey; that isn't healthy." Donnie said.

"Who fucking asked you?" Mikey growled, Donnie was taken aback and looked insulted.

"Michaelangelo! I do not condone that type of language in my home!" Master Splinter told him.

"Well I'm _sorry_ if it was you fuckers who _kidnapped _me and didn't give me any other option than to stay!" Mikey snapped and got up abruptly; he stalked out but stopped midway.

Mikey sighed sadly "Look, I'm sorry; it's just…..being in the Lair all the time is really getting to me, okay?"

The others where silent for a moment.

Leo looked at his mate; he'd never before snapped at Master Splinter, he was respectful towards their sensei in spite of Shredder's brainwashing.

"Err…Maybe you could go on patrol with us?" Donnie suggested with a shrug.

Mikey gave him a look "That is the _stupidest _thing that's ever come out of your mouth; if the Shredder or the Foot ninjas see me with you guys, he'll find out about Karai and Chaplin's disloyalty and _kill _them, then he'll hunt my sorry shell down and kill _me_ for disloyalty."

Leo sent Mikey a glare; Donnie was only trying to help and he was acting like Don was a moron who didn't know better. "He was only making a suggestion, Mikey! He didn't think about that."

Mikey returned Leo's glare "Well excuse me for thinking the so-called genius would have a firm enough grasp of the obvious!" he growled and stalked away to the entrance of the lair, he grabbed his skateboard.

"Hey, where are you going?" Leo demanded.

"The fuck out of here, that's where!" Mikey retorted to his mate and hopped onto his skateboard "And don't worry; I'm just gonna get fresh air, I'm not going to crawl back to the Foot or anything. I'll be back in a while." And then he was gone like smoke.

* * *

><p>"Leo." The voice of his purple-masked brother divided Leo's attention from his kata's.<p>

"Yes, what is it Donnie?" Leo asked calmly.

Donnie looked at the floor with his arms crossed, it took him a while to reply, as if he knew what he wanted to say but couldn't find the right words.

"Leo, I don't think you should have a relationship with Mikey."

_That _got Leo to stop his kata's (Wow, shocker.)

"What do you mean?" Leo demanded and narrowed his brown eyes.

"Leo, you should know that this isn't right!"

"What the shell are you talking about?"

"He isn't in the right mind, Leo! He has Post-Traumatic Multiple-Personality disorder and he's going through withdrawal, you of all turtles should know that he can't think straight half the time; he thought Master Splinter was the _Shredder!_" Don ranted.

Leo looked to the floor, not quite sure how to respond.

"And," Donnie added, his gaze lifted from the floor and onto the leader "Mikey loved _Raph, _if it weren't for what happened he'd still love Raph."

"People always find love again, Donnie." Leo growled.

"Leo, I know you love Mikey but…" Don trailed off "I don't think a relationship is a good idea for him at the time; he can't even have a physical relationship with you."

"Don't even go there, Don!" Leo snapped "I wouldn't force myself on him!"

"I'm not saying you would." Don said with his brown eyes narrowed "Just be careful Leo, his psyche isn't stable; one or both of you could end up really hurt."

Don turned around and left a stunned Leo behind in the Dojo.

* * *

><p>Angelo bit his lower beak; he hadn't meant to make his family upset, or to get in a fight with his mate. He hadn't been a very good guest, he could tell; he would never admit it, but somewhere very, very, very, <em>very<em> deep down there was a tiny part of him that appreciated there concern.

'_I've dishonored my Father, I can't believe I was being so disrespectful,' _Angelo thought, he leaned against the alley wall and looked to the sky that was dark gray with heavy rain clouds. '_I have no honor'._

A dry chuckle escaped from his mouth '_Like I had any honor left to lose. Let's see; I was raped by my own brother, I disowned my own family, I joined my mortal enemy, I willingly fought against my brothers and then I tried to rape Raph. Yeah, some 'honorable' ninja I am. Ph, if Leo weren't my mate he would be so pissed._'

Leo...

Angelo has admired Leonoardo for years; he, who had the responsibility as leader. As leader, it was always Leo's job to keep them happy and in line, so wouldn't it only be fair for Angelo to give Leo the only thing he'd asked of him, a relationship? Though Angelo didn't believe in love, he did believe in mutual attraction, Leo _loved _him so overtime Angelo could learn to feel the same way, right? A lot of relationships start with only one of the people in love.

"Well, well, look who we have here." Angelo was pulled out of his thoughts by a familiar deep voice.

"What the shell do you want, Hun?" Angelo growled and whipped out his _chigiriki_; he came face-to-face with Hun and the many Purple Dragons milling around him.

"The Shredder has had us look for you for the past week, freak." Hun said and studied Angelo's appearance "He will not be pleased to here you have switched sides."

"I didn't switch sides." Angelo announced, but he wasn't sure if he meant that, whose side was he on; his family with his father, brother and mate or the Foot clan, where he had Karai, Chaplin and power. "But I'll ask again; what the shell do you want?"

"We brought you a present." Hun replied with a evil grin, he motioned to the Purple Dragon's who started to drag something up.

"For me, oh you shouldn't have." Angelo said sarcastically; he was still on high alert, chances were Hun had a machine gun of some kind that he wanted to test on him.

It wasn't the machine gun that the Purple Dragon dragged foreword.

It was _Raph._

* * *

><p><em>...And Angelo looked at Hun and asked "This is a re-gift, isn't it?"<em>

_Naw, naw that doesn't happen But we wish it would! _

_What will Angelo do?_

_Read, review, get the next chapter and find out!_


	23. Raph tries a hand at redemption

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

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><p>(Two days earlier)<p>

_Shredder had made the right choice in letting Angelo live; though if he could have chosen one of the turtles himself, his first choice would have been Leonardo. But any of the turtles were good enough. From his long experiences on Earth he had learned that the best way to destroy your enemy was to turn one of their own against them, he also learned that the best way to brainwash someone was to take advantage of them when their minds were at their most vulnerable._

_It had been fun, destroying every aspect of Michaelangelo's personality until he was loyal member of the Foot, Shredder had enjoyed watching him suffer through the extreme training; it had improved his skill above Shredder's expectation and Shredder had gained vengeance towards him._

_The only downsides were that it seemed as though Angelo's old personality had rubbed off of Karai: Shredder now questioned her loyalty more than Angelo's, her loyalty towards her 'brother' is possible now stronger than her loyalty to him. But Shredder held that against Karai; as long as Angelo and Chaplin were in the Foot, so was she._

_Angelo had been missing for almost two weeks; while the Shredder did not care for him, he did have a sneaking suspicion that he had switched sides back to his former family, that would spell trouble since Angelo was now much more skilled in Ninjitsu and would be a formidable enemy. Karai always reported that she did not know where he was and she was always searching, but he suspected she had something to do with Angelo's disappearance._

_Suddenly, the door to his chambers sprung wide open; two of his ninja's were thrown inside and landed hard on the ground, unconscious._

_"SHREDDA'!" A voice roared into the chambers and a dark figure jumped into the room, amber eyes glinting maliciously through the veil of darkness._

_"Ah, Raphael; to what do I owe the honor of your presence?" Shredder asked mockingly and folded his hands under his chin (__**A/N, just so you know, he' in his human guise, so he's not wearing his armor**__)_

_Raphael growled and took out his sai's "Enough formalities Shred-head! I'm here to make ya pay for what ya did ta my brotha'!" He told before he charged at the Shredder._

_Oroku Saki moved swiftly to the right before Raphael could tackle him; but said red-masked turtle surprised him but stopping in place and doing a Reverse Crescent kick, sending Saki several feet away._

_Saki swiftly did a cartwheel-like flip and landed directly on his feet. He narrowed his dark eyes; he knew from experience and reports from the Foot ninja that Raphael was the head-on fighter, the one who preferred to get fights done quickly and violently. The 'wildcard' of the group. But now he was acting more on strategy. _

_Raphael charged at Saki again. Saki was amazed how the amber-eyes terrapin moved faster than ever; throwing his weight around and using all the power in his legs in a more pounce-like sort of run._

_Saki kept moving to dodge Raphael's hits, but Raphael kept stomping one foot down to stop himself and spun on it to face him every time so he would get several good punches in._

_With one punch, Saki vied his arms around Raphael's body, did a Hip Thrust (_**A/N **It isn't a literal Hip-Thrust, it's a throwing move in Martial Arts that someone usually uses on someone bigger than them_) and then a bar-arm, keeping Raphael on the floor in the threat his arm would be broken._

_"Make me pay for what I did to Angelo? Ha, how ironic; it wasn't I who broke his psyche." Saki taunted._

_Raphael growled "I didn't intentionally hurt him like you, Shredda'! You took advantage of him!"_

_Saki laughed "And I must thank you for that; I never could have done it if you hadn't given me something to take advantage of."_

_Raphael only growled in reply._

_"But then again, I can see why you did it." Saki continued._

_"What are you talkin' about?" Raphael demanded._

_"My ninja all tell me how good he is in bed." Saki said, a cruel smirk crossing his robotic face when he saw Raphael's amber eyes widen. "Oh, you didn't know? I had many of my ninja do to him exactly what you had done. The funny thing about it is, every time it happened, all he saw was __you.__"_

_(_**A/N: Okay, Saki's lying to get Raph mad, Mikey wasn't raped while in the Foot clan.**_)_

_Raphael's amber eyes burned with rage "You sick bastard!" He roared and swiftly slid his arm out of Saki's grip; he flipped onto his feet and struck Saki with a roundhouse kick._

_Saki slid several feet away but did not fall. Regaining posture, he withdrew his katana. Raphael made his sai spin in his palms and stopped them when the blades pointed back. _

_They charged at each other, every time they struck each others weapons they back off before striking again._

_"I'll make you pay, Shredda'!" Raphael growled, trapping Saki's katana blade between both of his sai, keeping them locked together._

_"Hmm…I promised my son I would let him deal with you, but I suppose he'll have to accept the pieces I leave behind." Saki said before doing a sweep-kick, knocking Raphael off balance._

_Raising his fist, he slammed it down on the top of Raphael's head and drove him to the ground._

_Raphael gnashed his teeth together when Saki held the tip of his katana blade to his throat; on the ground with a blade to his neck, he was at Saki's mercy._

_"I am going to enjoy this." Saki laughed and slammed his foot down on Raphael's plastron._

* * *

><p>(Two days later, present)<p>

Angelo bit his lip when he saw Raph in the condition he was in: dark bruises blotched his entire body, his arm was bent at an awkward angle and it appeared he had been stabbed in the shoulder. Scariest of all, he was conscious but he was still, not attempting to fight the Purple Dragons that were holding him up, he kept his head down as if he didn't have the strength to hold it up anymore.

"What is the meaning of this?" Angelo demanded. Hun smirked and tossed a Tanto at Angelo, which he caught.

"This piece of shit attacked the Shredder, he was lucky that the Shredder decided that he wouldn't kill him." Hun told him and crossed his huge arms, a twisted amused grin on his scarred face.

"And why's that?" Angelo asked coolly, a bead of sweat going down his eye ridge.

"He wanted you to do it, but we had to find you first. It wasn't easy, we had to scour the entire city, what is it you have been doing?"

"He wants me to kill him?" Angelo almost squeaked, not answering.

"He wants you to lob his head off, and present it in front of him. Go ahead, freak; it was revenge you wanted, wasn't it?"

Angelo looked at Raphael; so injured and pathetic-looking. Something in the center of Angelo's chest panged. Why was he feeling sorry for him? He wanted Raph to pay, so why not the ultimate price?

Angelo hesitantly raised the Tanto into the air.

"Any last words freak?" Hun asked Raph mockingly. In response, Raph spit blood and saliva into Hun's face.

"You little-!" Hun growled but didn't finish, he curled his fist back to punch Raph.

Suddenly a chain wrung around Hun's wrist. Hun looked and saw that Angelo had taken out one of his _chigiriki _and was using it to hold Hun's fist back. Angelo's eyes were a raging icy-blue and a foreboding aura surrounded him.

"Let's get one thing all of you, ugly, Glorified Purple Chickens." Angelo growled slowly "No one, and I mean **no one** is allowed to lay a finger on him, _except_ me!"

He took out his other _chigiriki _and hit Hun in the head with the iron ball.

The other Purple Dragon's immediately took offense.

"**GET HIM!**" Hun shouted, holding his head in pain.

Angelo swung the ball-and-chain of both his _chigiriki _wildly, a feral look was etched on his face, if looks could kill; the Purple Dragon's would be dead.

"**BRING IT ON YOU GLORIFIED PURPLE CHICKEN MOTHER FUCKERS!**" Angelo roared.

* * *

><p>Leo was getting worried; it was late afternoon and his mate had still yet to come home; he didn't rejoin the Shredder, did he? Did he really not care about any of them anymore?<p>

"Leo, pacing isn't gonna get Mikey here any faster," Don said from the couch, irritated "it's only going to scuff the floor."

"The floor was scuffed when we moved here." Leo retorted, earning a small chuckle from Don.

"What do you suppose Mikey actually does? It's not like he does the antics he used to do." Leo wondered aloud.

Don himself had been pretty curios about that, but before he could say anything they heard the sound of someone entering the lair.

"Mikey, where have you been?" Leo asked worryingly when he turned his head, but then his brown eyes widened.

Mikey was covered in blood, but Leo was pretty sure it wasn't his own. He was supporting someone with one of their arms around his shoulders. The person was bruised up and garbed in a large black jacket, but Leo recognized that person.

"Raph!" Leo and Don exclaimed in unison.

* * *

><p><em>Yup the point of Raph's training was so that he could defeat Shedder on his own; to get back at Shredder for brainwashing Mikey, and hopefully redeem himself in the eyes of his family. Somewhat it was also that he could make it up to Mikey.<em>

_And Raph's assult on the Shredder was some time during the day Leo told Mikey he loved him._


	24. Angelo tries a hand at forgiveness

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

* * *

><p>Pain inflamed his entire body; so much as breathing seemed to pull on <em>something <em>in pain. Even in his semi-unconscious state he could acknowledge it. He groaned and turned onto his aching side and winced when the earlier dull throbbing of discomfort became stronger with every passing second; great, he was coming to.

Weakly, amber eyes opened slowly and shut immediately from the intensity the light overhead held. Groaning, he forced himself to sit up on the cot he had been lying on and rubbed his eyes to adjust to the brightness.

He studied his surroundings; how was he in Don's lab? Then he studied himself; his plastron, shoulder and legs were covered in bandages, in the places he wasn't bandaged he was heavily bruised. One of his arms was in a sling too, broken.

"Raph! You're awake!" An excited voice chimed into his brain and someone threw their arms around him.

"Ow! Don, ease up on da grip!" Raph hissed painfully; the lightest touches made him hurt even more, Raph turned his head to his genius brother. "How did I get here? Last thing I remember….." he trailed off and tried to collect his memories.

_He had been training… He fought the Shredder….. The Shredder beat him….. Captured him….. Put him through 'training' for two days… Passed out after a gruesome 'spar' with scores of Foot ninja and Foot tech ninja…. He'd gotten stabbed in the shoulder ….Then it was all dark, all he remembered with several different colored moving blurs; the kind of things people see whenever there high on some sort of designer drug... And somewhat familiar voice telling him to put a jacket on._

"Raph, what happened?" Don asked and put his hand on Raph's uninjured shoulder.

"...Something stupid Don, something really, really stupid; I thought I had the whole thing planned out but everything went wrong." Raph explained, his gaze fleeting from Don in shame.

Don was a silent; a gesture for Raph to continue.

"When Karai told us everythin' that happened with Mikey in da Foot…. Believe bro, I was way beyond pissed, I got dis idea dat I would get back at da Shredda'." Raph admitted, he gripped the white sheets of the cot tightly.

"Was that the real reason behind your training?" Don asked him suspiciously.

"Yeah; I was trainin' ta use different way 'a fighting since the Shredda' already knew how I fought; throwin' my weight around ta move fasta', usin' more defense den offense. But I didn't train good enough, the Shredda' beat me and…."

"And, what then?"

"Don, to be honest, before I thought Mikey was bein' over-dramatic with his new personality. But now I get it; it was Hell, Donnie, and my head wasn't messed up like his was, I can't imagine what it was like for him."

"Raph, what the shell are you getting at?"

"The Shredda' put me through da same trainin' he put Mikey through….. He didn't want to recruit me; he just wanted me to suffer. I….. Don, how could Mikey have survived that? I was only in dere for two days and I feel like I've been through Hell and back, anotha' week there and I woulda' been dead for sure."

Silence dragged on; Donnie looked at his brother in shock; he tried to take the Shredder on single-handed?

"Raph….Why did you try to fight the Shredder?" Don finally asked.

"It's just ….. Yeah, what I did was bad, unforgivable; but the Shredder made it way worse den it could have been! He put Mikey through Hell, messed wit' his head and he….. He had the Foot ninja rape him, Don! I … I wanted to make it up ta him Don, I thought I could make things right if I could kill the Shredda' for what he did. I thought I would somehow redeem myself by accomplishing dat."

Donnie's eyes were wide as he tried absorbing what his brother had just told him.

Raph looked at him, his face mask less making his expression more open, he looked tired, disappointed and ashamed "How did you guys find me?" He asked; he remembered the Purple Dragon's dragging him to an alley, he couldn't remember what was said but he faintly remembered on of the voices being faintly familiar.

"Mikey saved you."

Raph looked at Don as if he had two heads. "Wh-What?"

"That's right; instead of doing the smart thing a lobbing your head off, I decided to save your sorry shell." A new voice said from the doorway, Don and Raph turned and saw Mikey was casually leaning the door frame, his arms crossed and his gaze locked on Raph.

"But…Why? I thought ya hated me." Raph asked; his voice a little quiet; he was still weary from when Mikey tried to rape him.

"More then you can believe." Mikey mumbled and narrowed his blue-gray eyes.

"That's not an answa'." Raph said; his macho façade returning.

"Yo, Donnie; mind leaving? I'd like to talk to hothead here alone." Mikey said to Don, though looking a little weary himself the purple-masked genius nodded and left.

Mikey made his way to the cot and leaned against the wall the cot was backed up against.

"Why'd ya save me?" Raph asked and tried to make eye contact with his black-masked brother "You tried ta kill me twice before; you were given da chance ta finally do it but ya chose ta save me instead."

"Damn stupid choice too." Mikey mumbled darkly but then returned the eye contact, but his eyes revealed no emotion. "Truth to be told; I have no idea why I didn't kill you while I had the chance; or why I saved you. I guess when I saw you …. I felt pretty sorry for you, it reminded me of the training the Shredder made me do. But that makes sense now; you did say he subjected you to the same training."

"How did you survive that for a year?" Raph blurted out; he had to know.

A distant look crossed Mikey's features "I wanted to die so bad; but they tortured me by letting me live. The first eight months were the worse, at the end of every day when Chaplin patched me up, I wondered if I would be able to make it the next day. The days, weeks and months just started to blurr together because of the Disorder I started to contract. Oh and by the way, Shredder was lying if he told you I was raped while I was the Foot; some tried but in the end I killed them. I guess what kept me going was the thought that one day it would be all worth it and I would kill you."

Raph flinched, he was a little relieved to hear that Mikey hadn't been raped though.

"Really contradicts, doesn't it?" Mikey continued "I wanted to kill you so bad, or make you suffer; you actually suffer, and I have the chance to kill you but instead I save your life."

Silence.

"Mikey?" Raph asked.

Mikey closed his eyes and 'hmmm?'ed calmly.

"I …I'm really sorry Mikey! I'm really, really, really, truly sorry!" Raph told him quickly "I didn't mean to dat ta' ya bro! I was stupid, trying to prove myself to Casey by drinkin' or not listening when you told me I shouldn't drink in the morning! Mikey, you don't have to forgive me, but I'll somehow make dis up to you; I'll try the rest of my life if I have to, honest! I'm so sorry!" Raph was starting to babble.

Mikey looked to the floor and waited for Raph to get done. When he was, Mikey sighed and turned to him; his eyes were blue and rather than appear stoic he looked sort of scared. He must have been normal Mikey.

"Raph; I might never be able to forgive you, but if you were willing to try and kill the Shredder just to make it up to me, then I'll be willing to try." He said quietly, his voice somewhat hoarse but it held a familiar surfer accent. Then he looked at Raph with teary eyes "It hurt Raph; it really did, a lot; physically, and mentally. Worse of all; I'm not even sure if I can trust you, my own brother, ever again! But dude, I can't hold a grudge on you forever, no matter how much you hurt me, you're my brother."

Hesitantly, Mikey held out his fist (Big step for him, being afraid of Raphael and physical contact when he's in his right mind) Raph gave Mikey a small smile and bumped his fist with his own.

Dark gray shades returned to Mikey's eyes, he turned around "I gotta go." He said coldly and left a little quickly.

Raph put his hands on his lap; guilt and shame still strong, but he felt something else, something that was making the darkness of those emotions ease up a little.

It was hope.

* * *

><p><em>The story isn't over yet people; this was just a plot point.<em>

_How will Raph react to Mikey and Leo's relationship? Will Don ever get with Leo? Will Mikey ever truly return? What will Shredder do when he hears about Angelo's tretchery? And what happened to Hun and the Purple Dragon's anyways? What of Karai and Chaplin?_


	25. Leo tries a hand at showing his love

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

* * *

><p>A week had passed since Mikey had come back with Raph: Mikey was officially over withdrawal (As in he was no longer dependant on the pills and didn't suffer the effects of substance absence), though it wasn't over; without the pills, it appeared he was having personality shifts again.<p>

As of three days ago they had come to Casey's Grandmothers farmhouse, Casey and April were with them, so was Leatherhead (Donnie had talked him into coming – Leatherhead himself had Post-Traumatic problems from being tortured by Bishop, so hopefully he could help Mikey learn how to control his shifting personality).

They hoped that if they went to the Farmhouse things could settle over a little; though, Raph and Mikey still kept space between each other, and Raph knew nothing of Leo and Mikey's relationship. No one was sure how to break the news to Raph so as of yet no one had told him.

Leo currently was returning from a trek in the woods: No one should have been home, Raph, Don and Splinter were training, April and Casey were picking up groceries the next town over and Leatherhead and Mikey were swimming in the river.

The blue-masked turtle entered the farmhouse and saw some items on the living room table that hadn't been there before; a pair of _chigiriki, _a _Jumonji-Yari _and a black mask. What was Mikey's stuff doing there? Curiously, Leo searched for his mate around the farmhouse; not in the kitchen, not in the back yard, not in the bedrooms.

Finally, Leo came up to the attic; quietly he snuck up the stairs and peeked from the top step of the stairs. Indeed, Mikey was there. He was lying stretched out on his side in the large, bright patch of sunlight on the floor that the window offered, his shell turned to Leo. He must have been basking. As expected, he was weaponless and wasn't wearing his mask.

A small smile came onto Leo's face; ever since they'd captured him he'd never been this relaxed before, he had always been constantly on edge and high alert. It was nice to see him finally loosen up. He was definitely starting to recover.

A happy churr escaped his mates throat, which brought Leo out of his trance and quietly he snuck up behind the younger turtle. When Leo was close enough he heard a slow and quiet pattern of breathing from the other; he was asleep.

Leo looked over him; Klunk was curled against Mikey's chest, like her owner she was asleep. Mikey had a small smile on his relaxed face; something Leo hadn't seen for so long (Under the guise of Angelo he only went as far as smirking). It made Leo's heart grow warm and expanded through his chest.

The sword-wielder slowly got down into the wide patch of light: the mask less turtle stirred but didn't awake, not even when Leo, lying behind him now, adjusted him to lie in his arms.

Leo pressed the back of Mikey's body against his plastron and allowed his body to loosen up; no wonder Mikey had been lying in the sunlight like this, it felt really good. Soon the warm hands of tiredness gripped his body and he was falling asleep himself.

"I love you, Mikey." Leo whispered and settled the others head in the crook of his neck. Through his sleep Mikey snuggled against his mate.

And they stayed like that, at peace in each others presence. Even with all the past – and future – chaos, in that moment all seemed right in the world, at least to them.

* * *

><p>Angelo yawned and opened his eyes; he hadn't slept that comfortably in over a year and now he felt at so much ease. But wait, was someone holding him when he fell asleep?<p>

Instantly, his Aphenphosmphobia (Fear of being touched/fear of physical contact) flared up. He squirmed to escape the grasp, not bothering to look to see who was holding him; he was sure it wasn't Karai.

"Mikey?...What's wrong?" A sleepy voice asked, Angelo realized it was none other than his mate. He was still visibly shaking but he forced himself to not squirm; Leo was safe.

"Leo, when did you get here?" Angelo asked, almost tripping over his words.

"I came back and found you up here; your stuff was in the living room. Why weren't you with Leatherhead?" Leo told him with a yawn; he sat up but brought Angelo up with him, Angelo tried to get comfortable by resting his head against Leo's plastron, reminding himself that there was nothing to be scared of.

"We were swimming in the river – but I got cold, Leatherhead was worried I would catch a fever or something so he sent me back to get warm; I left my mask and weapons on the table because they were wet. I guess I feel asleep here." Angelo answered, careful to keep his voice level.

"Is Leatherhead still swimming?"

"He's a _crocodile, _Leo; what do you think?" Angelo scoffed playfully and pushed Leo back. That caused Leo to fall back on the floor, pulling Angelo down with him forcing the mask less turtle to fall on him. Klunk woke up and scurried out of the room.

In slight shock they looked at each other in the eye.

Something between them sparked out.

* * *

><p>"We're back." Raph called as he re-entered the farmhouse with Don behind him and frowned; where was everyone? Was no one else really there? "Huh, looks like it's just us."<p>

"No, look; those are Mikey's." Donnie said and pointed at the living room table where his black mask and Foot weapons lay.

Raph instantly went mute; Don was still really mad at Raph and extremely over-protective over Mikey; if Raph got so much as 5 yards close to him, Don would take out his Bo staff and slam it in front of Mikey in defense. With his new personality, you would expect him to tell Donnie 'lay off, I can protect myself' but rather he seemed to appreciate it; he was still very anxious around Raph.

Suddenly, an orange blur ran down the stairs from the attic; it was Klunk. Don and Raph then heard a slamming noise from the attic.

Raph was instantly on the offense; he took out his sai's and ran up the stairs to see what was going on, Don followed.

"Raph? Something wrong?" Don asked in concern when he caught up to Raph; who had stopped abruptly at the top of the stairs. Raph was still and silent, in fact he actually dropped his sai's.

Don peeked into the room.

In a nearby corner were Mikey and Leo. Mikey backed up against the corner in a half sitting-up position; he was moaning and his eyes were closed. Leo was between his legs, his arms wrapped around the other turtles body, his mouth and teeth were latched on Mikey's neck. Both were blissfully unaware of their brothers.

Don glanced nervously at Raph; whose eyes were wide as the moon and his jaw almost down to the floor, shock etched on his dark-green features. Don wasn't sure how Raph would react when he came back to his senses; after all, he didn't know about Leo and Mikey being mates. One of the reasons Don found it hard to tell Raph was because he still had feelings for Mikey. So how would Raph take this?

He got his answer rather quickly;

"**WHAT THE SHELL? !**" Raph roared, Mikey and Leo didn't have enough time to react because Raph charged at Leo and tackled him. That itself was amazing, consitering Raph's arm being broken.

_God help Leo, _Thought Donnie.

* * *

><p><em>Well now Raph knows, what's next?<em>

_Read, Review, get the next chapter and find out!_


	26. Why he can't change back

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

* * *

><p>Donnie came to Mikey's side; the currently mask-less turtle was staring at Raph and Leo with his blue eyes distant and glazed over. His mind returning to his flashbacks.<p>

"Mikey," Don said and gently shook his brothers shoulders "Don't space out, you might have an episode." Over withdrawal did not mean no episodes; the pills he took were made so that he would _stop _having episodes after all.

Slowly a look of consciousness returned to Mikey's features. When he glanced at Raph and Leo again he tensed up and dark gray shades clouded his eyes up again. Before Don could stop him, he snarled and jumped at the two fighting turtles. He barreled Raph over, off of Leo and ripped one of Raph's sai off of his belt.

The distant look was again contained in Mikey's eyes; definite episode, he must have been re-enacting another flashback. Like Zeus holding a lightning bolt to strike down the disobedient, Mikey raised Raph's sai high up and slammed it down.

The sai was dangerously close to Raph's throat; luckily Don took a swift hold of Mikey's wrist to stop him from gutting Raph. "Mikey! Get a hold of yourself! Remember where you are!"

In response Mikey jumped Donnie and attempted to attack _him. _Leo, though a little bruised up from Raph's assault, was instantly on his feet. He flung himself at Mikey and held him tightly in a sort of embrace.

Mikey kept trying to attempting to break free, squirming frequently and twisting around. Leo kept firm held and continually whispered "Its okay Mikey, you're not in the Foot anymore. You're with us, you're safe." Gradually Mikey's protests weakened and he went limp when Leo started rocking a little.

Blue-gray eyes regained the shine of consciousness, the episode was over.

Don helped the shocked Raphael back onto his feet.

A growl tore from Raph's throat as he angrily pointed at Leo "Mind tellin' me why ya mouth was all ova' our little brotha's _neck? _What's wrong wit' you?"

Leo glared back at Raph and tightened his grip around Mikey in a almost possessive way. "_What's wrong with me? _What's wrong with _you _is a better question! You attacked me!"

Raph took out his remaining sai and got into an offensive stance "Because ya were tryin' ta force yaself on Mikey!"

Don flinched when anger crossed Leo usually calm demeanor. "_I WOULD NEVER DO THAT!_" Leo shouted, Mikey flinched a little too (Then again, that probably had something to do with Leo shouting literally next to his ear….err, whatever the Hell it is they use to hear.)

"Actions speak louda' den words, Leo! I saw what ya were doin'!" Raph shouted back. Don didn't have time to break the news to Raph, he didn't have to: Leo did it for him.

"HE'S MY MATE, SHELL-FOR-BRAINS!" Leo roared.

There was a _clatter _as Raph dropped his remaining sai; disbelief written all over his face; he seemingly lost control in his legs because he wobbled a bit when he took a step back. "W-What did'ja just say?"

Mikey suddenly thrust one of his arms out and pushed Leo away rudely. Ferociously he glared at Raph. "You heard right." He stated lowly "I'm Leo's mate now, got a _problem _with it?" He challenged.

"Mikey-!" Don warned.

"Shut up." Mikey cut him off rudely, and then walked away towards the stairs.

"Where are you going?" Don asked, puzzled and a little hurt.

"Leave me alone! I can handle myself; I'm not made of fucking _glass._." Mikey snapped and like a bullet was off; seconds later they heard the front door slam shut.

Don whirled around angrily and glared at his two older brothers. "You _idiots._" He hissed with his hands curled into fists.

At that moment, Raph would rather have taken his chances with the Shredder again rather than his over-protective genius brother. No really, if he had a choice he would have chosen the Shredder.

* * *

><p>Angelo was swiftly dashing in the forest; past the trees and over shrubs; occasionally leaping to create more distance. Tears burned his eyes but he refused to let them fall; he'd humiliated himself in front of them enough times when he was going through withdrawal he wasn't going to lose any more pride over more water works.<p>

Damn, what had he become anyways?

Angelo came to a firm stop and sat on a conveniently placed boulder and withdrew into his thoughts.

What _had _he become? Was he Homato Michaelangelo; son of Splinter, the youngest of the Hamato clan and the most immature of his team? Or was he still Oroku Angelo; terror of the Foot clan, cold Foot ninja and brother of Oroku Karai?

He wasn't who he was over a year ago; his personality wounded by Raph and finally destroyed by the Shredder; he hated comics now, Junk food is considered a sin, video games are pointless, TV is boring, being lazy and he was 'trained' to feel that being lazy or immature would bear punishment.

But weeks ago he had been Angelo: Cold, borderline psychotic and sadistic, more than willing to hurt his family in a quest for revenge. Mostly quiet, sarcastic, insensitive and uncaring if he was dead or alive. Loyal Foot ninja, trained to be far ahead of his brothers.

In all honesty; he didn't want to lose his Angelo personality; it was the only personality he had left since his former one was impossible to regain. Literally, every time he had failed a move or made a one-liner he could _feel _the electricity burn his wrists.

Unconsciously, Angelo pulled one of his wristbands off and stared at his wrist; in the entire area the metal bands once where the skin was badly burn-scarred, it had scared him just as much as it had Donnie and Leo.

He felt like he was losing control of himself again; like he was _letting _those around him influence and change his personality again, make him different enough that he wouldn't recognize himself.

Angelo shut his eyes and unwilling tears streamed down his cheeks; it wasn't fair, in the Foot clan they forced him to be 'Angelo', but now back with his family they were trying to change him too; try to make him become his former self even though that feat would be impossible. He didn't trust them enough to willingly change.

Seeing Leo and Raph fight like that, it brought back bad memories: being pinned was Angelo's #1 weakness, it either made him freeze up in horror and go extremely ballistic with rage. All of the Foot knew it, only Karai and Chaplin understood it. Seeing other people get pinned also made him ballistic; first he'd flashback to _that _day and without thinking he would then tear the person pinning someone down off. The Foot lost several of their ninja that way, because unlike here, there was no one in the Foot clan to hold him back like Don had.

Even if he was afraid of Raph, that fear was over-ruled by his protectiveness when seeing people pinned; it was heightened by an overbearing need to protect his mate. Who the hell did Raph think he was anyways? Angelo was just finally being a bit more physical with Leo and Raph freaks out.

_Raph reacted like that because he still loves you, _a familiar voice rang in his head; great, his Donnie-sounding conscience was back.

**Love doesn't exist, **Angelo mentally replied coldly, choosing to not listen to the voice. Angelo hopped off of the rock. Why should he care about Raph anyways? _Leo _was his mate and Raph won't ruin that: it was bad enough that Angelo can't get physically far because of him, he wasn't going to lose his mate too.

"Mikey?" Don's somewhat distant voice called from somewhere else in the forest.

Shaking his head, Angelo started off towards the direction of Don's voice.

**Love doesn't exist, **he reminded himself, just to assure himself it was true. He wasn't sure anymore.

Great, just great he was losing even more control of his current personality.

* * *

><p><em>So this is Raph's reaction: Yeah, good luck with that Leo.<em>

_The plot point of this chapter was to bring into light that it's even harder for Angelo to open up towards him family and change because he isn't willing to lose control of his personality again because the last time he 'let' someone do that, it was the Shredder and he became Angelo._


	27. Don tries a hand at honesty

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

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><p>Don was wondering around in the woods, calling out for Mikey who'd earlier ran out of the farmhouse; Don knew he should probably give him space but he didn't want Mikey to drift away from them before he even got close.<p>

"Mikey! Where are you?" Don called, his voice echoed through the woods.

"Mi-AHHH!" Don was about to call again but Mikey appeared in front of him all of a sudden; no, he didn't appear out of nowhere with a 'poof' and a smoke cloud like the new-age ninja's do, instead he's opted to jump down from the tree branches overhead. Nearly gave Don a heart attack.

"Wussup?" Mikey asked casually as if he'd just strolled over instead of almost giving his brother a heart attack.

"The sky, the sun, the clouds." Don panted, his hand on his plastron in an dramatic you-just-gave-me-a-heart-attack gesture.

"Oh ha ha," Mikey said with a smirk and gave Don a playful shove "Like I haven't heard that one; you should be a little more original."

The two brothers stood face-to-face in silence for a few moments, both unsure of what to say or do.

"Hey, Don?" Mikey broke the silence.

"Yeah?"

"You wanna go for a walk? And you know….Talk...?" He practically had to force the word 'talk' out.

Don smiled a little. "Sure." He replied.

Mikey took the lead, Don trailed behind him. Don unwillingly stared at the slash-gouge on the back of Mikey's shell. Acting on unexplained impulse, he reached out and ran his hand on it. Mikey body arched up and he tensed for a second; in an instant he whirled around and crushed Donnie's hand in a death grip with his own. He glared intensely at his brother.

Don flinched as he felt the boned of his hands buckle under the pressure. "Mikey, that hurts…" His voice was soft to reach out to Mikey's better nature.

Mikey let go and turned back around "J-Just don't do that, okay? Every time I feel or even look at a scar; I remember exactly how I got it." The still mask-less turtle paced ahead once more; but this time just a little bit faster.

Don followed and stayed silent.

* * *

><p>The two brothers continued to walk in silence for the next half-hour; dusk was drawing in but that was okay, they were used to the darkness and night.<p>

"What… Happened while I was gone?" Mikey suddenly asked, his eyes still directed ahead but occasionally swept to the ground.

Don blinked and thought for a minute before answering "Things were …. Really boring without you and everyone missed you; in fact, just because you weren't around Raph was practically _never _in the lair."

Mikey flinched at the mention of his red-masked brother; Don could feel the waves of anxiety radiating off of him.

"Leo was still the same; he acted like nothing happened; but he's _Leo, _it's not what he didn't feel, it's what he didn't show. He felt like if he wasn't stable, none of us would be." Don continued.

"Master Splinter was always trying to help us deal with your absence. But he felt the loss too; every time he heard a loud noise he would come into the living room thinking you had returned."

A small smile flicked on Mikey's face before a serious look returned "What about you?"

Don was silent, he stopped walking.

Mikey stopped a couple of paces ahead. "Donnie?" He called.

Donnie looked straight at Mikey, who was staring at him in puzzlement. "I missed you more then you'll believe; there was no one trying to draw me out of my shell, or take me out on wacky misadventures, or insisting I do other things than hang around my lab" Donnie admitted sadly. "For a long time I thought Life was a dream, and my dreams were Life: I would always sleep because in my dreams you weren't gone and everything was alright. The day we 'found' you I thought it was a nightmare. But when I feel asleep that night, things really were a nightmare and I realized my dreams weren't reality. Get me?"

Suddenly Mikey was in his space bubble; (Don still couldn't believe that Mikey had become taller than him in the past year) and he wrapped his unscarred arms around his body in a comforting hug. Don was a little limp at first but returned the hug.

"I missed you too Donnie; you were my brother and best friend." Mikey told him, Donnie was amazed that he wasn't shaking; wasn't he afraid of physical contact? "I know I've been a real jerk to you lately, but I want you to understand this: I don't think I can really trust any of you guys, not you, not Leo, not Master Splinter and especially not Raph. While I was in Japan I thought I could trust some of the Ninja but then they tried to kill me with no regrets. The only people I could every really trust was Karai and Chaplin; then again, Chaplin said it had something to do with 'my mind imprinting Karai as comfort since she encountered me in the beginning stages of trauma' or some psychological crap like that."

"Mikey we're your family, why can't you trust us, when you can trust Karai?" Donnie whispered, his voice slowly becoming rougher.

"You guys really don't understand Karai; she was abandoned as a child by her real parents and the Shredder is the only family she's ever known. Think of it this way, even if Master Splinter was evil and we chose to not follow him; at least we would have _each other. _Who would Karai have?" Mikey told him. "Right now I am really testing her loyalty since she has an alternative."

Don was silent; he'd never thought of it that way, so it really wasn't just the 'duty-bound' reasoning she always spouted; it was deeper than that?

"And another thing; I can't _fully_ trust you guys, because I know you don't _fully _trust me either." Mikey scoffed and withdrew from the hug; but his arms were outstretched to hold Don's shoulders.

"What? We gave you space, we gave you your weapons and we let Karai visit you even though she's an enemy!" Dona argued.

Mikey rolled his eyes "Don, do you _really _think I don't know you spike my food with sedative?"

Don's eyes widened and he opened his mouth to argue but Mikey cut him off.

"Don't try to hide it; I could _smell _the sedative, dude. I mean, the Foot sedated me more times then I can count; I'm surprised my neck doen't have any holes in it from all the darts. Why do you think I kept refusing to eat anything you touched?"

The purple-masked genius looked a little guilty.

"But you were being cautious; it only makes sense you wouldn't fully trust me; I attacked you guys, I tried to kill Raph twice and….you know…" Mikey trailed off and turned his head to the side.

"I didn't want you to get too violent; I thought the sedative would keep you calm." Don admitted dryly. Mikey chuckled a little.

"Good call; I must have tried to kill each of you guys at least once when I was having an episode, I can't remember any of them though. I think you guys drugged me with _something _every other day."

Silence once more, Mikey drew away; his discomfort with physical contact returning. "I really did miss you Don; and this is me thinking straight; as Homatao Michaelangelo, Oroku Angelo or whoever the hell I am, but whoever it is, I know that I missed you while I was in Japan."

"Thanks Mikey." Don said with a sigh and they continued to walk.

"Oh and by the way, Mikey?"

"Yeah?"

"I have something for you."

"What's that?"

Don produced something from under his belt; he held it out clasped in his hand. Mikey held his hand out open and Don dropped it in his palm.

Puzzled, Mikey held the item in front of him; it was his orange mask that he'd discarded weeks ago.

"Do you think you can come back to our family?" Don asked in a hopeful tone.

Mikey looked between the mask and Don several times, a few times he glanced at the Foot tattoo on his shoulder. His eyes contantly shifted blue and gray shades.

Finally, he slowly drew the mask to his face and tied it around his eyes. "Never been more ready Don."

Together they turned around and headed back to the farmhouse.

* * *

><p><em>Yeah, this was supposed to be a brotherly moment.<em>

_This was also meant to explain why Don slept so much while Mikey was gone: He thought reality was his dreams, so he slept to escape his 'dreams' and dream up a better 'reality'. Make sense?_


	28. When life gives you apples

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

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><p>"Mikey, would you go to the top of the tree and get the cluster up there?" April requested, holding half-full wicker basket of apples in her arms.<p>

"Sure thing." Mikey replied flatly and leapt onto the apple tree. Once he got to the top he held up his _chigiriki. _With a smirk he whacked the branch holding a cluster of apples and called out "INCOMMING!" Just as the apples rained down.

Casey was right under that branch and heard Mikey too late; the apples rained down on him. "AHH! OW! OW! OW!" He shouted with every apple that landed on his head; if only it were coconuts, it would be way funnier. But this was funny too; every time he tried to get out of the way of a falling apple a different one would land right on his crown.

"Yo! Not cool!" Casey shouted after the apple assault ended; in response Mikey threw an apple at him; hit him right in the forehead. Lucky for the already hard-headed Casey the forehead is the hardest part of the head so it wouldn't do any real damage. Unluckily for him; the collision made the apple turn to paste all over his head.

"What'd I eva' do ta you?" Casey angrily demanded and wiped the half apple-sauce off his face.

Suddenly the raven-haired man was backed up against an apple tree with Mikey holding the spear-head of his _Jumonji-Yari _dangerously close to Casey's chest. The anger and resentment was painfully obvious in Mikey's expression, almost as obvious as the fear on Casey's.

Mikey brought his face close to Casey and growled lowly "You make me want to _puke._" Then he poked Casey in the ribcage with the tip of the spear-head "I don't like _you _or _your face_."

Raph was watching whilst leaning against the trunk of another apple tree as April put Mikey on another task to get him away from her husband. On any other day he would have attempted to help his friend but he got where Mikey was coming from.

"Dude," Casey said as he came up to Raph, still visibly shaking "Why didn't'cha help me? He looked like he was gonna gut me and serve me ova' an open fire!"

"He blames us both, Case." Raph answered flatly; Casey got what he meant by that.

"Why's he blamin' me? You're the one who couldn't keep your cock in ya damn shell!" Casey snapped and instantly regretted it because for the second time in the past five minutes he was backed up against an apple tree by a pissed off ninja turtle.

"Yeah, but _you're _da one who talked an _eighteen-year-old _ta be ya drinkin' buddy." Raph hissed, his hands curled into tight fists.

(**A/N: Yup, Mikey hates Casey almost as much as he hates Raph because he knows it was Casey who talked Raph into getting drunk. Did anyone else realize that a big part of this was Casey's fault? I, the author, didn't even realize this until recently!**)

Casey gulped and shut his mouth (Meanwhile, it's snowing in Hell)

Raph stalked away with his sai held tightly in his fists. The need to break something getting stronger with every passing second.

Out of nowhere Mikey's _Jumonji-Yari _stabbed into the ground right in front of Raphael; who nearly jumped out of his shell in alarm.

Mikey walked up and un-staked his weapon from the ground.

"What was dat for?" Raph demanded. Mikey raised an eye ridge.

"What? I only wanted an apple." He said and in demonstration pointed at the apple stabbed into the spear-head.

"Ya nearly gutted me wit' dat!" Raph argued and held up a fist.

"What can I say? My aim was a little off." Mikey excused with an evil smirk. He took a bite from the impaled apple then walked away. If you listened hard enough you could hear Mikey mentally laughing evilly.

Heart still thudding hard in his chest from surprise, Raph glared at the apple tree and threw his sai at it; it stabbed into an apple. Well….Unfortunately, for some weird reason the apple didn't fall down.

Raph growled and stamped his feet down in anger.

"What a hard case." Don said to Leo from several yards away.

"He's our hard case, Don… He's our hard case." Leo said with a sigh.

Mikey, who was standing next to Don, chuckled a little.

"What possessed you to freak him out anyways, Mikey?" Don asked the younger turtle.

"Hey, it was you guys who wanted me to act the childish way I used to; so I figured I'd play a prank." Mikey told him and took a huge bite out of his maimed apple.

"What, was putting superglue on our weapons too overrated?" Leo joked, well he might have been joking; it's Leo for gods' sake, even if he's joking he sounds serious.

Mikey swallowed and replied "Who says I haven't done that?"

"What do you-?" Don asked but was cut off by loud shouting.

"WHY THE SHELL WON'T DIS STUPID FRUIT COME OFF?" Shouted Raph as he constantly shook his sai that was stabbed into the apple; but the offending red fruit would not come off, so instead he started slamming it against the trunk of a tree; pounding the innocent apple into paste.

Leo and Don instantly snapped their gaze to Mikey, who had a half-innocent half-evil smirk across his face.

"Look at it this way guys; I haven't lost my touch." Said the smirking orange-masked turtle with a shrug.

Though they shook their heads and rolled their eyes, they still smiled; there was still hope for their Mikey after all.

At the same time they prayed to the highest force that Raph would _stay_ the brunt of Mikey's new pranks.

* * *

><p><em>This was meant to be a chapter that wouldn't be serious or angsty like the other ones; it was sopposed to be a family moment chapter. However, every family with problems always has it's drama; hense the hate Mikey has for Casey. <em>


	29. The scent of Blood and Fear

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

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><p>"Home sweet home." Donnie mused as he and his family continued to wade down the shallow waters of the sewer. Master Splinter at the lead, followed by Mikey and Leo, Don close behind and Raph (Who's arm was finally healed up.) purposely lagging behind: more than ever the red-masked turtle has been alienating himself from the family, the guilt and anger eating him up from the inside.<p>

"Yeah; cold, drippy sewer water, darkness and a stink up to high Heaven: doesn't it just scream 'solace'?" Mikey scoffed playfully.

Don caught up and gave Mikey a playful shove "What, using big words now?" He teased.

Mikey gave him a smirk "_Orokana musuko wa kashikoi musume yori mo sugurete imasu_." He retorted and crossed his arms, giving Donnie a look that seemed to say 'what now?'.

Splinter and Leo stared at him; they had understood what he had just said in Japanese. Don however, who never had too much interest in Japan, was stumped.

Don turned to Leo "What did he just say?"

"Donnie, you really don't want me to answer that…..But Mikey; that's a Chinese proverb, not a Japanese one. And Don isn't even a _daughter._"

Mikey shrugged with his smirk still intact. "Could have fooled me."

Don may not have understood what Mikey said in Japanese, but he did now know that Mikey was calling him a girl."Hey! You little-!" Don snapped and took out his Bo Staff, then chased Mikey with it. Chuckling the entire time; Mikey ran away from Don.

Master Splinter and Leo looked at each other and smiled; things really were getting more normal. Well, normally it'd be Raph chasing Mikey after a remark like that, but this was nice too.

"So uh…What exactly did he say anyways?" Raph asked, still several yards behind.

"For Don's sake; it's really best not to tell." Leo told him, Master Splinter nodded and they continued on their way back to the Lair.

* * *

><p>"Hey, did we leave the lights on when we left?" Raph asked as they entered the lair; sure enough the living room lights were on.<p>

"I'm pretty sure I turned them off." Leo replied. The blue-masked leader looked around the Lair; it wasn't this messy either….

Mikey suddenly took a sharp inhale and a growl tore from his throat. Alertness took control of his movements; he whipped out his _Jumonji-Yari _and held it out protectively in front of his family. His kept turning his head and looking in all directions.

"What's wrong, Mikey?" Don asked, concerned and suspicious; something was definitely off about the Lair and Mikey could sense it.

"Blood." Mikey growled, his blue-gray eyes narrowed "I can smell it; this place reeks of blood and fear."

Master Splinter sniffed the air and his own body tense up "You are right – someone is here."

All of the turtles withdrew their weapons.

"How the shell do you know what fear smells like?" Leo asked his mate, though being serious he was curious as well.

Mikey didn't look at him but replied "When you're in the Foot, you learn things you don't want to learn." His voice was tight and razor-sharp.

The family was about to rush around and search for whatever had intruded their Lair, but they were stopped.

"Wait!" Mikey hissed and shot one of his arms out in halt. "Look over there." He pointed in at the (open) entrance to Don's lab where someone was lying on the ground.

They hurried over and huddled around the shape; the person was lying on the front of their body and looked as though he had fallen and not gotten back up, a small puddle of blood surrounded him.

Mikey recognized him instantly. "Chaplin!" He shouted in alarm and crouched next to him; after rolling him over, he lifted the genius's head with one arm and supported his back with the other. "Chaplin! Wake up!" He demanded and shook the red-head.

Chaplin's brown eyes opened half-way; they were glazed over and filled with fear. Chaplin was covered in bruises, there were deep cuts all over his body and his ripped up clothing was coated in his own blood.

"Who did this to you?" Mikey demanded.

In response, the weakened genius gripped onto Mikey's arms and shakily replied "…..Shredder…Knows…Karai…..They…..Got…Her…..Betrayal…_Help_….." with those long-drawn, shaky, fear-filled words spoken he went limp and blacked out in Mikey's arms.

Mikey turned to Donnie "Don't just stand there! He needs medical attention!" He roughly told him and got onto his feet and carried him into Don's lab, Don followed rushed for his medical supplies.

"Stay with me, my friend." Mikey whispered to his unconscious friend and turned to Donnie "I know what he meant Don, I know what he meant." He said in a dreadful tone of voice.

"Huh?" Don said, he hadn't heard Mikey because he was too busy looking over Chaplin's injuries.

"The Shredder knows, Don." Mikey said quietly in anguish "He knows Karai betrayed him; they have her and she needs our help and by the looks of things," he glanced at Chaplin "_he _was lucky to get away with his life."

* * *

><p><em>The Shredder Knows! Oh no! Karai is captured! Chaplin is near death; Angelo ain't pleased.<em>

_Oh and Mikey said a Chinese proverb in Japanese; he said "A stupid son is better than a clever daughter" he was calling Donnie a daughter. Yeah, really good thing Donnie doesn't speak fluently in Japanese like Leo and Master Splinter. Who actually saw this comming? Angelo has been in **Japan **for over a **year: **it only makes sense he speaks some Japanese!_

_Oh and by the way, I was listening to Music one day and I finally found a song thatfits Angelo perfectly! 'Pet' by a Perfect Circle; It goes between him and the Shredder and how the Shredder brainwashed him and convinced him he was only trying to make him a better ninja._


	30. I gotta do somethin' to help my brotha'

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

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><p><em><strong>Smack Smack Smack Smack! <strong>_The sound continually rang through the Lair as Mikey mercilessly pounded the punching bag with his fists and feet (And occasionally his body) in anger. His expression was a twisted mix of anguish and anger, he was striking fast and violently as if the punching bag itself was the root of his problems.

Raph watched worryingly from the living room couch, he couldn't pay attention to the wrestling match on TV; his focus stayed on his little brother.

Don was busy looking over Chaplin for any internal injuries while Leo was talking with Master Splinter in the dojo over the matter of what to do next, both were probably meditating right now. No one dare get close to Mikey when he was in a rage like this; he was bad enough when he was 'normal'.

But Raph knew that it wasn't healthy for Mikey to continue wailing on the punching bag; already his fists were bruised, he was sweating profusely, his breathing was heavy and uneven; he'd been at this for the past _five hours…_

Bravely, the red-masked turtle got up from the couch and cautiously walked up to his upset sibling.

"Bro; calm down, ya might hurt yaself…." Raph said; hoping that five yards was a safe enough distance.

Mikey turned around and shot him a nasty glare. "Shut up bitch; like _you _don't do that same damn thing when you're _just _smart enough to not use one of us as your punching bag." He hissed and went back to wailing on the punching bag.

Ouch, _that _stung.

Raph had to bite his lower beak to stop himself from snapping at him; there was no doubt that with enough reason Mikey would see him as the punching bag….

'_But I gotta do somethin'!' _Raph thought and glance at his raging brother; who mad at the Shredder and the Foot for hurting Chaplin and (most likely) torturing Karai, and mad at himself for being the reason behind it. Not just mad about it; but agonizing over the fact that Karai and Chaplin were hurt because of _him._

If it had been up to Mikey, he would have stormed out of the Lair the minute Chaplin was in Don's lab and hunted down each and every last Foot clan ninja until he got Karai: but Master Splinter talked him into waiting until Chaplin had regained consciousness, told them the situation and then they all plan things out.

The strain was _really _getting to Mikey. And none of them could do anything about. Well, as of yet nobody had actually tried anything. He wanted to help Mikey; he still loved him (And it must have been that 'true love' stuff because Mikey tried to kill him more than once and then attempted to rape him) and he didn't want Mikey to hurt like this.

'_What can I do? He's all angry and depressed at the same time…_' Raph wondered in his head, but an idea hit him at the word 'depressed'. '_Dat's it!_'

Raph exited the living room and hurriedly entered the bathroom where he rummaged through the medicine cabinet.

'_Hmmm…Lets see; ibuprofen, Aspirin, Nyquil, cough syrup, why the shell do we have Viagra? ! Damn Casey…Aha! Here it is!'_

Triumphantly Raph brought out a small white plastic bottle of pills. Anti-Depressants. Don and Leo sometimes used them whenever they got bouts of depression (it typically hit Leo more than Don.) but now they would be used on someone else.

Raph shook the bottle and two small pills came into his palms, two should be about right. '_Hmm, but I can't just tell Mikey to swallow these; I gotta trick him into eatin' them somehow, but how?_' He thought and propped his chin into his other palm, thinking.

After a few minutes Raph remembered that Mikey had a plastic water bottle that he drank out of when he got thirsty enough. Raph left the bathroom and put the pills on the kitchen counter and snuck over to Mikey; with the orange-masked turtle distracted he didn't see Raph take his water bottle.

Raph set the water bottle down after twisting the cap off then crushed the pills into a fine powder. He preceded the pour the powder into the bottle, twisting the cap back on and shaking the bottle.

He peered at the water – no, it looked murky, Mikey might notice. Since it was half empty, Raph filled the rest of it up with tap water, shook it again and snuck it back to its original spot without Mikey noticing.

The dark-green skinned terrapin returned to the couch and waited.

Fifteen minutes later, Mikey was gasping for air and holding on to the punching bag for support. Raph watched as his little brother grabbed his spiked water bottle and unscrewed the cap without looking at it. He was thankful that Mikey chugged down the entire thing; meaning he had taken both of the pills, now all he had to do was wait for the effects.

Mikey went back to beating the punching bag; in five minutes his movements became slower. In another five minutes his attacks were longer-drawn and in another couple of minutes he was breathing raggedly and again holding on to the punching bag for support.

"Shell….What's….wrong with me?" Mikey asked aloud and staggered over to the living room.

"You okay bro?" Raph asked and tried his best to look confused.

Mikey sat at the couch across from Raph and stared at him; his pupils were dilated and his eyes were swirling between shades of blue-gray. "I actually feel really good right now… weird… My head feels kinda fuzzy." Mikey slurred and started to sway a little.

Raph waited several more minutes for the Anti-Depressants to take full effect.

"Er… Mikey? What are ya doin' bro?" Raph asked with his voice a little high when Mikey suddenly got up and shakily walked towards him then sat down… On Raph's lap.

Mikey's eyes were unfocused and half-lidded and there was a lop-sided grin on his face as he gazed into Raph's own face.

"You wanna know something Raph?" Mikey asked him; his voice wasn't as low or gruff, he actually sounded like he used to, sending small tingles down Raph's shell.

"Er…What's that?" Raph asked; sweat starting to form on his ridge, he shifted nervously.

"It doe'nt matter what the Shredder says… " He slurred huskily, his hands taking hold of the amber-eyes turtles shoulders "….It wa'nt your fault …. Not your fault …. It was the beer's fault …You couldn't think right…..I do stupid things too when I can't think right..." (This moment would be a pretty good example...)

Mikey's face was suddenly dangerously close to Raph's. If Raph wasn't green he would probably be blushing right now.

"Mikey, you okay?" He asked the younger turtle, his heart starting to drum against his plastron.

Mikey hummed lightly and put his head in the crook of Raph's neck and nuzzled against him "I feel so happy Raphie…. The world is s'much lighter and brighter now …." He told him.

Raph was quiet; unsure of what to say or do.

Mikey raised his head away from Raph's neck and stared into his amber eyes again, the grin still spread on his features, but there was a certain emotion in his eyes…

"You know Raphie…" He whispered "I still love you….So much. I keep telling everyone I hate you, but I can never hate you…..'Cuz I love you…"

In spite of the suddenly fluttering going on in his insides, Raph slid away a little and reminded himself that this ws the pills talking. "Y-You don't know what you're sayin' Mikey, you're Leo's mate…." He reminded him.

Mikey frowned sadly "I want Leo to be happy… But I don't love him that way ...Donnie wants ta'be Leo's mate… They can have each other, right? Then we can _all _be happy 'cuz I want _you._" He admitted and cupped Raph's cheeks.

_Donnie _liked _Leo? _Geeze, Mikey's back a couple weeks and he already knows more about the family dynamic than him.

"Mikey, you're not thinkin' right, just-!" Raph started but was cut off.

"Shh!" Mikey shushed him before gently pressing his beak onto Raph's.

Raph's eyes widened as the younger turtle slid his tongue through his parted beak and started dominating his mouth.

Heart and instinct won over mind and reason; pent up passion was brought up when Raph returned the kiss full force; he wrapped his arms around Mikey's neck, pressing their plastrons together, making their hearts beat together in matched rhythm as their tongues danced together.

Caught up in their passion, they failed to notice that two others had walked in on them.

"Leo; before you boil over, let's think of a good reason behind this-!" Donnie tried to console his blue-masked brother, who was frozen on the spot, but his words were useless as raging flames as fierce as Hell fire appeared in Leo's usually lukewarm brown eyes.

"_RAPHAEL YOU SON OF A BITCH I'LL HAVE YOUR SHELL MOUNTED ON MY WALL!"_ Leo roared in anger and enmity, all ninja training and Bushido forgotten as he practically sailed in the air and tore Mikey and Raph apart, then brutually beat on his hothead brother.

* * *

><p><em>Ooooh, oooohhh: The effects of Anti-Depressants, people! In all honesty I have no idea if this kind of effect is valid, but I think it works pretty well!<em>

_What will happen next? What will Chaplin tell them, and will Angelo save Karai?_

_People; don't go hating on Raph, he was only trying to help! And contrary to popular belief; I do not hate him, in fact he and Mikey kind of share the title of my favorite turtle. If anything, as a kid I never liked Leo as much as the other turtles (Because, come on people; I was a kid. Back then I always got Leo and Don mixed up.) But that doesn't mean that now, as a teenager I do not like Leo; I just like Mikey and Raph better still._

_Read, review, get the next chapter and find out!_

_PS: An alternate name for this Chapter was 'Why you should leave Donnie to take care of other peoples problems'_


	31. Lighter and Brighter but then Darker

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

* * *

><p>"You know, most people would like it if two people fought over them; what's wrong with them? This wasn't fun to watch." Mikey said to Don, who had finally managed to drag Leo off of Raph.<p>

At the time Leo was at one couch being held back by Don (who considering restraining him) and glaring causticly at Raph on an opposite couch. Raph was bruised up and glaring right back at the blue-banded leader.

"Why can't we all get along….?" Mikey asked in an almost sing-song voice.

Donnie examined Mikey closely; his eyes were blue again and stretched wide in childish innocence….But they were distant and glazed over. He was smiling, his voice was higher and he didn't shove Don out of his personal space. Something was wrong. Even if he had shifted to his 'normal' personality he would still be nervous or scared if someone was standing too close.

Don shot a glance at Raph and narrowed his eyes "What _happened? _What's wrong with him?" He asked his dark-green skinned brother and pointed at Mikey.

Mikey pouted "What do you mean Donnie? Not'ing wrong with me…" He smiled again "I'm feel great!" As if to prove his point he did a no-handed cartwheel and landed on his feet with a loud 'Tah-Dah!' "See? Not'ing wrong….."

Leo looked at Mikey, the disbelief over seeing his mate with Raph still evident in his expresson "Mikey how could you? I thought we were…." He trailed off miserably.

Mikey looked guilty as he replied "I'm sorry Leo…..But I don't love you that way ….. I still love Raphie." He pointed at Raph.

"Even after what he did to you! ?" Leo harshly demanded, his hands balled into fists on his lap.

"Heart wants what heart wants." Mikey replied simply then yawned "M'tired, good night bro's." He headed to his room, but paused next to Raph. He kissed the top of his head, chirped "Love you!" then left.

"Don't believe 'im, Leo." Raph said to his older brother, but Don caught a certain edge in his voice but couldn't identify it; it sounded almost as if he didn't want to believe himself "He's er….. Under the influence…."

Don and Leo glared at him, but they looked curious.

"Wait, so not only does he smoke, but he does _drugs?_" Don asked with a raised eye ridge.

"Not exact-He _smokes?_" Raph cut his response off with another question.

"Not important!" Don excused and crossed his arms "Raph, what was he _on?_" Then he noticed Raph shifting around nervously and realized something. "What the shell did you do now?" He demanded.

He hit home with that; Raph definitely had something to do with this.

"Well; Mikey was bein' all emo about the Chaplin and Karai thing. He was beating on the punchin' bag and exhaustin' himself. He was gonna hurt himself! I had ta do somethin'! So I thought if I gave him somethin' he wouldn't hurt himself." Raph told them cryptically but didn't answer completely.

"Raph," Leo harshly demanded and slammed his fist against the arm-rest of the couch "what did you give him?"

"I just spiked his water…..with Anti-Depressants…." Raph told them finally.

Silence.

"Oh my _God!_" Don muttered, breaking the silence "Raph how could you be so stupid?"

"Stupid!" Raph repeated angrily, offended "I was only tryin' to stop 'im from hurtin' himself and it worked! Hell, he seemed way happier den before!"

"He'll never get better that way!" Don argued "Pills can't solve our problems forever! Pills are _temporary, _Raph, its not a cure! He _just _got off withdrawal; we don't need him on another substance! His mind is _already _unstable!"

"He'll be back to normal soon enough; what's bad about this? He looked happy!" Raph argued back, he rose from the couch and crossed his arms.

"Because he doesn't trust us! He didn't eat at all when he realized I was spiking his food with sedative; do you realize how _paranoid _he'll get if he figures out you spiked his water?"

Raph was taken aback; he hadn't thought of it that way. The red-masked turtle turned his head and glared at the floor, not sure how to reply to that.

"Don?" Leo asked, speaking up for the first time. His chin was propped on the back of his hand "Do you think Mikey meant what he said?"

Don didn't want to hurt Leo but he wanted to be honest "Honestly Leo, I have no idea. I think he might be thinking the same way he did before all this happened; back when he loved Raph."

Leo sighed, got up and left to his room. He looked serious and unnerved on the outside, but Don knew that on the inside Leo was conflicted.

Don turned to Raph again, he had a distant look in his eyes, in fact he looked a little….. Disappointed.

"What did happen? Mikey was all over you." Don asked.

Raph sighed "What does it matta'? Da fact is dat Mikey can't eva' feel that way, it was da pills talkin'" he replied flatly and left; his feet were dragging.

The purple-masked genius couldn't help but feel sorry for Raph; he _was _only trying to help Mikey. Ever since the truth was revealed everyone had been treating him like the bad guy. It's not like Raph intentionally hurt Mikey that way over a year ago. And Raph felt horrible for what he did, he even tried to redeem himself by fighting the Shredder; it's not like he wasn't trying to make things right again.

Sighing, Don turned off the living room lights and departed to his own room. Tomorrow Chaplin would hopefully wake up and the effects of the Anti-Depressants would wear off and Mikey would remember nothing.

With a heavy heart, Don lay on his bed, turned to his side and fell asleep.

* * *

><p>Angelo awoke, yawned and arose to a sitting-up position on the bed. He rubbed his eyes and surveyed his surroundings: he was lying in his bed and he in his room.<p>

Strange, he didn't remember falling asleep last night.

Feeling oddly giddy, the sea-green terrapin pushed the blankets off of him and walked out of his room. He glanced at the clock. One o'clock in the afternoon? Damn, he'd overslept.

Angelo walked into the kitchen, feeling so light, almost floating on his feet even. His mate Leo was sitting at the table eating a sandwich and his shell was facing him. A heavy emotion settled at the bottom of his chest when he saw the missing chunk of Leo's carapace; he knew it was because of his adoptive sister that Leo had that.

"Yo Leo." Angelo said before coming up behind his oblivious mate and wrapping his arms around him. Leo stiffened and turned to him, surprise and some other emotion written across his face.

"H-hey Mikey." Leo greeted; Angelo frowned, Leo _never _stuttered. Something was up.

Angelo cupped his mates head and kissed his cheek; Leo flinched. "What's wrong?" he asked concerned.

"Do you remember last night?" Leo asked him. Angelo studied Leo expression closely; Leo's expression was always guarded so it was rather difficult but his body language expressed that he was nervous. But about what?

"Hmmm…" Angelo thought for a moment "Not really; I was beating on the punching bag one minute, then I started to feel weird…Then things just kinda faded, I think I went to the couch though. That's it. What did happen?"

He was a lot of things; but stupid was not one of those. Something definitely happened, something he didn't remember. Did he have another episode?

"You passed out on the couch," his mate told him "You were exhausted; we were worried you strained yourself."

It was obviously an excuse but Angelo shrugged it off.

"Whatever man." He said and flexed just to make sure he wasn't sore or anything. Nope. "Hey can I borrow these?" he asked and grabbed onto the handles of Leo's katanna's

"Sure, what for?" Leo asked him curiously.

"Just watch." Angelo told him and took the swords out. He gathered a few things around the kitchen; an apple, a grapefruit and an orange. Grinning, Angelo threw the three fruits into the air.

_Slash, Slash, Slit, Slash! _

Peels fell to the floor, but fruit slices landed gracefully onto the table. Leo let out an impressed whistle. "Impressive." He said with a grin of his own. Angelo grinned wider and sat down at the table and ate the fruit slices.

"Well _someone's _a little less emo today." A new voice said. Raph entered the kitchen.

Angelo was about to retort, but stopped himself when he noticed Leo give Raph a nasty glare. Leo seemed to be silently warning Raph to stay away; he was being protective, over what? Over Angelo? Wasn't the overprotective thing Donnie's bit? Sure, Leo was Angelo's mate but he had a healthy respect that Angelo could protect and fight for himself.

"I am not emo." Angelo told Raph with a pout, huh he hadn't pouted in forever; in the Foot he was trained to expect pain when he did something like that, but he didn't feel the burning sensation he always felt when he slipped up old personality traits like that.

In fact: Raph seemed a little less afraid of him, and Angelo surprisingly didn't mind, odd because Angelo learned to take pleasure in others fear of him.

"So you're _not _emo, just moody?" Raph teased with crossed arms; strange, Angelo didn't feel fear with Raph's presence anymore either. What was going on?

In a comical way Angelo started mumbling to himself out loud "You could have killed him Angelo, but _no _you have to do the 'right thing' and save him instead." Then gnashed his teeth together in a grin to surpress his chuckles. Leo and Raph rolled their eyes but chuckled as well.

He felt great today! Whatever had happened last night, it couldn't have been bad.

* * *

><p>"Hey? You okay?" Angelo asked Chaplin as he started to come to; just to make sure, he waved his three-fingered hand over the red-heads face.<p>

"Y'know I hate that…." Chaplin groaned.

"Yup; you're definitely okay." Angelo said and assisted his friend in sitting up. "Donnie said you lost a lot of blood. Not only that, but your elbow was fractured, the bones in your right hand were shattered, your shoulder blade was cracked and you were covered in a lot of deep cuts, you'll have to wear stitches for a while." He explained.

"Karai…." Chaplin whispered, as if he didn't just hear about his own condition.

A cold and heavy emotion grew in Angelo's throat and slid to the bottom of his stomach, but not without leaving a bad taste in his mouth. Angelo took out a chair and planted himself next to the bed. "What happened?" He asked seriously.

"A-after you left…" Chaplin began "Hun came to the Shredder…"

Hun! The walking land-mass survived! He should have made sure he died…..

"He told him you had betrayed him; you chose sides with your family, you saved Raphael. However, the Shredder did not tell Karai this; he had some of his Foot ninja follow her. They ease-dropped on us while you and your brothers were gone…."

"And?"

"They heard our conversation and put two-and-two together. The Shredder realized that Karai had betrayed him. He called us up….. And had us cornered; She fought valiantly, but there were too m-many of them….S-She…" Chaplin's voice started to crack, his brown eyes started to tear up.

"She what?" Angelo demanded.

"She sacrificed herself….For me, she could have gotten away; but she was protecting me! I got away but she…. I'm so weak…I should have protected her…!" Chaplin burst into tears.

Angelo quickly patted his red-headed friend on the back and rubbed comforting circles "Chaplin, is Karai…. Dead?" his voice was soft, an onslaught of grief about to crash down if he heard the worst.

"No! She was captured….! It's way worse Angelo…! Way, way worse!" Chaplin cried out, hysterics edging closer and closer.

"Chaplin, I want you to listen to me." Angelo commanded sternly, and made the red-head look at him "_This _was not your fault; you couldn't have seen this coming. You honor Karai and her sacrifice by escaping; otherwise you could not have told me this."

Chaplin rolled onto his stomach and pressed his face against the pillow to muffle out his cries, a few minutes later he turned his head to Angelo; his eyes pink and puffy from tears.

"What happens now, Angelo?" He asked; the sea-green terrapins heart sank, Chaplin reminded him of a vulnerable child, one that needed comfort and closure.

Angelo got up and took out his _Jumonji-Yari, _his eyes narrowed and became fully gray and a certain look filled his expression; the kind of look you see on a madman before he mass-vandalizes something.

"I'm going over to Foot headquarters to save my sister, and kill every mother fucker who _dares _get in my way!"

You'd be stupid not to be afraid.

* * *

><p><em>I'm a little disapointed in this chapter but nyeh.<em>

_You know the drill by now; Read, review, get the next chapter._


	32. One goal in mind

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

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><p>"Angelo, wait!" Chaplin called and stumbled weakly into the room before the turtles, Master Splinter, Leatherhead, Casey and April were about to leave. Angel was assisting Chaplin.<p>

"Take it easy!" Angel urged, Chaplin's arm was around her shoulders and he was leaning against her for support.

"What is it?" Angelo asked; what was so important Chaplin had to get out of bed?

"Before you go, there was something Karai was going to give you." Chaplin told him. Angelo raised an eye ridge.

"And what would that be?" Leo asked for him.

"It's…" Chaplin looked around and seemed to be thinking intently before answering. He pointed at one of the couches "I stuck it under there."

Angelo dived to the couch and thrust a arm under it. His hand wandered around the floor, touching mostly dust, crumbs and random debris before he felt something more solid. He wrapped his hand around it and gingerly pulled it out.

Whatever it was, it was wrapped in black-dyed silk and tied around with strips of orange-dyed silk. Angelo's heart panged at the sight of both his mask colors.

"Open it." Chaplin urged and gave him a gracious smile "You'll like it."

Unhesitant, Angelo untied the orange silk and unfolded the black silk.

With a half-frown, he pulled the items out.

It was a pair of _nunchaku._

They were sleek and black; with the design of an orange dragon curling around the handles.

"Nunchucks?" He said to Chaplin with a confused look.

"Not just any nunchucks," Chaplin gave him a small smile as he said that "those were reinforced from your old pair; the wood was used as a base, and it has the same chain. This pair is thinner, but it moves faster in the air and can add more force."

A grin broke out on Angelo's face when he heard that; these weren't just nunchucks, they were _his _nunchucks. He glanced down at the pair of black-wrapped _chigiriki_ hanging on his belt and removed them. He placed those Foot weapons on the table and put his nunchucks where they belonged.

"Thanks; it's been a while, but I know I can use them again." Angelo said.

"Good for you Mikey." Leo said and patted his mates shoulder.

"Not for nothin' but why did ya stop usin' nunchucks in the first place?" Raph asked. Don shot him a desperate glance, but too late.

Angelo's looked to the ground and tightened his fists. "The Foot elite broke them," he voice was tight with anger "I refused to use a different pair of nunchucks; Master Splinter gave them to me. That's why Shredder gave me the _chigiriki _instead; they weren't too different from nunchucks after all." He replied honestly.

Master Splinter shot his youngest son an all-knowing look with pride in his eyes. "Let us go my sons; with every passing second, Miss Oroku's life becomes more and more in jeopardy."

Angelo nodded at Chaplin and Angel before sprinting out of the Lair, the rest followed up closely behind.

* * *

><p>"Follow me." Angelo hissed to Don as they slinked down one of the dark hallway of the Oroku manor.<p>

"Where are we going?" Don whispered back.

"The dojo; the place is more dungeon than dojo, Karai might be held there." Angelo replied, his hand twitching towards his nunchucks. "There are chains on the walls, the room is soundproof and they have…instruments of torture in there."

Don could hear a razored edge of terror in Angelo's voice: he's experienced this all first hand, he knew just how bad it all was.

Angelo stopped them when they came to a door less opening into a room; they peered inside and saw Hun was sharpening a knife and heading it. The room was dark.

"I smell anxiety; the Foot goons are hiding in there." Angelo told Donnie "Get ready, we're going in." The orange-masked turtle gripped the handles of his nunchucks.

Don saw a killer look in his little brothers eyes; it was almost scary how focused he was; he had one goal in mind; save Karai.

"Three…" Don started the countdown, he held onto his Bo staff.

"Two…" Angelo continued.

"One!" The shouted in unison and jumped in.

* * *

><p>Meanwhile, Leo, Raph and Master Splinter were scouring the basement of the Oroku Manor; Casey, April and Leatherhead were searching the middle floors of the Manor.<p>

"Man, if a couple months ago ya told me we were gonna save Karai; I would have laughed in ya face." Raph grumbled, Leo elbowed him in the plastron – a little harder than he was supposed to, but that was expected; Leo was still pretty peeved off at him for the other night.

"Be silent Raphael." Master Splinter whispered "I sense a presence nearby."

Raph suddenly froze; panic gripped him when he surveyed his surroundings. Fear mixed in with that panic; he knew this place, they held him here while he was captured.

The 'endurance' training took place right where they were standing…

* * *

><p><em>Raph gritted his teeth as the whips constantly bit into his skin; striking, withdrawing and then striking again. His skin burned, these whips weren't meant to break skin, just cause pain.<em>

_The Foot elite standing who were whipping him said that they were testing his endurance; it was almost like a game to them, seeing how much they would whip him before he cried out in pain._

_But he wouldn't, his pride wouldn't allow him._

_One of the Foot elite poured ice-cold water on him; torture, he was cold blooded and in pain, but he still wouldn't cry out._

_He'd seen the whip scars on Mikey's body; had he gone through this? How long had he lasted before he cried out?_

* * *

><p>"Raphael!" The sound of Leo's voice drew Raph out of his terrible memories; he came to, Master Splinter and Leo were fighting the four Foot elite.<p>

Rage washed over him like a dark, hot tide; these Foot elite who had tortured him; he was weak and tied down then, but now he could fight back.

"Payback time." Raph growled and took out his sai's.

Revenge was best served with a sai to the throat, that one of the Foot elite learned the hard way.

* * *

><p>"Where the <em>fuck <em>is my sister! ?" Angelo demanded.

Don flinched when he heard the sickening sound of his nunchucks colliding with Hun's head. The bodies of Foot ninja both dead and unconscious, surrounded them.

Angelo had Hun at his mercy; one of Hun's arms was shackled to the wall, a ball-and-chain was wrapped around both of his legs and Angelo his one of his nunchucks secured around Hun's other wrist.

Hun wasn't talking – and now Angelo was getting scary.

"Don't wanna talk huh?" Angelo voice suddenly dropped to a scary low tone, a twisted grin filled his face and his eyes turned completely gray.

There was a sickening _crunch _and a horrible scream – no, not a shout or whoop that's you'd expect from a male set of vocal cords like Hun's, it was a high-pitched, horrible scream that you'd expect to hear from a little girl getting her limbs torn off. Angelo had just broken Hun's arm.

"So you going to tell me where my sister is, or is your _neck _gonna be next?" Angelo's voice was borderline psychotic; almost sounding amused. Don found himself slowly backing away.

Hun finally talked; but only when Angelo actually secured his nunchucks around his neck and started to twist.

* * *

><p><strong><em>Pain everywhere, pain. <em>**

**_Darkness, blood and even more agony; inside and out._**

**_How long had she been there?_**

**_Hanging on this wall, stripped of all of her honor, her life slowly and agonizingly dripping out of her like her blood. _**

**_Was Chaplin okay? She hoped he was, maybe Angelo and his brothers had found him…She did tell him to go to their lair, right?_**

**_Thinking too much hurt her head, but she didn't care._**

**_Her normally light skin was discolored with dark bruised, bright electrical burn scars, dirt stains and blood smears. Her clothes were torn and she couldn't see with one of her eyes, well as far as she could tell in a dark place like this._**

**_Suddenly, her dark Hell was pierced by light; the door was open. Had her tormentors returned for another round?_**

**_She closed her eyes and tried to drift off further – no more, please no more. Killing her would be much better than forcing her to live this kind of torture. Everything hurt, even the light that she had once viewed as hope._**

**_"Karai? Oh my god…" The voice was familiar, really familiar, but it was hushed and becoming rough with emotion._**

**_"I'll get you out of here…Don't worry." The voice was talking again, she heard what they were saying but their words became lost in her disoriented mind. She did recognize that their tone was gentle, soothing._**

**_She felt her wrists shift around as the shackles around them were messed with, the same with the ball-and-chain shackled on her legs. _**

**_The grip on her wrists was gone; she was sure she was going to fall, but someone cushioned her fall, she fell onto them and they wrapped her arms around her._**

**_A hug? Comfort…Warmth…Love even? _**

**_"I got her Donnie, let's go; she needs medical attention!"_**

**_How bad was she? _**

**_She couldn't think of it anymore; she buried herself into the warmth of whoever was holding her. They held her so tenderly, like they cared. Maybe they did._**

**_But who did care about her, who would? She, a ninja without honor might as well be dead. Why can't she be dead?_**

**_As soon as she was in the light, she was forced into her world of darkness._**

**_Before the darkness claimed her consciousness, she heard someone ever so gently say something comforting to her, something she would remember clearly, the only thing she would remember clearly of that night._**

**_"I won't let them get you again, Karai. I love you."_**

* * *

><p><em>Karai is rescued! What next? Ohhooo, I got a few things planned.<em>

_Note: When Angelo said he loved Karai, he meant it in a platonic way! Not romance kind!_

_The full extent of Karai's torture will be explained in the next chapter._

_The story ends in a couple chapters. Sneak preview, let's just say Leo does something stupid. Oh yeah, Chaplin and Angelo and the guys try a hand at helping Karai heal._


	33. I thought he was safe!

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

* * *

><p>"Raph, what are you doing on my computer?" Don demanded when he came into his lab and found Raph hunched over his computer desk.<p>

"Reading your logs." Raph answered simply and skimmed the first few entries "Geeze, I'm glad that I wasn't here during his withdrawal: I can't believe he got you and Leo confused with Karai and Chaplin! Den again, if ya close one eye and squint with the otha'-"

"You're not supposed to look at those! They're private!" Don cut his off and tried to push away the desk chain Raph was sitting in, but his red-masked brother held on to one of the rails of the metallic computer desk.

"Don, don't get all possessive; I already knew ya liked Leo." Raph said with a roll of his eyes. Donnie froze.

"H-how! Was it obvious?" He asked self-consciously. Yeah, _really _good thing he's green, or he'd be the color of a tomato right now.

"Believe it or not; Mikey told me." Raph replied, seeing the surprise on Don's face, he added "He was on 'happy pills'."

Don shrugged and decided to change the subject "Any reason you're reading those? How did you even know about them? I didn't tell anyone."

"I saw ya writing in these every night so I decided to check it out." Raph told him and glanced at the screen "Though I can't help but feel like you're treatin' Mikey like a science experiment eitha'"

Don felt anger spike into his blood, but he ignored it, it was petty anger. "I expected that much." Don said simply and shrugged "But it does offer closure; I know Mikey's recovering."

"Speakin' of recovery, how's Karai?" Raph asked.

Silence.

It had been over two weeks since they rescued Karai, she had been temporarily living with them since. The damage of her torture had been gruesome; not only had she been put through the same kind of torture the Government puts a terrorist through to get information, but she had also been put through many different tortures the Shredder had learned about all throughout history. Not only tortured; but _raped _as well, and been electrocuted in her err…. 'girly place'. And this was only what Don and Leatherhead knew from examining her; they knew that there were some things Karai had endured that couldn't be physically revealed.

As a trained ninja; Karai tried her best to not appear vulnerable or mentally shattered around them, but in reality she was. She had nightmares, horrible ones; ones that even Mikey couldn't help her with. One night it got to the point to where they had to restrain her just to keep her from hurting herself (and them) while she was asleep.

Mikey practically never left her side; while she was in the infirmary he slept with her in her cot, and now that she had recently moved into his room with him because she had 'imprinted him as a comfort source' as Leatherhead had said. In fact, Mikey and Chaplin were the only ones she felt safe around, but mostly it was Mikey.

The strain was hitting him hard though; he pretty much never slept since he put it upon himself to always be there when Karai had nightmares, just like she had for him back when he had unconscious episodes, so he was woken up constantly throughout the night. And he never strayed far from her side; he never let any of his brothers get too close to her, with the exception of Donnie or Leatherhead because they kept track of her condition.

Never before had they thought that Mikey would be playing the role of 'over-protective big brother' but that's how he was acting. Because Karai had done the same for him and to each other, they were brother and sister. But Mikey was physically and mentally exhausted, they could all tell. Alone, this was too much for him to bear.

"She's….Coping." Don offered even though it wasn't too true; she acted like she was coping, like she could put this behind her easily; but it wasn't the case. They knew this was first-hand experience with Leo (Because, let's face it; Karai and Leo are a lot alike).

"Mikey can't keep doin' what he does." Raph said, straight to the point "He'll collapse from exhaustion soona' or lata'. Shell, he drinks more coffee that _you _now_, _Donnie-boy."

"Mikey feels responsible for Karai." Don told him and ignored the coffee remark "To him, Karai is like a sister. He feels like it's his fault that Karai went through what she did; he thinks that if Karai hadn't rescued him that day none of this would have happened. But I agree with you Raph; this is getting to him more than he lets on."

Silence.

"So uh….Donnie," Raph said with a raised ridge "what was the KFC joke anyways?"

* * *

><p>"Mikey, can I talk to you outside the lair?" Leonardo asked his mate with the all serious look of 'even-if-you-say-no-I'll-take-it-as-a-yes-anyways', his arms were crossed and he looked more serious than ever (how serious does this guy get?)<p>

Angelo glanced at Karai, who was asleep on his plastron. They were both sitting on the couch and Karai had fallen asleep, he was actually half-asleep before Leo came over here. The bastard woke him up.

"But Karai-" Angelo protested, only for Leo to take firm hold of his un-tattooed shoulder.

Leo gave him a strained look. "Karai will still be here if you leave her for a few minutes." He almost seemed angry.

"Fine, fine." Angelo mumbled and slowly got up so he wouldn't disturb his sleeping adoptive-sibling; he removed her from his plastron and gently set her to lie down on the couch.

Leo walked towards the exit of the Lair and motioned for him to follow, Angelo shot one last glance at Karai before he followed.

They exited the Lair and into the sewers, only to walk a few yards down the passage before Leo abruptly stopped.

"So, what did you want to talk about?" Angelo asked with his arms crossed, Leo's shell facing him.

Without warning, Leo _lunged _at him. Angelo let out a surprised yelp as he was forced against the sewer wall.

He opened his mouth to say something but Leo silenced him with a kiss. Naturally, Angelo returned it. A growl tore from the back of Leo's throat and he pressed the younger turtle harder against the wall.

Panting heavily, Leo pulled away from him for oxygen. Moments later he latched his mouth onto the others neck.

A small churr escaped Angelo. In most other cases he would find experiances like this with his mate pleasurable… But for some reason he was panicking. Not just because he was pinned, but because something about Leo was different….Almost as if the blue-masked leader was being possessive, or trying to show Angelo himself he was his mate.

"L-Leo…" Angelo whined and attempted to push Leo away with one arm. Firmly, Leo pulled away for a moment and took hold of both the younger turtles wrists and pinned his arms above his head.

Leo gave him a smile thinking the other was whining about being teased, then re-attached his mouth the sea-green throat.

Panic set in further; his heart was beating at a dangerously fast rate and his mind was becoming numb. Not a good sign, he knew that he either stopped this soon or he would have a panic attack.

"Leo..." He whispered before letting out another moan from his traitorous body's reaction "St-Stop it... Not in the mood." He moved his wrists to try to free them from Leo's grasp, but the grip only tightened.

But Leo didn't seem to see the others panic. Leo used his one free hand to explore and caress Angelo's scarred body. "I'll put you in the mood…" Leo purred against his neck and pulled him into another kiss.

_Touching… Pinned…_

Angelo's panic was sent into over-drive when he felt Leo's hand all over his body; cold, numbing fear formed and spread where Leo touched. He was sent into a flurry of flashbacks. Mainly the 'incident' from over a year ago. His body become paralyzed, his mind numb to all thoughts except for the panic-driven ones that did not respond to reason or common sense.

Why wouldn't Leo let him go? Was he going to hurt him too?

All training in the Foot was suddenly forgotten; he found that he _couldn't _break free from Leo's grip, he _couldn't _fight back. He was weak against an older brother just like the year before.

His heart and mind started to shatter under the panic.

'_I thought…Leo was safe…_' He wailed in his head, tears gathering at the corners of his eyes '_Not safe…He'll hurt me too… Who is safe…Who can help me?_'

Before his mind completely blanked out, before it was all over: he escaped into the darkness. It was even better than sleep, because when you sleep you have to wake up. Everything would finally go away. But in his last clear logic-ridden thought he remembered someone he could always trust, someone who could help him. When Leo finally pulled away from the kiss, Angelo screamed.

"_**DONNIE!**_"

* * *

><p><em>For those of you wondering why Angelo reacted like that; He has a death-fear of being pinned and of physical contact. In this case it was both, along with being ravaged. Naturally, being a rape-victim he panicked. Full-scale 'kill-me-now-I'd-rather-be-dead-that-be-here' kind of panic. Panick fueled a sort of depression because he veiwed Leo as 'safe', but now Leo was being the cause of his panic and fear. <em>

_In the next Chapter we will find that Angelo's has finally been pushed over the edge._

_If you ask nicely, I will tell you the KFC joke!_


	34. In which mediation is the answer again

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

* * *

><p>"Guys…I'm really stumped here; physically nothing seems to be wrong. But mentally…I have no idea." Don said sadly and withdrew from the cot where the youngest turtle lay. Leo was on one side of the cot, clutching one of Mikey's hands in both of his own. Raph was leaning against a nearby wall, watching. Chaplin, who was in better physical condition now, was helping Don examine Mikey.<p>

Half an hour ago Don heard the sound of Mikey calling for help. Instinctively he had headed to the source; Raph heard it also and followed. They then came to the outside of the lair to find Leo pinning Mikey to the sewer wall. Don for the moment couldn't rationalize it and only thought that Mikey needed help; he attacked Leo.

Raph would have joined in; but he noticed that Mikey seemed to have no control of his legs and was about to fall face-first onto the watery ground. He would have, if Raph hadn't caught him in time. Then Raphael noticed something was wrong, something was really, really wrong.

Mikey wasn't responsive; he wouldn't move, wouldn't speak, wouldn't…. do anything besides breathe or blink really.

Don at first thought it was shock or something; but his blood pressure was normal.

So he tried tests to see if Mikey would react.

Waving hands in front of his face – No reaction.

Shining light into his eyes – No reaction.

Clapping loudly and suddenly in front of him – No reaction.

Pressing ice onto his skin – No reaction.

Touching scars – No reaction. And Don was sure that one would work.

Don wasn't particularly proud of this test, but he was desperate; he grabbed Mikey's tail to see if he would react. And wouldn't you know it – No reaction.

Don had no answers, neither did Chaplin.

"Dis is all you're fault, Fearless." Raph growled and pouted an accusing finger at Leo; who admitted to having 'cornered' the sea-green turtle. "Ya molested 'im and now he's brain-dead… Thanks to you!"

"Don't you think I know that?" Leo snapped and gnashed his teeth together in a mix of frustration and self-hatred.

"Why'd ya do it Leo? Ya knew his mind was already on da edge, and den ya gotta up and push it furtha'! Were you, Leonardo, actually gettin' jealous because of dat one night with the pills?" Raph continued to rave on, Leo was quiet.

"Both of you stop! This isn't helping!" Don's lashed; silencing both his older brothers.

"What can help us Don?" Raph rudely retorted "Not ta be a pessimist; but wit' every otha' problem Mikey has dat we're just lucky enough ta get past, ten more come up!"

"Well what can we do about it?" Don growled back and pointed an angry finger at Raph "And besides, why are you complaining? _This is all your damn fault! _If you weren't so prideful and tried to prove yourself to Casey, _none of this would have happened! _If you really do love Mikey, then how come _you _never contribute when we try to help him?"

"Oh I don't know Donnie-boy," Raph snorted sarcastically "Maybe it's because if I got so much as a few feet close to him, you'd go all 'body-guard'. Or maybe because if I somehow get passed you, he tries to _kill _me or has an episode. I _know _the minute he see's my mug he rememba's everything from _dat_ day. But dis isn't about me Don, dis time _Leo _was the schmuck who loused up with Mikey!"

Don was about to take out his Bo staff, and Raph the same with his sai's. But another person came into the room in the nick of time.

"My sons! Cease your fighting at once; now is not a time to band together and not be estranged." Their aged rat Master said as he walked into the room, Raphael and Donatello immediately let go of their aggression. For now at least.

"Master Splinter….It's Mikey…We don't know what's wrong…" Leo told him.

"Allow me to shed some light." The gray rat said and placed a paw on Michaelangelo's forehead; the unresponsive turtle only blinked, but that was something his body had to do.

The turtles were silent, waiting for their father to explain things to them.

"Your brothers mind is shattered; as of late it was starting to slowly repair. However, shattered things are often the more prone to be broken. Michaelangelo had very little trust in us; but he believes that Leonardo had betrayed him and broke that trust."

Leonardo flinched.

"He fears and resents the world. In his time of distress, he had been 'pushed over the edge' and in a last resort to protect himself he did the only thing he found himself able to do to ensure he would no longer have to face the world."

"And what was that, Father?" Donatello asked him softly.

"He withdrew into his mind. His spirit and mind are now separated from his body. He is spirit is lost in his shattered mind."

"So what ya sayin' is," Raph said and paused to glance at Mikey "he's in his _head?_"

"Comatose." Don mumbled, somewhat to himself.

"His spirit is lost….. Does that mean we can find him sensei?" Leo asked hopefully; he was eager to make things right again, well as 'right' as things got for four sewer-dwelling mutant ninja turtles with a mutated rat master.

"It will be difficult, but it is possible." Master Splinter told them and swept his paw comfortingly across Mikey's forehead.

"How?" Raph asked, though he already had a pretty good idea.

"This is a matter of spirit and mind; this is a time for Meditation. Enter your brothers mind and find him, bring him back to us."

* * *

><p><em>Yeah, so they're going into Mikey's mind via Meditation; they might even find the 'real' Mikey.<em>

_Read, review, get the next chapter and see what happens!_


	35. The inner sanctum of Michaelangelo

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

* * *

><p>The three brothers and Master Splinter were all seating in a circle, a single white candle in front of each of them. In the middle of their circle lay Mikey, still unresponsive.<p>

Their eyes were closed, their breathing was slow and even, their minds were becoming more focused and aligned. Their bodies were relaxed. And their spirits were beginning to enter to Astral plain.

Together they left the Astral plain and entered a new domain – The mind of Michaelangelo Homato.

* * *

><p><em>"What the Shell?" Raph said aloud when they flashed into Mikey's inner sanctum on his mind.<em>

_It was not as they expected – it was landscape, but it appeared to be quite literally in pieces: like there had been some kind of earthquake that tore the land into scattered puzzle pieces separated by cracks._

_The 'puzzle piece' they currently were standing on appeared to be a sort of dojo: ones with paper-screen sliding doors, Kanji symbols in the walls and the Foot emblem printed on an overhead banner. The dojo had several training items; including punching bags, weapons, training dummies and balance beams ect. _

_"Let's get a move on, Raph" Leo said "We're here to find Mikey, not to go sight-seeing."_

_Raph grumbled as Master Splinter led the way to the next 'puzzle-piece', they hopped the black abyss that separated each of the puzzle-pieces._

_This one appeared to be a bedroom: it wasn't very furnished with only a bed, a hope chest, a small closet and a bookshelf. The walls and floor of the room were white, but the furniture was all black which contrasted against the pale background._

_"Is dis really Mikey's head?" Raph asked as he walked to the bookshelf and examined the books "Dese are Manga and Graphic novels, not comic books."_

_"You read the logs," Don told him with a shrug and looked around the room; he suddenly fished under one of the dark pillows and pulled something out "you know he into that Anime crap now. And I'm positive this is Mikey's head, look." He pointed at the item in his hand "This is a sketchpad."_

_"What logs?" Leo asked with a raised ridge but received no answer as Don plopped himself onto the bed and started flipping through the sketchpad._

_"That's weird – this isn't Mikey's drawing style." Don said with a frown. Raph, Leo and Master Splinter came up to Don as he showed them the picture._

_It was a pencil-shaded sketch of a staff with a strip of paper folding off of it into a cobra._

_"Whata'ya mean Don?" Raph asked "It looks like he drew it."_

_"Yeah, but this one has no color." Don said "When Mikey draws he never puts this much detail into the shadows, and he always shades with colors."_

_"I'm not surprised." A new voice said, making them all almost jump. "Mikey didn't draw it, I did."_

_They turned and saw Mikey standing near the edge of the puzzle-piece: his eyes were narrow and slate-gray, the bottom lid of his eye was bright red. He was wearing a Foot uniform and black mask and even had the metal wrist bands on._

_"Mikey!" Leo, Don and Raph said in unison. Master Splinter was silent._

_The other turtle rolled his eyes "If you came here to look for your brother; you should probably try the other side of this mind."_

_"You're standing…Right in front of us." Raph said to him, confused._

_"Man, you guys don't get it do you?" The gray-eyed other scoffed and crossed his arms "I'm __**Angelo. **__Remember the whole Multiple-Personality thing? Your 'Mikey' is on the other side of this mental sanctum, on his side of his personality."_

_"Wait…You didn't kill him or anything? But aren't you…?" Don trailed off._

_"Evil? Well yeah, I am; I was designed that way." Angelo said with a shrug "But I was a personality created to __**protect **__his real personality, remember?"_

_"If you will," Master Splinter asked "would you take us to Michaelangelo?"_

_Angelo shrugged "Ah hell, why not? I mean, he's always dormant, someone might as well wake his ass up."_

_"Dormant?" Leo asked._

_"Hm, how do I explain this to your stupid ass?" Angelo told him and thought "Okay; his spirit was wounded by him-" he pointed at Raph "then wounded even more by the Shredder; hence, I was created. But his personality had to lay dormant. The injuries have neither healed nor scarred, slowly the wounds just fester, and he fades while I grow stronger. He used to come out of 'sleep' anytime we were around Karai or Chaplin, but lately he has been so weak it's hard for him to regain control, especially with the 'personality shifts'. It really was a good thing you put him off those pills by the way; those things 'controlled' the personality shifts by slowly destroying one of us, which turned out to be him."_

_They stared at him dumb folded._

_"But what about those times Mikey comes out in personality shifts?" Donnie asked._

_"It's sort of complicated." Angelo said but explained anyways "We're not individual people; we are two alternate personalities of the same person. It's just my personality traits are more dominant; enough so I've manifested to almost be considered a 'person'. It's hard to explain, alright so I won't go any further than that."_

_Angelo walked up and snatched the sketchpad from Don's hand "Oh and this is __**my **__side of the mind, so if you touch my stuff again I'll lob your god damn head off. __**Mikey **__may love you all and all that shit; but I'm his dark side, you fuckers can die for all I care."_

_Don took a fearful step back._

_Angelo started walking to another puzzle piece "Follow me; I'll take you to Mikey's side of the mind."_

_He hopped to the next puzzle piece; the Homato family looked at each other uncertainly before they followed._

* * *

><p><em>"Is this Mikey's side?" Don asked when Angelo finally stopped on a certain puzzle piece. This one was a bare field with colorless grass.<em>

_"No, look." Angelo told him and pointed at the puzzle piece which was actually pretty close; the crack that separated it and the piece they stood on was remarkably much thinner; they could walk over it. That puzzle piece was also a field; but a green one dotted by the occasional flower. "A couple landscapes ahead you'll find place that looks like your old lair; you'll find him there. Just know that you won't like what you see." Angelo turned to leave._

_"Aren't you coming with us?" Leo called back as Angelo neared the edge away from them._

_"No Leonardo." He said, his voice was still monotone "Once you bring Mikey out, I will be forced to go dormant, I'm disconnected from the body."_

_"So we're not gonna see you no more?" Raph asked, relieved._

_Angelo shot him a cold, hate-filled glare "Just remember this," he hissed out slowly, his slate-colored eyes narrowed "I might go dormant; but I'll __**always **__still be around. I can be weakened but not destroyed, I'm a permanent side to Mikey now, the dark side; I'll linger in the dark corners like the shadows. You haven't seen the last of me; I'll come out again when times call for it." And he leapt away, disappearing in his colorless side of the mind._

_"Is what he said true father?" Leo asked; would 'Angelo' truly never leave, would Mikey never be the same?_

_"I am afraid so, my son." The aged rat replied sadly "What has happened to your brother will always affect him; that side of him is enough truth, the events of the past year he will always remember." Seeing the anguish on his three sons faces, he added "But with time and the love of his family, his pain will be lessoned greatly."_

_Master Splinter stepped over the crack and his sons followed._

_The grass they stood on was dull green, unruly and partly dead. If this was Mikey's world, wouldn't this field be more…Alive?_

_"Is this __**really **__Mikey's personal sanctum?" Don wondered aloud, he'd half-expected to see small animals running around or something._

_"Only one way to know." Raph said and bent over to pick up a flower. His brothers and father looked in curiosity as Raph plucked it from the ground…The put the flower head into his mouth. There was a __**crunch **__as he bit down and chewed._

_Seeing their curios stares, Raph, while still chewing, explained "It's made of __**candy; **__no doubt this is Mikey's world." Then swallowed the hardcandy-made flower._

_"How did you-?" Leo began, but stopped when Raph shrugged. It only made sense if you thought about it._

_"My sons, I believe we came here to find your brother." Master Splinter reminded them, a bit impatient._

_"Right Master Splinter." All three of them said in unison and they ran to the next puzzle piece._

_The next was a wooded area – but the ground was scorched and the tree's were war-torn, arrows struck out of the tree's and the ground and blood dripped from everywhere._

_The next one seemed to be a street in New York – a post-apocalyptic one – with rusty abandoned cars, collapsing run-down buildings and the pavement was torn up, making it difficult for them to move. _

_Then they came to what appeared to be their current Lair. It was in better condition than the other places, but it appeared to be abandoned and slowly crumbing away from misuse. _

_"Hey, look." Don called over and held out something, it was a photo album. He skimmed through the pages just as Raph and Leo came to look._

_A sad longing panged in the center of their chests when they saw each of the now dusty pictures. These weren't just pictures; these were 'shots' of Mikey's good memories._

_One from when they were first mutated, each of them lying against Master Splinter for warmth. One with Mikey as a tot on Master Splinters shoulders. Another with them as tots; Don reading a book, Mikey doodling on a piece of paper, Leo playing with a teddy bear and Raph playing with a toy car. _

_One showed them all on the porch of Casey's grandma's farmhouse. One showed Leo holding back an angry Raph wearing a pink mask as Don and Mikey were laughing. Another showed Don typing away on a computer, oblivious to Mikey sprinkling salt into his coffee mug. One showed Leo looking annoyed through the shaving cream on his face and hand._

_One picture showed Mikey and Raph bopping fists. Another showed Leo and Mikey sparring. Another showed Don and Mikey on the couch, Mikey was asleep and leaning his head on Don's shoulder. _

_Another of Master Splinter giving Mikey his fist pair of nunchaku. One with them fighting against the purple dragons on the streets. One with them fighting their dark clones from the future. Another with them training with Cody._

_"I miss the old Mikey." Don said sadly as he closed the album; nostalgia coming in waves. _

_Leo put a comforting hand on Donnie's shoulder "That's what we're here for Donnie; to find him and bring him back to us."_

_Raph didn't say anything; self-hatred, anger and pain evident in his amber eyes. Everyone could guess what was going through his head; this was all his fault. _

_Don put the album back where he got it and they jumped to the next puzzle piece. _

_This one resembled the room they'd first come to when they entered Mikey's mind; except this one wasn't as… well, dark or creepy. And it seemed more messy and lived-in._

_Leo gazed at a picture frame on the nightstand; it showed Mikey, Karai and Chaplin. Mikey was looking withdrawn; he looked sadly to the floor, even with Karai's hand on his shoulder. _

_This must have been a memory from before the Shredder came back and put him through the training._

_Finally they came to a puzzle piece that appeared to be their old Lair (__**A/N; The first one, the one they were forced out of because of Stockman's mousers**__) this one appeared to be used more, but it had a somewhat gloomy atmosphere._

_"Michaelangelo is here; let us search." Master Splinter said and headed to the old dojo. Leo and Donnie headed towards the living room. Raph, however, stood there and glanced around to see if the other turtle had left a clue to where he was._

_Ah hah – The door to Mikey's room was open a crack._

_Raph headed to the door and, very slowly, pushed it and entered._

_The room was dark, very dark, so dark even Raph a trained ninja could only see the inky outlines of the things in there; the room was cluttered, but Mikey wasn't lying on his bed. He was lying on the __floor__, almost as if he hadn't had the strength to make it to his bed. He was lying in a beam of light, a 'spotlight of shame' it seemed, that came from somewhere on the ceiling. The orange-masked turtle was lying on his side, his shell facing Raph._

_Quietly Raph crept the unconscious turtle; when he was closer he saw Mikey was coated in blood and littered with several unhealed injuries. Unscarred versions of the scars he had in reality; even the gouge in his shell. Raph flinched when he saw a trail of blood running down Mikey's legs leading down from under his shell and mixed with another fluid. Raph knew what that 'injury' was._

_"Mikey?" The red-masked turtle called gently, but the unconscious other did not even stir. Raph knelt down and put his hand on Mikey's shoulder and shook him "Bro, wake, please." _

_Slowly, dulled blue eyes opened a crack and gazed at Raph only to shut again._

_"No Mikey – Don't go back to sleep! You need to wake up." Raph said more firmly and shook his younger brother more. "We're here to bring you back, bro, please get up."_

_Mikey's dull eyes opened again, after several moments of Raph shaking him he finally said "But I don't wanna…its warm here, I'm tired…" his eyes closed again and he curled into a ball._

_Raph thought for a moment "Mikey, if you get up and come back with us, I promise you can sleep whenever you want; shell, even during training! Just wake up." He bargained._

_"Why should I go back?" The half-unconscious turtle snapped, "To be hurt more? To suffer as everyone around me suffers? I'm tired of it all, Raph! I'm so tired… Everything hurts…"_

_"You can't sleep your problems away Mikey." Raph urged and lifted the younger turtle up a bit. "Please, we'll help you; we'll help make the pain go away." _

_"…Promise?" Mikey asked hopefully and gazed at Raph._

_"I promise bro, now get up." Raph told him and lifted the other turtle to his feet. Seeing Mikey limp as they walked out, the red-masked hothead put Mikey's arm over his shoulder and supported him out._

_"Hey Raph?"_

_"Yeah?"_

_"I never told you… I…I love you, Raphael. Even after all this, I still do. Is that wrong?" _

_"I don't know Mikey…I just don't know. I love you too, ya know."_

_"I know. Can we ever...?"_

_"I wish Mikey, I really wish we could."_

* * *

><p>They snapped back to their bodies.<p>

"Did it work?" Leo asked aloud.

As if to answer, there was the sound of groaning. The family gathered around the youngest member as he slowly came too.

His eyes opened – they were groggy, tired and dull – but the dark shades of gray that had earlier clouded his eyes was swirling out of his iris and disappearing behind his pupil. The clouds of the storm were gone, his eyes were blue again.

Leo, Don and Raph couldn't help but grin.

"Who are you guys?" Mikey asked them confused, his voice was still gruff – that was probably permanent from smoking – but it was a slightly higher pitch and held a surfers accent.

His family looked at him in shock; **amnesia? ! **Ah…Shell!

Seeing their shocked and horrified faces, a half-hearted mischievous grin filled out Mikey's features.

"Got you!" He said and stared laughing "Ah man! You guys totally fell for it!"

Yup, Mikey was definitely back, well as 'back' as he can be.

* * *

><p><em>Don't think this is the end!<em>


	36. One hardcase was bad enough

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

* * *

><p><strong>Three weeks later...<strong>

"Brother, what happened to your shoulder! ?" Karai demanded as Mikey came into the lair; pain etched clearly on his face even though he tried hard not to show it; his shoulder was bandaged heavily but blood still seeped through.

"It's nothing, Karai." Mikey mumbled and rudely pushed past her; his teeth gnashed together when his arm swayed in motion and caused more pain to shoot from his shoulder.

Suddenly he found himself pinned to the wall; his shell scraping against it as Karai pushed him with her palm on his plastron. "What did you do to yourself?" She demanded sternly and pushed harder on his plastron to add emphasis to every word.

Mikey glared at his adoptive sibling and did not answer or push back.

"Michaelangelo; tell me what you did." Karai growled.

Mikey got up in her face "What are you going to do if I don't?" He challenged "Hit me? Fight me? I _know _you can never bring yourself to hurt me Karai." His tone was a mix between mocking and threatening.

Without second thoughts, Karai grabbed his arm – the one with the injured shoulder – turned around and pushed the back of her body against his and threw him over her shoulder.

Feeling his shoulder wrench, Mikey held the sharp cry of pain inside. He was slammed onto the Lair floor.

He was about to get up again but Karai placed a foot on his shell and held him down "I don't want to hurt you, brother; but I am not afraid to do so. Tell me what you did."

After several minutes of Mikey struggling he finally gave up. Karai removed her foot and offered him a hand up, which he took.

"What did you do?" Karai asked again.

Mikey sighed and looked to the floor "I…. I didn't want to keep looking at it Karai; the scars were enough…."

Karai put a comforting hand on his other shoulder "You really…?" she trailed off, horror edging on her voice.

"I did; but at least the cut was clean. At least in the Foot I learned how to ignore pain." He said and tried to walk away, but Karai held a firm grip on his shoulder.

"Donatello needs to look at it, brother." Karai said sternly and pushed him towards Don's lab.

Raph sighed watching this – he had a good guess what Mikey had done; skinned himself to get rid of the Foot tattoo on his shoulder. It wasn't that unbelievable, for the past few days he's been trying the scrape the thing off with slate.

In all honesty, they thought things would be better when they brought Mikey back; _but things weren't. They were worse. _

Sure, at first (as in the first five minutes) Mikey seemed to be his old, goofy self; but soon after depression set in. And Mikey was not reacting well to the depression; he was angry and depressed at the same time, the events of the past year finally catching up to him. The fire was over, but Mikey was left with the ashes. Mikey was also feeling guilty – for siding with the Shredder, for being pitted against them, for… well everything.

He lashed out so much now, temper flares at a fever pitch. Master Splinter said he needed time but…. That didn't seem to be enough. Hell, Mikey was snapping at Karai these days.

Not also that, but within the hour he 'woke up' he broke thing off with Leo. He said it wasn't what Leo did; he was being honest and said he didn't and never did feel that way for him. Leo however – still blamed himself and his actions. He spent all his time moping, he even missed training (Shocker, really.) and didn't really talk to anyone except Donnie.

Chaplin and Karai now seemed to be living with them, seeing as they couldn't go back to the Foot or the Shredder. They'd actually adjusted to life of hiding in the sewers pretty well; with Leo neglecting training because of his depression, Karai had become a student under Master Splinter, she even referred to him as 'sensei'. And Chaplin may not have been a ninja like the rest of them, but he was a genius; so he and Don got along exceedingly well. He even went to the junkyard with Don to visit 'The Professor'. Yeah two peas in a pod those two were.

For the most part Raph had decided to not alienate himself from the family, but he did not know how to fix this family situation; he could not solve things, he was sort of like the 'last line of defense' if things got too out of hand, he would be there.

For the most part Mikey and Raph kept separate from each other; though sometimes they would make eye content and just gaze at each other sadly; knowing nothing could ever be the same, knowing they feel the same way for each other but could never have a relationship like that.

Why did all of this crap have to happen to them? More turtle luck running true to form it seemed…

* * *

><p>Mikey's feet dangled over the edge of a building as he watched the city, the city was bright even though it was night. He was watching the city in contemplation, thinking deeply.<p>

Shame, guilt and self-hatred were heavy emotions at the bottom of his stomach; almost like he'd swallowed a rock. He had a bad, dry taste in his mouth to match.

His family….

Under the 'Angelo' personality influence, he'd not even hesitate to hurt people, ones he cared for or not, and then not care at the end what happened to them. But with that personality dormant and his normal one out, the original nature he was born with (Mutated with?) had returned. The nature to be open, to always care about how others felt.

The realization of his past actions put him in an emotionally numb state for about a week. If those actions weren't enough, he'd hurt Leo as soon as they brought him back from his inner sanctum. He didn't want to hurt Leo… But it would only hurt Leo more if he kept leading him on when he didn't feel the same. Leo blamed himself for what he did; even though being a possessive mate was normal. No matter how much Mikey tried to convince him that it was because he didn't feel the same, Leo still blamed that. Mikey was thankful that Donnie was being there for Leo right now, doing it out of true care, not to get the 'rebound' like most people would think.

And everyday he saw the anguish and horror on Karai's face every time she closed her eyes; everyday she was forced to relieve the horror she faced while imprisoned by her very own adoptive father. No matter how much Chaplin, Mikey or even Master Splinter tried to help her, this would obviously haunt her for the rest of her life no matter how much she tried to act like she was fine.

If only Karai had let him jump off the roof that day….. That's right; before Karai showed up that day over a year ago, he was seriously considering chucking himself over the rooftop.

She'd helped him so much; she'd been his friend and sister, actually allowed him close to her…. And because of him she'd been tortured.

And he'd betrayed his family! He had been part of the Foot, he let the Shredder brainwash him, he replaced Master Splinter with the Shredder himself, he did criminal dirty work for the Foot! Not only that, but he also fought them more than willingly, he hurt them, he tried to _rape _his _brother, _and whenever his family tried to help him, he still pushed them away, he was rude to them; episodes or no episodes he wasn't afraid to admit he didn't trust them. And for what? To justify that Raph had unintentionally forced himself on him?

He was a traitor.

He was a bad ninja.

He was a bad student.

He was a bad son.

He was a bad brother.

And now he was just sitting here, being all emo about it.

He needed to make things right; make it up to them for his treachery. Regain his honor.

Mikey growled when no idea came to him; _what _could he do? ! Frustration boiled in his blood and it pissed him off more; he got up from the edge and threw his body against the upraised wall of the roof door. Looked like he was going to have to literally beat ideas into his head.

His flesh started to get softer and bruised from constant abuse, but he didn't care, not even when his shoulder injury got worse.

More frustrated erupted and he found no other way to channel it other than to hurt himself.

Stupid beer, stupid Foot, stupid Shredder-!

"The Shredder." He growled and narrowed his dull blue eyes.

He left the rooftop and headed back to the Lair.

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><p><em>Two or three chapters left, my pretties!<em>


	37. Puppet and Marionette

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

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><p>"Karai, wake up Karai." The sound of her adoptive siblings voice broke through her semi-conscious state; Karai didn't want to allow herself to fall asleep all the way in fear of the nightmares that attacked her mind when she was asleep. An enemy she could not fight.<p>

Jade green eyes opened. "Michaelangelo." She greeted, her voice thick with fatigue; in hope he wouldn't have a relapse to his 'cruel Foot ninja' alternation, she stopped calling him 'Angelo' and by his actual name, or called him 'brother' when it would take too long to say his name (Come on, saying 'Michaelangelo' all the time would be a mouthful, Master Splinter gets away with it cuz...Well he's _Master Splinter_).

She was lying on his bed (With her and Chaplin now living with the Turtles, she insisted on staying in Michaelangelo's room while Chaplin bunked with Leonardo for some reason) and he was the side of the bed, a focused look in his dull blue eyes and he was holding a duffle bag. He had his _Jumonji-Yari _strapped to his back and hanging off of his belt were both his _nunchaku _and _chigiriki._

"Karai, I want you to come with me somewhere." He told her.

"What for?"

"You'll see."

"Brother, why can't you tell me?"

"Karai; I want you to trust me on this, just follow me."

"Brother…"

"Sister, every mission we ever did together while in the Foot, I followed you and your orders without question; for once, do the same for me, _please_."

* * *

><p>They were jumping rooftops; it'd been so long since she had been outside, being in hiding meant she was confined to the Turtles lair, she was thankful she was but…. At the same time, they're Lair was in a <em>sewer. <em>She sucked in as much fresh air as she could and savored it, it made some of the heaviness of depression lift a bit.

Michaelangelo was leading; the contents of his duffle bad shifted and clanged – whatever was inside, it was metal.

When they got deeper into the dark New York City, Karai realized where they were heading and the cold, sharp fangs of fear attached themselves to her and injected her with paralyzing numbness.

"No!" She cried out and stopped; not wanting to go back there.

"Please Karai." He coaxed "Just trust me, nothing will happen."

Before she could argue, he got right in front of her, facing her and put his three-fingered hands on her shoulders.

"_Please Karai, just trust me. They won't hurt you again. I love you sister, and I will never let anyone hurt you while I'm alive! Please trust me._"

* * *

><p>They entered the chamber very stealthily; Michaelangelo beckoned her to on of the ledges on the High ceiling. Scaling up one of the support beams in the dark; she perched herself somewhere she would surely not be seen and watched.<p>

"SHREDDER! I HAVE COME TO CHALLENGE YOU!" Michaelangelo bellowed and set his duffle bag down. Like freaky magic all the candles in the previously dark room lit up and the entire room was swallowed with light. Karai folded her limbs closer to her body to make herself smaller so she could still not be seen.

Fully clad in armor…. Bladed gauntlets and all, robotic red eyes gleaming through his helmet; The Shredder, Ch'rell, Oroku Saki…. He with many names walked out from behind a long red Foot banner and strode to Michaelangelo. He stopped several yards away.

"Angelo my son, you have returned… Returned for your doom."

"You make me sick. We will end this here and now; you've been a sword to my family's throat for too long! I will be your end. And another thing…. _MY NAME IS HOMATO MICHAELANGELO, SON OF SPLINTER_!"

"Strange. I could have sworn I erased all forms of sentience from your mind."

"You did. _Big mistake. _Maybe if I had some left, I would consider letting you live, but that's not the case. I challenge you Ch'rell…. _For the mantle of the Shredder! _Loser dies while the victor walks away with his life, the Foot clan and the title of the Shredder."

"Why would I accept this? !"

"Do you _fear _me? You've gone soft! Do you fear that you will lose to me? Who's the puppet and who's the marionette?"

"I fear no one! I am the Shredder!"

"Then prove it, _dare_ to fight me!"

"I accept your challenge! You will regret this, the last day your miserable heart beats!"

"Bring on you slimy alien _worm!_"

Karai watched, frozen as the most gruesome battle she'd ever witnessed unfolded right in front of her.

* * *

><p><em>Ten minutes into the fight Mikey flipped away from the Shredder and stood firmly on his feet; days like this he was glad he had boundless energy. But at the same time he cursed the Shredders robotic body, which didn't have physical limits like Mikey's. So far he and the Shredder had only locked blades; Shredders katana and Mikey's Jumonji-Yari.<em>

_Mikey flicked his dull blue gaze to the duffle bag, which he was still carrying. He put his Jumonji-Yari back on to the strap on his back, dodged a strike from the Shredder and quickly drew out offensive twin katana; blue cloth wrapped around the handles._

_His brothers would not appreciate he had taken their weapons if they woke up before the end of this fight – but they would get them back. _

_With a war cry Mikey pushed back at the Shredder and stuck with the katana; using one of them to block one of the Shredders own katana and slipping the other to slip between the two blades on one of the Shredders gauntlets._

_In a swift movement he disarmed the Shredder of his gauntlet and katana. He then did a butterfly twist over Shredders head, landed on his feet and did a reverse crescent kick._

_The Shredder caught his foot, twisted and slammed Mikey against the ground. His head slammed against the hardwood floor, but luckily his shell absorbed most of the force for his body (_One of those 'I love being a turtle' moments_). The Shredder raised his remaining gauntlet and brought it down. Mikey rolled out of the way just at the right second._

_Mikey flipped back onto his feet, put the katana away and took out a purple-wrapped Bo staff out. _

_He spun the Bo staff whist charging and tried to use a sweep-motion to trip him. The Shredder surprised him by jumping over the Bo staff and right at him._

_Mikey cried out when he felt the Shredders blades score down one side of his face. He quickly backwards-leaped away, his eyes shut tightly._

_The orange-banded turtle panted as his now ripped mask loosely fell off from being cut. Mikey opened his eyes – only to find he could only open his right eye – his left on hurt too much and the entire left side of his face was covered in blood. Oh no – he lost his left eye!_

_Enmity heated up his blood; withdrawing the Bo staff back into the duffle bag, Mikey let out an enraged roar and attacked the Shredder full-on._

_For over half an hour it was a attack-and-dodge contest, only about half of the hits hitting the other, neither giving up their offense or defense._

_Finally, Mikey drew out red-wrapped sai's and locked them around the blades of Shredders gauntlets. He pulled the gauntlet off and tossed them away. The Shredder was effectively weaponless._

_But that did not make the Shredder weaker._

_Fifteen minutes of fighting later Mikey was thrown against a support beam again; his chest plate was crack with blood seeping through, his left wrist was sprained, his was limping, his body was sore and bruised from punches; with his left eye out the Shredder had the advantage over him._

_'_Need to…level it out…_' Mikey thought and shut his right eye and used his other senses instead; it was like Foot training, it wasn't so much hearing he was relying on as feeling._

_Vibrations growing stronger, metallic clinking getting louder; it was coming from his left side. He flipped and did a one-handed cartwheel away from the Shredder before the alien could kick him._

_With his eyes still closed, Mikey got into offensive stance and just held still._

_Metallic clinking…_

_Mikey withdrew the katana and just in time swung both out so the butt of one of the swords between the Shredders torso and with the other sword sliced Shredders gauntlet-less, robotic right hand off._

_Mikey then moved back several paces and charged back with a 540 tornado kick to the Shredders torso._

_"GAHH!" The Shredder grunted and Mikey finally opened his good eye; the Shredders robotic body was on the ground and now the torso was opened up, revealing the blue-scarred red utrom inside._

_Mikey flicked the utrom out of it's metallic shell and threw the slimy thing against the wall – he got the thing cornered and for the first time, the Shredder looked afraid._

_Mikey took the sai's. "For Raphael!" he growled and pinned the utrom down by impaling its short tentacles to pin it to the ground. Purple blood smeared the floor as the alien cried out. There, vengeance for Raph's suffering. He took out the katana again "For Leonardo!" he growled and used the katana to cut off the rest of the tentacles, now vengeance for the time he had all of his foot soldiers attack Leo and then attacked them at April's place. "For Chaplin!" Using Don's Bo staff (the Shredder didn't so anything to Don) he whacked the alien repeatedly; vengeance for having the Foot ninja hurt Chaplin. He took out his nunchaku and struck the utrom hard with it "For putting me through Hell!", vengeance for subjecting him to the training and brainwashing him. Then he took out a Tanta and cut off a portion of the aliens shapeless body "For Karai!". The barely-living alien stared in fear when he took out the last weapon – a sword, but not just any sword, the sword that belonged to Homato Yoshi. "For Master Yoshi!"_

_The blade fully impaled the alien, going right through his body._

_Ironic, the last words the Shredder, Ch'rell ever heard before he (finally) died, spoken by Michaelangelo, were the last words ever said by Homato Yoshi._

_"He who lives without honor, will end without honor"_

_The Shredder had indefinably, been defeated, by his own student. The most evil entity in the universe was finally destroyed forever._

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><p><em>I think about two more chapters left<em>


	38. Tidings

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Lai****rd, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

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><p><strong>Seven months later…<strong>

Donnie yawned and withdrew from his mate Leo's plastron – tiredly he glanced around the Christmas decorated Lair: with stockings, a fully decorated and colorful tree, and the Christmas lights setting a soft, merry tone in the room. It was a week before Christmas. He should have felt happy about the holidays but….

"Donnie…" Leo whined cutely in his sleeping state and wrapped the arms Don had been lying in to pull the purple-banded turtle back against his plastron. Donnie smiled and nestled his head in the crook of his mates leaf-green neck.

For four months now they had been mates.

Seven months before a rather empowered-looking Karai had come into their Lair in the morning and gave them a duffle bag that held their missing weapons – all of them stained with purple blood.

She told them that the Shredder was dead, the Foot was disbanded, she was the now the head of the Oroku corporation and Mikey was gone.

_Gone._

She would not tell them if by gone she meant that he was dead, or if he'd just left. She (quote) said "It is best to just say he is gone."

The same day Master Splinter had finally come up with a punishment for Raphael about 'the incident' with Mikey that Splinter had held off; temporarily, Raph was exiled from the family until he learned to finally control his anger.

Neither Mikey or Raph were home yet and they didn't even know if Mikey was even alive, Raph either because he hasn't contacted them in his time of exile. It was just Master Splinter, Donnie and Leo left.

In this time of loneliness, Donnie and Leo grew close; Donnie eased Leo's pain from his break up with Mikey. They figured out that Leo's 'love' for Mikey had been mismatched feelings that had arisen from how Leo felt when Mikey was in Japan, he missed him, thought about him more and believed he loved Mikey.

But now Leo and Donnie were together, things had happened as they grew closer and the relationship… 'Just happened'. They really loved each other; Leo didn't love Mikey (romantically) anymore and together Donnie and Leo made each other happy. They were living on the fruits of love.

But the Lair seemed gloomy with half of their family missing; it just sucked the happiness out of the holidays.

* * *

><p>"Hello Karai, Happy holidays." Don greeted as he opened the Lair door to find Karai and Chaplin outside; Karai holding a small sack filled with presents.<p>

Karai gave Donnie and smile as he stepped aside and allowed them inside. "Happy holidays Donatello, we bring presents."

Even if she would not tell them what happened to Mikey; she stayed relatively close to the Homato clan, she visited frequently, but not to train, she couldn't train much anymore.

Why couldn't she train? Well, maybe if you looked at her stomach…

That's right; Karai was pregnant, eight months to be exact; luckily it wasn't the result of rape while she was captured by the Foot; it was Chaplin's baby (as proved by DNA tests), conceived days before she was captured. They were so happy about it, too.

"Donnie, who's at the…Oh hey Karai, Chaplin." Leo said as he came up, a mug of hot chocolate in one hand. Leo and Karai were on friendly terms now.

"Hey wassup guys?" said Chaplin sheepishly as he and Karai headed towards to coffee table; Karai set the sack down.

"We have some things for you guys too." Donnie said and rushed to the tree to retrieve the presents for Karai and Chaplin.

"Leonardo." Karai said as she sat down "I fell it is time I tell you about our brother."

Leo instantly tensed up; when she said 'our' brother, she meant Mikey. He sat down. "Wait for Donnie." He said.

Donnie came back, set the presents down in front of Karai and Chaplin; he then sat next to Leo.

"Donatello; we have come here to tell you what happened many months ago, and what has happened to Michaelangelo." Karai told him.

They called Master Splinter over before they let Kara start.

"He felt guilty," Karai started "Michaelangelo wanted to make things right with you all. To do so, he challenged the Shredder to a fight and the battle was brutal; but in the end Michaelangelo stood victorious."

The three remaining Homato members gasped; Mikey had defeated the Shredder? !

Karai continued "The victor did not only get to live, but he who lived also claimed the mantel of the Shredder…"

* * *

><p>"<em>I did it for you Karai." Mikey said as he trudged towards his sister who had jumped down from the roof. She was on her knees from shock. Mikey hadn't wiped the blood from the left side of his face yet.<em>

"_I have no family…" Karai whispered, tears welling in her jade eyes. Evil or not, Oroku Saki was her father and she was his daughter._

"_Wrong, Karai." Mikey whispered and kneeled next to her. He pulled her into a hug. "You still have me Karai, your brother. You still have Chaplin, your lover. We love you Karai."_

_She hugged back but when he withdrew she didn't rise from her knees. Mikey turned away and collected the scattered gauntlets before putting them on his own hands._

"_Karai, call over all the Foot ninja; we have a meeting that needs to go underway." Mikey told her and picked up the Shredders helmet._

_Shakily Karai went over to an intercom and called over all the Foot ninja._

* * *

><p><em>Thirty minutes later all the Foot ninja were gathered.<em>

"_Foot clan!" the loud voice of Michaelangelo boomed as he stepped from behind the long Foot banner; all the Foot ninja gasped that he was wearing the Shredders helmet and gauntlet (He can't wear the armor… because you know, he has a shell.)_

_The remaining Foot elite drew out their weapons._

"_I," Mikey said with the helmet still on "Homato Michaelangelo, formally known as Oroku Angelo, have defeated Oroku Saki; the mantle of the Shredder and the Foot clan belong to me now!"_

_The ninja were about to argue; but then hushed silence befell them as Mikey took out a sword – on it, the dead, maimed, alien utrom body of Ch'rell was impaled._

"_Bow down!" He commanded, for a few seconds the Foot clan was still but slowly they got on their knees and bowed._

"_Foot clan, as the new Shredder…" he trailed off "I officially disband the Foot clan."_

_The foot ninja gasped._

"_Also, I permanently retire as the Shredder." He took off the helmet, showing his slashed, bloodied face._

_He turned away._

* * *

><p><em>15 minutes later…<em>

_They stood in the Oroku corporation office building. Mikey near the window, wearing a black trench coat and fedora and Karai on the other side of the desk._

"_Your leaving? !" Karai gasped._

"_Please understand Karai… There are some things I need to work out on my own. I hate to leave you hanging but… I just have to go Karai, I promise I'll be back one day. Your free of the Shredder now."_

"_But brother…Huh…It is your decision to leave my brother, but please, now that the Oroku Corporation is mine, I have something to give you for your time away." Quickly she took something from the desk - a credit card – and handed it to him._

"_What, why this?" He asked confused and stored the card under his belt._

"_There is ten thousand dollars in there."_

"_Karai, that's too much!"_

"_Please take it brother – I cannot ever repay you for all you have done for me, but please take it so I can know you can at least get things you need."_

"_Ugh… Okay Karai. Thank you." He hugged her and handed her the duffle bag. "Take the weapon's back t my brothers at dawn. And please just…Make sure they don't know that I'm leaving, wait a while I want to make sure they won't try to find me. The should hate me, Karai, after all I've done! I don't belong with them anymore… they say they don't but they hate me, they hate me because they should, because all I do is hurt them. Goodbye, my sister, I love you." _

_And he leapt out of the open window; it was the last Karai saw of him._

* * *

><p>Don sat on the couch in silence; five minutes ago Karai and Chaplin left after Karai finished the tale. He was in deep though.<p>

'_Oh Mikey..._' he thought and stared into space '_We don't hate you; it wasn't your fault your head was messed up. Please come home…We don't hate you…Raph, we're not mad at you anymore, please come home too._'

Donnie just wanted his brothers home for Christmas, was that too much to ask?

* * *

><p>Michaelangelo snapped awake when he felt something; something like… Someone was calling out for him?<p>

In the past seven months his injuries had healed; he actually hadn't lost his left eye, but the left side of his face was scarred with two long, dark-green slash lines. And his shoulder where he skinned himself had healed into a pale green patch, which he covered with black cloth that used to be his Foot mask. He wore a new orange mask now.

He was lying on a nest of straw, several heavy blankets draped over him and the nest; he was wearing a trench coat and a fedora. He was inside of a cave on a snowy mountain; the blizzard outside was fierce, snow and cold wind whipped violently outside. But the inside of the cave was warm from the fire inside of the cave, which cast light throughout the cozy cave.

He set his head back down on the down pillow; he was lying on his shell and he had a pillow on his plastron, but the pillow was not for him…

The blankets over his plastron shifted and a small, brown, dusky-brown head popped out from under the covers; wide, sleepy amber eyes stared at him.

"Father?" The small girl asked curiously, she had felt him wake up.

"Go back to sleep, Moth." He soothed. The little human blinked and withdrew back under the covers, her head resting on the pillow that lay on his plastron. In seconds her breathing pattern became slower signaling she was asleep.

He stared outside at the whipping blizzard; the feeling in the center of his plastron would not go away, someone was calling to him and he knew it. The feeling was…. Warm, light and comforting. It felt like… Love.

He knew what it meant; it was time to go home for the Holidays.

* * *

><p>Raphael focus was suddenly broken by a twinge in the center of his plastron; a feeling. The punk he had pinned to wall was shaking. "Get outta here." Raph hissed lowly in his Brooklyn drawl and let the punk run off.<p>

Raph stared up at the dark sky; the pollution of city lights blocking out the stars.

He felt something…. Like someone was calling out to him, he just couldn't hear or see them…. But he could feel them. Almost like a ghost.

Raph tipped the brim of his fedora down lower and shoved his hands in the trench coat pockets.

For months Raph had struggled to learn to control his anger…. But finally he could, he could now let punks go without hurting them, just…scaring them off. Sure, violence and anger was a permanent part of his character, but he never let it get to an extreme, it was because of his temper he'd lost that fight with the Shredder, he let the Shredders false words get to him.

The red masked turtle walked into the darkness and shadows of the gritty city alleyway. The feeling in his chest just kept expanding; more and more warmth filled the former empty void; it was love he felt.

It was a sign it was time to go home, after all Christmas was just around the corner.

New Jersey sucked anyways.

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><p><em>One more Chapter and an Epilogue!<em>

_Review if you want to see the next chapter and find out about 'Moth'_

_More about Raph, Mikey and their seven months gone next chapter_


	39. Mikey and Moth trek to NYC

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

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><p>"Sensei? Why we leave home?" Moth, a child with short wild dusky-brown hair and wide owlish amber eyes, asked; her words spaced because the four-year-old was being careful with saying them right, her tone sad as Mikey continued to pack their things into a worn traveling backpack. Moth was sitting on the nest of straw that had served as their bed<p>

The blizzard was over, but their were thick banks of snow outside; inside of their home of the past six months (the cave) the fire was stamped out besides a few glowing embers, the blankets and pillows were packed up but the straw nest was still in tact, the wide wooden plank where Mikey tacked all of Moths drawings was now bare because Mikey had plucked the drawing off and stored them away into the backpack. Their food store (a small crevice in the cave that was always chilly so food was stored inside) was also empty besides a few inedible plant stems and animal bones. The 'shelves' that were naturally carved into the cave walls where they put their small trinkets and other things was stripped bare except for the pots, pans and cooking utensils they could not bring with them, even some of the folded blankets they could not bring. And the metal basin Mikey bathed Moth in would be left behind as well.

Moth obviously was not happy about them leaving their cozy cave home.

Mikey gave his daughter a sad smile and carefully settled all of the stuff inside and zipped the backpack. "I'm taking you to my real home –we'll live there from now on. You'll love it there." He promised her and set the backpack on his shoulders before picking Moth up; she obviously could not walk this journey, so he would have to carry her – but that was okay – on trips to town he always carried her. Good thing he was a trained ninja, or carrying everything would be painful.

Mikey was wearing a thick long-sleeved dark shirt, with dark sweatpants and an extra thick trench coat complete with a matching fedora. He pulled the open edges of the trench over Moth, who settled into her fathers arms instantly and fell asleep as their journey begun.

Mikey glanced back at the cave one last time; the dim light out from the stubborn embers finally dying. "Goodbye, home away from home." He said sadly and embarked on the long trek back to New York.

* * *

><p>No, Moth was not his real daughter – it was kinda obvious. She was human, and four years old (So, she was born around the time Mikey was sixteen) and he was a <em>mutant<em> turtle and therefore, sterile. And besides, he was pretty sure that even if he _wasn't _sterile, it would be impossible to conceive children with a human female, and there were no female mutant turtles around. Moth was his daughter the same way he was Master Splinter's son; he adopted her from the street.

Whenever he left seven months ago, he was sure he would never learn to love again. But whatever force ruled the universe seemed to have pity on him; after about a week of wondering aimlessly he was given a purpose again.

He was hanging around a shack where homeless people were crashing, when he overhead a couple of hobo's talking – they mentioned a homeless girl who had recently been orphaned. They said the girl was only three and had been homeless her entire life – but she was surviving the streets, without medication she survived even the nastiest of sicknesses, she was still alive and kicking even though she rarely ever got food. She had just lost her mother, but she was still trying to survive.

Hearing about the girl, Mikey decided she was a born-warrior.

He didn't know what overcame him; but he wondered around the town and searched for this girl by asking the local homeless; he felt a sort of longing towards to girl he'd heard about.

Then he found her – only three years old, in the back of an alley, lying in a big cardboard box and using newspapers as blankets, she was asleep and holding an old, ragged, ratty-looking rabbit toy.

He felt instantly attached – she needed someone to take care of her and he was there so he took her out of the box and carried her with him.

Even though she was only a three year old, the toddler was a little mystified at a giant mutant talking turtle, for a few days she was a little scared of him, but overtime she seemed to imprint him as her caretaker. In fact, she seemed to have forgotten her past now as saw Mikey as her father.

He named her Homato Moth (Middle name 'Buonarroti' which was the famous artist Michelangelo's last name.) Why did he name her 'Moth' and not a famous artist? Well, there were very few famous women in the renaissance and the whole 'renaissance name ninja' thing only seemed to fit for a mutant turtle…. He chose the name 'Moth' because when he found her in the alley, there were a bunch of moths fluttering around her for some reason, which was weird because there wasn't any light around her or anything.

He knew he couldn't keep traveling with a child, so he decided to settle in a cave on the mountain where it was snowy in the winter, rainy in the fall, alive in the spring and warm in the summer. And it was isolated where no other human could find them. It was around summer when they settled down there and it was the only home Moth knew. And it wasn't too far away from a cushy little mountain town where he could get supplies if they needed any. In the forest he would hunt and gather food, there were streams where he could get water that he'd boil in a kettle to purify. And the cave had a clearing where he could train Moth.

Oh, he was training her in ninjitsu; he did as soon as she was strong enough, Master Splinter had done the same with him and his brothers after all. Her strengths in fighting seemed to be speed, timing and balance and not so much in physical strength. Her reflexes, even now at a young age were impressive. She would make a great ninja. As a weapon, Mikey at first considered giving her nunchaku or _chigiriki, _but in the end decided that the best weapon to fit her fighting style would be twin swords like Leo.

Her personality was a sort-of mix between Donnie's and Leo's. She was quiet, shy and soft-spoken like Donnie (but not a brainiac like him), but fearless and hardy like Leo, also like Leo ninjitsu was a second nature to her.

Having a student and daughter helped Mikey a lot – he learned to love again. And it regained his old personality traits he thought the Shredder had destroyed. He regained his love of comics, because he was trying to teach Moth how to read things but made sure they had a lot of pictures in it and comics fit, she loved comics as much as he did. Having to keep a toddler entertained also brought up some of his old childish behavior. He was like his old self again… accept, more serious and grown up, but not too much. And he was sure he had control it if he ever had a 'relapse'. So far, his Angelo personality was still dormant, so he Multiple-Personality Disorder was dormant as well. He even got the 'dude' surfer accent back.

Mikey loved Moth as if she really was his own, and in a way she was. He just wished he could have met her mother before she passed on. Hopefully the dead woman was happy he'd taken her daughter in and was raising her as a ninja. It was sad Moth had no memory of her mother because her mind was so young. Memories that would last her as she grew up would only start around the time she turned five, after all.

When they arrived in the mountain town, Mikey bought a small backpack that Moth could carry which he filled with some extra food – some apples, some dried fruit, some jerky and trail mix. One lingering Foot habit was his insecurity with junk food, normally he never got any for Moth, but mostly that was to keep her immune system strong (Not everyone can have the amazingly strong immune system of a sewer-dwelling mutant turtle after all) but he decided to get a few candy bars too, he occasionally got treats for her when they had to travel to town, and this would be a pretty long journey.

Then Mikey hitched a ride on the back of a Truck (Like the 'Trucker' trucks) and hid himself and Moth behind a few of the crates. Around this time Moth was waking up.

"When we get t'your home?" Moth asked sleepily and rubbed her amber eyes.

Mikey chewed on some jerky before answering "Soon Moth. We'll be with our family for Christmas, I'm sure of it." He said with a smile and kicked back a handful of trail mix. The trek from the mountain to the town had got his appetite going.

Propping his backpack so it was a make-shift pillow, Mikey set his head on it; but with Moth wide awake he gave her a comic book, some drawing paper, a pencil and crayons to keep herself entertained. He pulled a blanket out from his traveling pack and pulled it over him, then sleep over came him.

* * *

><p><em>Two days later…<em>

New York, NY. Home…

It hadn't changed, he could see as he passed April's antique shop, he was tempted to go in but he knew he should see his family before anyone else. This time Moth was walking, having gotten stir crazy being carried all the time. The four-year-old was staring at the big city in wonderment. How bright it was even though it was late at night!

"This new home, Father?" She squeaked happily, she twiddled with the tails of her green ninja mask (**A/N: Moth wears a ninja mask because she always see's Mikey wearing one, her mask is green. She also always wears a black sleeveless turtle-neck and black shorts. She also wears gear, but not like the turtles, hers it the type of elbow/knee pads people wear in volleyball, like her clothes its black.**)

"Not quite; we live under the City, we have to hide remember?" He reminded her, she nodded. For as long as he'd had her, he'd taught her to always stay hidden and hide in the shadows. "We call this place the 'sewers'. It smells worse than our old home, but it'll grow on you." He said as he lifted s manhole cover.

He picked Moth up with one arm and entered the sewers.

He never thought he'd miss the smell of sewer water, but it was rather welcoming. To him at least, Moth crinkled her nose when he set her down.

"Hmm…I left it here somewhere..." Mikey said as he searched in some of pipes before pulling a skateboard out of one where it had been hidden by rubble.

"This is a skateboard, my child." He said to his daughter and lifted her again "It'll get us home faster. To your uncles Donnie, Leo and Raph, and Grandfather Splinter." Oh, Moth knew about Mikey's family; even Karai and Chaplin, he always told her stories of them.

"You think they like me?" The dusky-brown haired child asked shyly and curled against his plastron – his plastron always being a 'safe place' to her.

"They'll _love_ you, my child, just like I do." The sea-green terrapin assured and boarded down the sewers, back to the Lair. They will love Moth, because he won't get rid of her if they don't.

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><p>The Lair was dark, except for the florescent glowing of the cheery Christmas lights; Moth was staring at the Christmas decorations and Lair in awe; she squirmed in his arms, the overbearing need to explore this new place beginning to root her actions.<p>

"Hold on Moth – Our family is asleep, I'll take you to my room and you can meet them in the morning, okay? It's late." He scowled and carried his daughter to his room – which hadn't been tampered with at all since he left all those months ago.

Exhausted, he dropped the traveling backpack in the corner, took Moth's off of her back, took off the human clothes and hat, and then left them on the floor.

"Comics!" Chirped Moth excitedly as she pawed through a stack of comics. Well, she was distracted so Mikey left his room and went into the kitchen for a drink.

Mikey opened the fridge and pulled out a soda, but then he heard the noise before he could drink it; the sound of the Lair entrance opening. Instantly defensive he snuck out of the kitchen unheard and tackled the dark shape that stood on the edge of the living room.

"What the shell? !" The intruder said.

Mikey knew that gruff, Brooklyn drawl.

"…Raph?" He asked and peeled himself off the person he had pinned. Quickly he ran to the wall and flipped the switch.

Indeed there stood Raph; wearing a brown trench coat and brown fedora, staring at Mikey as if he'd vanish into thin air.

"…Raph?" Mikey repeated and stepped closer; the other turtle would not move. He waved his hand in front of Raph's "Yo, anyone in there?" Mikey asked with a snicker.

"Mikey…It's you…. You're alive…. You're here…" Raph whispered finally and got closer to the younger turtle. Ah, Karai must not have told Raph he wasn't dead.

"Shell and all." Mikey said with a shrug and crossed his arms with a small smile; he was happy to see Raph, he really was. He was no longer afraid of Raph; he didn't blame him for the incident either. He'd always carry the pain in his heart, but it was bearable. He still loved Raph after all.

"I'm dreamin'…. Gotta be dreamin'..." Raph mumbled and turned away looking sad. Grinning, Mikey put a hand to Raph's shoulder and whirled the dark-green turtle to face him again.

"Look Raphael." Mikey said and pointed at the ceiling above them. Confused amber eyes slowly turned to the ceiling.

Mistletoe.

"Mikey…" Raph trailed; this had to be a dream…. Had to be…

"Quiet Raph." Mikey shushed before pressing his beak to Raphs, surprising himself to find he felt no fear. It felt... right.

Churring, Mikey wrapped his arms around Raph's neck and pressed their plastrons together. Raphael got over the shock and wrapped his own arms around Mikey and returned the kiss full force.

Their tongues danced for dominance, their eyes locked together, their heat mingling together from the close contact…. Nothing could be better, caught up in this passion. The passion and love they had for each other but could never before show to one another.

Finally, they broke apart but they were still locked in an embrace. Mikey rested his head on Raph's shoulder.

"When did you get home?" Raph asked.

"Fifteen minutes ago, actually; why were you out?"

"I wasn't out….I just got home like you."

"…Huh?"

"When ya put up ya disapearin' act, Masta' Splinta' exiled me until I could control my tempa'."

"Did you really learn how to control it?"

"I got in a brawl with Purple Dragon's earlier…. And none of them went into the hospital."

"_Wow…_Where'd you go?"

"New Jersey. What about you?"

"A mountain range somewhere in Minnesota."

"What were ya doin' there?"

"I had to stick to one place, I couldn't travel."

"Why?"

Mikey sighed and drew away from Raph before taking the others dark green hand "It's kinda a long story, so I'll just show you." He led the confused older turtle to his room. Slowly he opened the door "Look," he said and pointed as his bed.

You can imagine Raph's surprise when he saw a small human child sitting on Mikey's bed and staring wide-eyed at the comic book she held in hand.

"Is that a…. Kid?" Raph asked, still surprised.

"_No, _Raph. That's not a _kid_; it's a small, young, underdeveloped human." Mikey responded sarcastically.

Raph was silent, many questions thought but none said.

"That's my daughter – Moth Buonarroti Homato – I adopted her a little bit after I left." Mikey explained to him.

"…._Moth?_" Raph said with a small snort and a look on his face that clearly said 'what kind of f-ing name is that?'.

"Shut up." Mikey pouted and crossed his arms; at least he was original with her name. Raph would probably name her something stupid or cliché… Oh wait, Raph wouldn't want anything to do with a kid except put them somewhere safe where someone else would take care of them.

Moth's eyes suddenly averted from the comic book and to them; her head cocked to the side in confusion when she saw two masked turtles rather than one. "Sensei? Who that?" She asked, trying to remember which one of her uncles wore a red mask.

"This is Raphael." He said and pointed at Raph, who just blinked.

"Are you…really going to…?" Raph trailed off.

"She's my daughter Raph, I'm keeping her." Mikey whispered sternly.

"She's not even really yours!"

"Yeah, well we weren't 'really' Splinter's either." Said Mikey coldly.

It was then that they heard a gasp behind them.

The two turtles whirled around and came face to face with two other turtles; only these two wore blue and purple.

* * *

><p>They all sat in the living room; everyone was awake now, but silent all unsure of what to do or say; Don And Leo were sitting on one couch, Mikey and Raph on another and Master Splinter in a chair; the aged rat had a rather annoyed look on his muzzle, but that was because Moth was climbing all over him by tugging at his fur; mutant ninja turtles she was used too, but a giant rat was new.<p>

"So…." Mikey broke the silence sheepishly and put on a cheesy grin "…..We're like… Home…. What, no 'welcome home' party?"

"We thought you were dead, Mikey." Don said to him, still a little overcome "…Well, until recently, Karai told us…"

"That you're the new Shredder." Leo finished.

Raph stared at Leo as if he had two heads; he didn't hear Karai's story after all.

"I retired the mantle of the Shredder, didn't Karai tell you that?" said Mikey with a shrug; though he didn't like being referred to as 'the new Shredder.' The only reason he challenged the mantel of the Shredder was so that when the Shredder was defeated, then the 'mantle' of the Shredder would not be passed on to Karai, but to him instead.

"…..What the shell are you guys talkin' about?" Raph demanded.

"See these?" Mikey pointed at the darker sea green scars that ran down the left side of his face "Before I left; I fought the Shredder and got these nice little _reminders_." His voice lowered to a venomous hiss.

"_What?_" Raph gasped in disbelief, he did remember that before he himself left Karai told them the Shredder was dead but he never thought… "A-And you defeated him?"

"What can I say?" Mikey said with a wider grin "Mikey got game!"

His family (save for Moth, who was tugging at Splinter's whiskers this time) dead panned.

Mikey was back alright, in more ways than one.

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><p><em>I'm lazy so lets just leave it at that; Next chapter we will have the Homato family Christmas! WHOOHOO! And <strong>then <strong>the epilogue._

_Hmm... You know guys, it isn't too late for a lemon. *grins innocently*_

_Read, review and get the next chapter!_

_Note; Do any of you guys actually mind Moth? I planned on her for a long time and I'm just wondering if anyone likes her, because I'm thinking of using her in other stories._


	40. Christmas is a time for miracles

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

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><p>Mikey smiled and sipped his hot chocolate, he leaned back on the rchair with his feet on the table.<p>

It was Christmas morning: in the past few days since he got home Mikey had been busy tying up loose ends and introducing Moth to their friends. He also got some Christmas shopping done; his family had already had presents for him and Raph in hope they'd be home for Christmas this year, and they barely managed to get Moth presents in time.

He learned that his adoptive sister Karai was pregnant with Chaplin's child, that April and Casey were now expecting a child of their own and that Leo and Don were mates now: he felt happy for them all, he really did, he was also glad that Leo was over him and with Donnie.

In the past three days with Mikey busy, Moth had time to adjust to the Lair and bond with her new family; Master Splinter already had a fondness for the human child, Leo and Donnie also started treating her as if their own, so did Raph even, but that was mostly because Moth seemed to like to follow Raph around for some reason; in fact the other day she saw him whack at the punching bag and she mimicked the action (Whatever runs the universe, please don't let her grow up to be like Raph!). Though the others would help with training, Mikey made sure he was Moth's sensei, he made that clear with the others.

So far, things looked good.

Now on this morning Mikey had already opened his presents – a pocket watch from Master Splinter, a pack of special shading pencils from Donnie, a special edition Claymore manga (Claymore is an anime, I'm not sure if it's a manga though) from Leo, metal wrist bands from Raph (these would cover up his wrists better), a new video game console from Chaplin, special Chinese paint brushes from Karai, a chefs hat from April, and a custom-made orange t-shirt with the words '**I became a badass Foot ninja and all I got was this lousy T-shirt**' on the front from Casey.

Mikey had gotten everyone presents while he was away traveling (Either in the past seven months or while he was training in Japan); For Master Splinter he got him a new robe and special incense from Japan, for Don some alien utrom tech he smuggled while he was in the Foot, for Leo a dragon pendant with the kanji symbol for 'blue' engraved on the back, a jade necklace for April with matching ear cuffs, small twin wooden ninja swords for Moth(he'll give her real swords when she's older), a leather jacket for Casey, a pair of Tonfa for Chaplin, emerald ear cuffs for Karai and a dragon pendant (different from Leo's) with the kanji symbol for 'red' engraved in the back for Raph.

Mikey was sitting at the table, drinking hot chocolate and watching the others; Donnie and Leo were snuggled up against each other on the couch, April and Casey were watching a Christmas special with Master Splinter, Moth was chasing Klunk around the Lair, and Karai and Chaplin were sitting at the table with him.

Raph however, was still asleep in his room. Mikey had plans for that.

"Hey, I'm gonna go wake Raph up, kay?" He said to his adoptive sister and her –now- fiancée. They nodded and sipped their hot chocolate.

A grin started to creep up his face as he snuck into Raphael's room; in the past few days they've been to busy with their own business to really get down about the mistletoe thing, but now would be a good time.

"Hey, wake up! It's Christmas dude, wake up!" Mikey said loudly and swung the hammock; tempted to shift it so Raph would spill out right on the floor.

Amber eyes opened slowly. Mikey smiled "Merry Christmas bro!" he cheered in a sing-song voice.

Raph groaned and got up slowly whist rubbing his tired eyes.

"Here's my present to you!" Mikey said and brought out the dragon pendant, which he dropped around Raph's head so it would dangle on his neck.

"Thanks, Mikey. Merry Christmas." Raph said with his own small smile and he fiddled with it for a bit before trying to get up; only for Mikey to suddenly get really close to him.

Both of their skin grew hot.

"Hey Raph?" Mikey said huskily and cupped Raph's face; the normally more abrasive turtle suddenly had a shy look.

"Yeah?" Raph breathed.

"I've had a long time to think and I've got something to ask you…. Will you be my mate?" Mikey asked and sighed when he felt the weight suddenly lift; he did it, he finally asked Raph, after almost two years he finally asked Raph.

"Really? But I thought-!"

"Raph, I _love _you; in two different ways, nothing can destroy that, not even the 'incident'. I'm ready to forgive and forget." Mikey soothed; yes, he was ready to forgive and forget, he can't hold this over Raph forever, if he was ever going to heal fully then he'd have to embrace and act on his true feelings for Raph.

"You're givin' me and second chance?"

"Uh huh." Mikey said with a smile "Well, what's your answer?"

"What do you think?" Raph said to him huskily and put an arm around Mikey's neck to bring them closer together.

They sealed the deal with a kiss. And before they knew it, the new mates were making out right there; in their world, it was only them.

There was a sudden _flash _and a couple giggles which made them pull apart; they turned to the still open door to see Leo and Don standing there, both held goofy grins and Donatello had a digital camera.

"Get a room you two." Leonardo teased and comically wagged his finger at them; Donnie snickered at this.

"Why you two little-!" Mikey and Raph growled in unison before shooting at the door; Raph chased Leo for the remark and Mikey was chasing Don to get the camera.

Moth was watching with wide eyes as she sat on her grandfather Splinters lap. She looked at the age rat in puzzlement. "Always like this?" the four-year-old asked.

"Unfortunately." The ninjitsu master replied and patted the small girls head. April and Casey muffled their giggles best they could, Karai and Chaplin; not so much.

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><p><em>I think this chapter proves that Christmas <strong>is <strong>a time for miracles._

_Unfortunately, dear readers; this story ends next chapter with an epilogue!_


	41. Epilogue

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ninja Turtles; Peter Laird, Kevin Eastman and Mirage comics do…And whoever else.**

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><p><strong>Authors Note to reviewers!<strong>

**I'm not a person of many words, but I'll try.**

**Epicenter**: If I knew you in real life I bet we could be pals! But unfortunately that is not the case (I hear your getting an account, wanna be FF pals?). It is always a pleasure to get reviews from you, dude; and I find your conversations with Rose amusing. You're the only GUY on FF I've met that wasn't an asshole (No offense to any dudes reading this, this refers to MY experiences with dudes on FF; none of them were very good.) and throughout the story your advice did help.

**Rose: **It has been swell talking to you; wanna stay friends, though? Amigo, I love your reviews, and I appreciate you stuck to this story the entire time even though Karai played a big role. You've stuck with me from the beginning and I truly appreciate it. Also, messaging you and getting reviews from you actually helped me a lot while I was writing this; along the way you gave me some idea's (Even the one about Raphael trying to defeat the Shredder!) And I appreciated your compliments too.

**UWU (Steve): **I know you haven't reviewed because you've been busy, but when you did I enjoyed it, I liked your little 'kill Raph' skits!

**Epicenter and Rose: **You two are my favorite reviewers, you were both constant reviewers and it egged me on to update so much and actually finish this story. This was the first story I had where the reviewers interacted with each other. Thank you, you both! Actually, its kind of Ironic how you Epicenter, loved Mikey while you Rose, loved Leo and they were together for a while. Love ya both! (As much as a writer can love their readers without being creepy, at least)

**To anyone else who had reviewed (but isn't constant) or actually bothered to read this entire friggin' story: **The story is finally done! I hope you all enjoyed it; I know I enjoyed writing it! I hope you guys enjoyed the ride.

**ON TO THE LEMON YOU ALL WANT!**

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><p>"You <em>sure <em>ya wanna do dis?" Raph asked his mate cautiously.

"…..You know, with who's doing what, I should be asking _you _that." Mikey snorted and pressed his darker-skinned mate against the ground. Then the younger turtle grinned and added "Or rather; who's doing _who_."

Currently, it was a summer night at Casey's grandmothers farmhouse and they were in the woods; it started out as a late night walk, really, but now….

It was summer now and Raphael and Michaelangelo had been mates for six months; so far they hadn't gotten farther than making out. They hadn't mated with each other because of the incident that happened almost three years ago.

But now they were ready; well, they were ready in their own way, for obvious reasons Mikey would be seme and Raph would be rendered uke. (Seme: Top, Uke: Bottom)

Now they were in an isolated clearing some miles away from the farmhouse; the clearing itself wasn't very big; it was a misshapen circle with the tree's of the woods only several yards apart. But that was okay; at least they were lying on grass rather than dried leaves and twigs, which would make a big mess with so much movement.

Raph rolled his eyes at the earlier comment but then got serious again "I know Mikey it's just that…. You know…." The sour, acidic taste of regret tanged in Raph's mouth; every time he felt regret he would taste alcohol, one of the reasons why he vowed to never touch the stuff ever again.

"Raph," Mikey reminded and grabbed his mates hand "I'm not afraid of this. Well, I'm nervous yeah, but that's normal, right? This is both our first times."

Raph opened his mouth to say something but Mikey guessed what he was going to say and added "Consensual first times, I'm _giving _myself to you and vice versa." The younger of the two lowered his head and kissed his mate between the eyes "Do you trust me?" he asked softly.

Though Raph was (obviously) the more dominant one and thus this would be a little….weird for him, he was willing to let himself be uke for his mate, who _couldn't _be anything besides the seme for a while. "Yeah, I trust ya." He assured with a grin of his own, even if he himself was nervous.

"Good," Mikey said and locked their beaks together; some minutes into it his hands fleeted from Raph's shoulders (which he had been holding down) and while one arm curled around Raph from under them, the other stroked his soft sides between the shell and plastron.

Raph's breathing hitched for a second during the kiss, from their plastrons being pressed together Mikey could feel Raph's heart rate increase noticeably and his body heat rise; body language stated Raph was getting either getting excited or anxious.

Mikey made his blue eyes lock with Raph's own reptilian-yellow ones; Mikey saw lust and desire in Raph's eyes, mingling with the kind of love the other turtle would only show him.

The orange-masked younger took this as encouragement – his hand traveled lower and lower until it was under Raph's shell; he took hold of Raph's tail between his thumb and index finger and rubbed it.

Raph groaned.

Panting; they pulled apart from the kiss; only for Mikey to feverishly latch his mouth onto Raph's collarbone. Raph bit his tongue to resist the sudden urge to whimper – bottom or not there was no way in Hell he'd act like one. What he didn't count on was Mikey's determination to make him whine.

Smirking, Mikey nipped lightly at the skin of Raph's neck and left a barely noticeable mark, which became brighter and darker when he started sucking on it. Mikey rubbed Raph's tail faster and harder – and he felt Raph's pulse rate increase too.

Mikey left a slow, agonizing trail of hikies on Raph's throat and collarbone and pinched the tip of the elders dark green tail.

His reward – a uncharacteristic mewl finally escaped out of Raph's mouth; instantly Mikey looked at Raph when he heard that noise and he could have sworn Raph's face turned red when the orange-masked terrapin chuckled.

"What was that, Raphie?" Mikey teased and pinched the tip of his mates tail again, earning another uncharacteristic mewl from the other turtle. "Did I touch a nerve?"

"S-shut up." Raph snapped, only to mewl again when Mikey pinched the tip of his tail.

"Hnnn…. I like that sound, Raphie." Mikey purred and removed himself from straddling Raph's hips to between his legs.

Raph said nothing, only panted a little. Then gasped when Mikey's finger moved from his tail to his entrance.

"How am I supposed to…. You know…. Without lube or anything?" Mikey wondered aloud; he didn't want to hurt Raph by penetrating him dry, the last thing he wanted to do was hurt his mate on their first time.

"Errr….nggg..." Was Raph's only reply; his mind starting to get in a sort of druggy state when Mikey pressed his finger against his tail hole but didn't sink it inside.

"Hmm… I know!" Mikey said with a sudden idea; Raph watched with his ridges knitted together in confusion when Mikey propped his knees over his shoulders.

"What are - ? !" Raphael started only to cry out in surprise when he felt the sudden sensation of a warm tongue rasping over his tail hole.

"M-Mikey…." Raph whimpered and mentally kicked himself for doing so; but this sensation felt so…. It was indescribable, it felt alien but in a good way, a really good way that seemed overwhelming. The red-masked turtle found himself shifting his hips around – either to get away from the overwhelming feeling and or to encourage the sensation, he did not know – and moaning out loud, his brain too scrambled at the time to really do anything else.

"Like that, Raphie?" Mikey purred and ran a rather heavily saliva-slathered tongue over the others entrance one more time before withdrawing and whiping his mouth with his wrist; that should be good enough.

Raph's face grew hot when Mikey said that, he would _not _let Mikey get off on his vulnerability, no way in Hell.

Mikey grabbed onto Raph legs and adjusted the so they would wrap around his waist, carefully he shifted so his upper body was hovering over Raph's but their lower bodies were still close enough for joining.

Positioning himself at Raph's tail hole, Mikey grabbed onto his mates hand. "You ready?" he asked, panting softly as his animal urges started to take over – the natural urge to claim a mate.

"Yeah, go." Raph urged, though Mikey did catch the edge of anxiety in Raph's tone, hearing that, the sea-green turtle tightened his grip on Raph's hand to offer assurance and slowly pushed inside.

Raph groaned again – but not from pleasure like before – but from pain. One of his hands balled into a fist and the other one held a bone-crushing grip on Mikey's hand. He gnashed his teeth together to refrain from crying out, his eyes shut together tightly to stop from tearing up.

"Are you okay?" Mikey asked concerned, though his voice was getting a bit raspy; his desires unfolding even though he was just barely inside of his mate.

"I-I'm okay, k-keep goin'." Raph managed to say between gnashed teeth; god this hurt so bad, he really wished they had lube.

Slowly, Mikey inched inside even though he wanted so desperately to slam into the other ninja; but he needed to be patient, his mate needed time to adjust. Mikey stilled himself when he was all the way inside to give Raph more time to adjust. The orange-masked turtle groaned at the tightness of his mate and dimly wondered how they can be so hot inside when they were cold-blooded.

Raph slowly got used to the foreign pain which subsided with each passing second and soon enough his own desires unfolded.

"Mikey…. Move." Raph groaned and lightened his grip on his mates hand. Useless nuendo, Mikey's hand would probably still have marks on it for a while.

Nodding, Mikey slowly pulled out and thrusted back in at a faster speed. He repeated this a few times before he picked up a rhythm. The wonderful sound of his mate gasping in pleasure reached his ears (well, whatever it was they used to hear anyways) when he brushed against something inside of Raph. Eager to please his mate again Mikey thrusted at an angle and hit it again; Raph gasped again in pleasure and jerked a little.

"God….You're so tight, Raphie…." Mikey moaned and rocked inside of his mate, any other words he could think of melted into goo in his pleasure-ridden mind.

"M-Mikey… Fasta'." Raph moaned, almost incoherently and tossed his head side to side at the sudden pleasure he was feeling, which was ruling out the earlier pain.

Mikey didn't need to be asked twice.

After ten minutes of passionate love-making they were both on edge; they were sweating, gasping and moaning out each others names. Raph had his head on one side, panting lightly as Mikey continued softly thrust into him.

"Mikey I-I'm gonna-!"

"I k-know; me t-too!"

Raph's hips jerked around and released all over his and Mikey's plastrons, his walls tightened around the younger turtle. "MIKEY!" He cried out and fell back breathing heavily.

With a few last hard thrusts, Mikey stopped and jerked around too. "RAPH!" He shouted and came inside his mate. He collapsed on top of his lover, breathing heavily as well.

For a few minutes they stayed connected before Mikey slowly pulled out; both groaned as he did. But when he finally was out, a small trickle of semen ran out of Raph's entrace, mixed with another small trickle of blood.

Seeing the blood, Mikey whimpered.

"Raph, I'm sorry." Mikey crooned and kissed his mates cheek; guilty that he hurt him.

"Hey," Raph said and cupped the youngest turtles cheek "don't worry about it bro; everyone bleeds da first time, I'm okay."

"Promise?"

"Promise."

Mikey rolled off of Raph and they lie there in that clearing with each other; waiting for the mating heat and aftershocks to wear off.

Raph turned to his side and lazily put an arm around his mate, his eyes were tired and droopy.

"Hey Raph?"

"Hnnn?"

"I love you."

"I love you too Mikey… More den you can believe."

"Glad to hear it."

And so just as the horizon started turning shades of blue and purple as the sun rose, which gave the previously dark sky a soft navy cast.

But they paid no heed to the sunrise, because in each others arms the young lovers feel asleep.

* * *

><p>It was dawn and a few minutes previous Leonaro had woken up to find Moth practicing with her wooden swords; Moth was nocturnal, sleeping during the day and active at night, a habit she picked up while she and Mikey lived up in Minesota. Leo was watching and occasionaly helping the child when she made a wrong move in her kata's.<p>

Suddenly, Moth abruptly stopped and sighed heavily; her shoulders slouched over as if she'd previously been carrying something on her shoulder and someone had taken it off.

"Moth? Something wrong?" Leo asked his neice, confused.

The dusky-brown haired child turned to her uncle and re-sheathed her swords. "Don't know why... But it like something lifted, something we didn't know was there 'till it was gone. (1)"

"Like what?" Leo asked with a raised ridge.

"I dunno." Moth said and shrugged before yawning "I'm tired, g'morning uncle Leo." She excused before going to one of the rooms upstairs.

Leo stared as she walked up the stairs and passed Donnie who was comming down.

"Good morning Leo." Donnie said with a yawn then noticed the puzzled look his mate had. "Something up?"

"Weird kid." Was Leo's only reply. Don placed a hand on Leo shoulder and gave him a small smile.

"Leo; she's _Mikey's _kid, this _surprises _you?" Don asked with a chuckle. "Think about the past two years, and tell me Mikey's kid being weird is shocking."

Leo thought about it all; so much had happened, back then time seemed to move too slow, but now it seemed like that was so long ago and it'd passed so fast. Those times of pain, fear, confusion...

"It's a good thing Donnie, it's a good thing." Leo said with his brown eyes glazed over; yes, it was a good thing Moth was weird, because she'd been raised by Mikey; it meant things were finally good again, this was all past them.

Donnie gave his mate a odd look.

"Moth isn't the only weird one."

* * *

><p><em>AND IT'S OVER! <em>_Hehe... Who enjoyed the lemon? I bet none of you expected Mikey to be the dominant one; but it really shouldn't be surprising, he must have gotton more 'dominant' behavior while he was trained in the Foot. And not to mentioned the way he acted for the majority of the fic._

_**1)** What she meant was tension; there was a pretty heavy tension between Mikey and Raph because they couldn't express their love for each other, but since they just had... Well, you get the idea. And no Moth doesn't have special powers or anything, just call it a childs intuition._

_Oh by the way, along the story I actually had origonally planned for Leo and Mikey to have sex (Mikey being seme), which would make Mikey less afraid of sexual things and eventually lead to him flirt with Raph, but it just didn't fit in with the plot and would make this way longer so that idea was off!_

_I had also planned for 'Angelo' to do more Foot stuff, but that didn't fit into the plot either._


End file.
